The Variables

“Dad—” Lucy started.

“You would follow this boy into the wilderness? Do you have any idea what it’s like out there?” Scott flung his hand wildly toward the window.

“Yes,” Lucy answered in a heartbeat. “I do. Because I’ve been out there!” She blushed and tried to calm the building tide of resentment. How could he not remember that she and Ethan had been left behind? In snippets, he had learned of Spencer’s maniacal reign, and the ever-present fight for food and water. He had heard of her and Grant’s travels across America—encountering the bodies, the flooding, the quiet dissent into a world governed by nature and not man. It was her father who didn’t understand.

“I’ve been out there, too,” Ethan said as he walked down the steps. Step, wait. Step, wait. His careful maneuvering drew their attention upward. His hands slid down the ba

“I’ve been out there for longer...and with others who have survived. And the biggest threat we had collectively were the people in this building.”

“You would have died without us intervening,” Scott said. “It’s simple.”

Ethan scoffed. “Maybe I would have. Or maybe I wouldn’t have. That’s the thing that you don’t seem to understand. It’s really not as simple as you’d like to believe. It’s a complicated mess...and it’s a mess that everyone in this room is responsible for. There’s no one right thing to do.”

“We should all go,” Lucy said. “As a family.”

The offer stood. Maxine looked at Scott, and Lucy thought she saw the eagerness in her eyes, but maybe it was wishful thinking. Her mother had made her views on Kymberlin clear during their date.

“Am I invisible in my own house?” her father shouted. “I can’t listen to this.” And Scott, still in his pajamas, walked past everyone and out into the hallway, slamming the door behind him. When the echo of his exit had died away, Maxine went to her children. She didn’t say a word for a long moment and then she took Lucy and Ethan’s hands and held them tightly. Grant stayed off to the side, watching and waiting.

“I used to hold your hands like this when you were little. One hand for Lucy, one hand for Ethan. Ethan always pulled forward, so eager to get wherever we were going, and Lucy never pulled. She would hold my hand until I let go first.” Maxine closed her eyes.

“Mom—” Ethan started, but she silenced him.

“You will allow me this. I have earned my right to tell you exactly what I think. Whether you listen or not, I have earned that much. If you leave this place, you will leave me broken, it will leave us broken...”

“You’re leaving?”

They all turned to the left. Galen stood shivering in a flimsy pair of shorts and his Beatles t-shirt. His arms were crossed over his chest and he looked at his sister and brother, and then his mother, with his eyes narrowed. He looked on the verge of tears, his bottom lip quivering.

“You can’t do that,” Galen said when no one answered him. “You can’t. That’s not fair.”

Maxine rushed to Galen and put an arm around his shoulder, but he shrugged her off and ran back downstairs. They watched him go, unable to stop him, unsure of what to call after him.

Lucy and Ethan exchanged a look. It was Lucy who spoke. “No one can know that it’s a possibility. Not even Galen...we’ll have to talk to him.”

Ethan nodded with authority. “Huck will come after anyone who leaves...escaping serves no purpose if we spend our entire lives being hunted.”

“Our?” Lucy repeated. “Ethan...”

“Lucy,” Ethan said. “You may not know what the future holds for you...and that’s okay. But I’m getting out of this place. I’m going with Grant...I’m taking Teddy to Darla. I’m going to see Ainsley…to my friends. That’s where I belong.”

Maxine took a step back toward her children and she watched them without interrupting.

“Mom...” he continued. “I...”

She put both her hands up and tried to get him to stop. “No,” she said from several feet away. “You don’t have to explain it to me.”

“I’m working on a plan...I have some ideas,” Ethan said, turning his attention back to the task at hand. “Things that would assure us a clean break. They aren’t foolproof, but they would buy us a chance to escape without a trace.”

Then, as if it was slowly dawning on him, Grant frowned. “So, then, wait. The only way we get off Kymberlin safely...would be...”

They turned to look at him. “If they think you’re dead,” Lucy finished.

From downstairs they heard a door slam and then the sounds of the other kids roused from sleep. Time was ru

“Mom.” Lucy walked over to her mother and buried her head into her chest. “You should leave. You know this place isn’t safe...don’t stay here...”

“I have to stay,” Maxine replied. “It’s not easy for me to let Ethan go, but there are the little ones to think of. Lucy, I can’t. This is a decision you have to make without me by your side. No matter which choice you make, there will be goodbyes.” Her mother turned from her, unable to say more.

Her mind wandered to Cass’s Guedeh card that day in the fortune teller booth back in the System. The card had not told her which heartache she would choose, but one thing was certain: the cost was high. How could she walk away, forever, from the family she had fought to find?

It already felt like their funeral. A deep and sudden sadness enshrouded them as they left the confines of the King house and ventured out into Kymberlin tower. Ethan, Grant, and Lucy walked in silence. It wasn’t the awkward silence of people unable to strike up any semblance of a conversation, but the deep and penetrating silence of people who knew that whatever they said would be wrong.

When they reached the elevator, Ethan hesitated.

“I’ll meet up with you two later,” he said and started off toward the sky bridge. Lucy knew where he was headed.

“Wait,” Lucy said, she hopped to catch up. “Will you tell her?”

“Should I?”

Lucy shrugged. “Would she come with us?”

Ethan shook his head. “No.” He scratched at his cheek. “I think she likes it here. She can live with a foot in both worlds. Cass knows what she’s doing, Lucy... on Kymberlin, she’ll always have everything she wants. The thing about Cass is that she plays well in this world. She moves fluidly between everyone, and the outside world has no draw for her...”

“But she won’t have you,” Lucy said, baiting him.

“She never had me,” Ethan replied lowering his chin. “It wasn’t like that.”

“You definitely have a type,” Lucy teased. “Cass was too smart for you.” She felt Grant at her elbow and she turned. “So,” she looked back at her brother, “you’re not telling her?”

“I’m not,” Ethan replied. “It’s better that way. Safer for her.” Then he added, “But I want to make sure I see her again...she was good to me, Lucy. She was a good friend…and I needed a friend.”

“I know,” Lucy replied and she smiled sadly.

He left them standing there and walked off toward Cass. Lucy knew that Ethan must have a plan, but she didn’t want to push for details. The moving pieces of an escape were beyond Lucy’s imagining. At the moment, all she knew is that it had to happen. And that it would have to be final. Once off Kymberlin, they were off forever. Beyond that: nothing. Crickets and cobwebs, and daring ideas cut short by logic and logistics.