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“Hours ago would have been best.”
I glare at him. “You obviously knew we were downstairs. Why didn’t you come tell us this? It’s kind of important.”
“And interrupt your magic moment? There are so few joys in this world anymore, why would I steal that from you two?”
I look at Ryan. “Is he messing with me or is he being serious? I can’t read him.”
“No one can,” Ryan says. “He’s written in backwards brail.”
I glare at Trent again. “It’d be easier just to kill him.”
“You’re welcome to try.”
Trent smiles.
“Alright, let’s not waste time.” I turn to Ryan, holding up my arm. “Take the splint off. Let’s go.”
He stares down at me for a long time, just looking. I wait patiently, my arm still held out to him.
“Would it to any good at all,” he asks quietly, his eyes imploring, “to ask you to stay here. Not tell you, but ask you nicely to stay here and wait for me?”
I take a deep breath, reminding myself I’m mending fences here. “I appreciate that you’re not trying to tell me what to do. Consider your effort acknowledged.”
“I’m marking it in the minutes of this conversation,” Trent tells us.
“Not helping,” Ryan mutters, glaring at him over my shoulder.
“But,” I say firmly, shaking my arm to get Ryan’s attention, “it doesn’t change the fact that I’m coming with you. I’m the one with Vin’s ring—“
“You could give it to me.”
“And I’m the one who was sent in his place.”
“They don’t know that.”
“I’m the one who knows about the Colony.”
“You’ve told me what you know.”
“I’m the one who was kidnapped, held prisoner, watched her friend nearly killed and murdered a woman in cold blood to get out!” I shout, deciding fences are overrated anyway. “I’m going!”
“Alright,” Ryan says softly. Too softly. He steps closer, pushing my arm down out of the way. “Then what about this? They didn’t ask to see you. They want to see me about the Underground. It has nothing to do with you and I can tell them that at the door if you try to go with me. You’ll be locked out, treated like a girl from the stables.”
“You wouldn’t,” I growl, fully believing the look in his eyes that says yes, he would.
He nods slowly. “Oh yeah, I would. If it means keeping you from going there, I would.”
“I promised them, Ryan.”
“And we’ll keep your promise. I’ll help you. We’ll go to the Vashons. We don’t need The Hive.”
“What’s a Vashon?” Trent asks.
I bristle, hating the interruption, but I bite my tongue because I’ve already shouted at one of them in the last few minutes. I’m not looking to lash out at everyone. Not yet.
“A group Crenshaw mentioned. We were just with him asking his advice,” Ryan tells him, still standing in my space.
He’s towering over me, probably to intimidate me, but what he doesn’t know (what I’ll never tell him) is that it’s comforting. Eye level with his chest, seeing his shoulders go on for miles, knowing the strength lying in wait inside; it’s comforting. He has my back and he’s strong enough to rely on. I can let a little bit of the weight of the world pass on to him and he can take it. That’s terrifyingly wonderful. It’s why I don’t step away. Not because I don’t want to retreat. Don’t want to show weakness. Okay, that’s part of it, but mostly it’s because I just like it. I like him.
“They live on an island down south. It’s supposed to be Risen free,” I tell Trent.
“That’s a sweet fairytale,” Trent chuckles.
“I don’t think it is. I think it’s for real. At least it was the last he knew of it. Either way, it’s worth a try. It’s a better option than owing anything to The Hive.”
“But what if it’s not real?” I ask, looking up into his face. “What if we get there and it’s nothing? Then we need The Hive anyway and we lost our shot at talking to them.”
Ryan shakes his head, his eyes locked on mine. “I’d rather take the risk that they don’t exist than risk taking you—“
“We’d need a boat.”
Ryan and I both turn to look at Trent.
“Why?”
“It’s an island, right? We’d need a boat to get to it. Do you have a boat?”
I shake my head even though I imagine I’m not meant to answer that question.
“No,” Ryan admits darkly.
“Well then, problem solved,” Trent says happily, standing. “We need The Hive after all.”
Chapter Nine
Ryan, Trent and I walk through the dark streets together, heading for The Hive. This area is relatively cleared of Risen, not much of a surprise. But the empty, silent streets make me more nervous than a horde would. It’s ominous and horrifying. I’m shaking a little, though I’d never let them know it. My arm is aching being out of the splint, the thin material of my worn, black fleece the only protection it has left. It’s not ready. Maybe I’m not ready. But the dull yellow glow of the lights inside the aquarium are burning at the end of the street and it’s too late to turn back now.
“Crenshaw isn’t going to be happy about this,” Ryan grumbles.
“Cren ain’t gots to know ‘bout it.”
He looks over at me, his face worried and confused. “Are you alright?”
“No,” I mutter, wiping my sweating palms on my pants. “I’m freaking out a little.”
“It shows. What was that?”
“I’ve heard the gangs talk like that before,” I say defensively.
“Well, most don’t so, you know… don’t.”
“Thanks for the advice.”
He glances over at me, the confusion gone but the worry etched deep in his eyes. “I won’t let them keep you here.”
“That’s not what I’m worried about.”
I won’t let them keep me here.
“Then what are you afraid of?” Trent asks.
“Did I say I was afraid? No one said afraid. Let’s keep it on the real, boys.”
“Stop that,” Ryan reminds me.
“Right, yeah. I’m not afraid. I’m just freaked. It’s different.”
“What are you freaked about?”
“There are Risen in there. In a crowded room. That’s a big red flag right there; the mass of people. I’m not a fan.”
“Joss, you know it takes a long time to turn. Way longer than it used to.”
“But there are tons of people in there that come in contact with Risen for fun. I’m not done worrying you’ll still turn from being around them with your open cuts. What kind of wounds do all of them have? How old are they?”
“We cleaned mine early, I’m fine. Calm down. It’s not like it used to be.”
“If a person is bitten, though—“
“They’re done for, I know. But we’ll be out of there way before they turn.”
“It’s stupid.”
“Keep that to yourself when you get in there.”
“I’m not great at censoring myself.”
“Maybe don’t talk at all,” Trent suggests.
Ryan and I both glare at him. He shrugs, unconcerned.
“You can talk, just be careful what you say,” Ryan tells me. “Less is more.”
“I tried to say that about her clothes and you told me to f—“
“Don’t start that again,” Ryan warns Trent.
“What about my clothes?” I ask, glancing down at my tattered jeans and too large coat.
Trent smirks at me. “You look like a tomboy.”
“Because I am, Trent.”
“I told him we should bring you in looking like a stable girl. It would make more sense.”
“And I said drop it,” Ryan warns him, his voice becoming hot.
“Like a pro?” I ask, shocked.
But then I wonder why I’m shocked. How else are they meant to explain me? Where have I been hiding if not inside a stable? I’ll cause more of a stir walking in looking like this, like I don’t owe anyone anything, than I would waltzing in naked. I’m definitely not doing that, that’s insane and I’m pretty sure it’s so far outside my comfort zone that I’d vomit from the stress, but it’s something to consider.
I quickly strip off my jacket, carefully peeling it over my aching arm.
“Hold this,” I snap at Trent, throwing the jacket in his face.
It falls away to reveal his feline smile, his eyes watching me in the dark.