Shaken, Not Stirred

I nod my head in absolute shame, my eyes lowering to my cup. “Some of them didn’t deserve it.”

“You never led them on,” Gabby says, and she knows this about me because I’ve always been candid with not only my conquests, but with my friends when it came to how I treated said conquests. I openly shared my boundaries of no love, no commitment, and no hassles with friends and lovers alike.

“I didn’t,” I agree. “But regardless of the type of men they were, I guess no one deserved for me to take my wrath out on them.”

“I want to get back to the part about you going on a date with him,” Alyssa says.

“It was so stupid,” I say sheepishly. “I saw him at the grocery store and I had every intention of just laying into him, but then I thought… I should do to him what he did to me. So he really knows how it feels.”

“So you were going to do what?” Sava

“She was going to bring him to his knees with lust, and then she was going to walk away,” Gabby says confidently. “And yeah… that was a stupid idea, Casey.”

“I know,” I say with a grimace. “Te

“As he should have,” Gabby butts in and when my eyes flash at her, she says, “Sorry… please continue.”

“I never intended to cross any line with Jeff. It was only meant to be words to get him hot. And trust me, my dirty talk is really hot. I told Te

“As he should have been,” Gabby mumbles, and I ignore her.

“But I couldn’t go through with it. I left him in the restaurant,” I tell her, and she smiles at me brightly. “And Te

“And what was the outcome?” Andrea asks.

“Te

All four women break out in loud cackles, Sava

Shaking my head… chuckling with my peeps, I assure her, “I swear to God. He fucking peed his pants.”

“Oh my God,” Alyssa snorts. “I think I’m going to pee mine.”

“Te

“So you see,” I say, bringing the conversation around full circle. “I really like him.”

“Oh, baby,” Alyssa says with a knowing look. “You more than like him.”

“Maybe,” I admit while nibbling on my lower lip. “I don’t know. I’ve never had these feelings before.”

“What does it feel like?” Sava

I close my eyes briefly, and the image of Te

“Wow,” Alyssa murmurs.

“Dying here,” Sava

“Speechless,” Andrea says.

“Holy shit, girl,” Gabby exclaims. “You are so in love with him.”

My entire body startles over her proclamation, and I immediately shake my head in denial. “No way. It’s not love,” I stubbornly assert.

“That is so love,” Sava

“I don’t do love,” I practically whine. “I don’t know how to do it. I’m just now getting comfortable with the idea that I like Te

“None of us were really ready for it,” Andrea says thoughtfully. “But when it comes… you just know it.”

“But I don’t ‘just know it’,” I maintain. “I’m having all kinds of doubts still. It feels awkward to me.”

Gabby reaches across the table and grabs my hand. “Push through it, Casey,” she says in almost a warning tone. “Don’t you dare let this guy get away. He’s the real deal.”

“How do you know?” I ask quietly… skeptically.

“Because… he’s the reason you’re even sitting here with us waxing poetic about rainy days and rainbows. You’re in a relationship, Casey, and while it’s awkward to you, I guarantee you that it’s fantastic too, right?”

I nod at her, my eyes filling with unmeasured hope. Could I do this? Could I push past my fears and really have something serious with Te

“You need to grab onto it, Casey, and make it your bitch,” Gabby says with a wink and a smirk.

“Yeah,” Andrea says in affirmation. “Make love your bitch.”

“That should be a hashtag on Twitter,” Alyssa says, and Sava

Make love my bitch?

Hmmmmm. That sounds like something Casey Markham would do.

After having the most fun breakfast of my entire life, I swing by my place and grab Te

The view isn’t good enough.

The carpet’s too old.

The front door sticks.

The bathroom isn’t big enough.

As we walk through the last house on the list today, I take in the open and airy living room that overlooks the Atlantic, a well-designed kitchen, brand-new hardwood floors, and a huge master bedroom that has a bathroom so big that it has a Jacuzzi tub. It falls well within the budget Te

“I dare you to find something wrong with this place,” I tell Te

He walks up to the railing, places his hands there, and leans forward while staring at the ocean. His profile is as stu

“I don’t like it,” he finally says.

“What the hell, Te

Blue eyes stay focused on the water but he speaks directly to me. “You’re not living here. That’s what’s wrong with it.”

Te

“Cat got your tongue, Goldie?” he asks wickedly.

I give a small shake to my head and practically stutter out, “Are you saying you want to live together?”

One minute, he’s leaning there all casual yet self-assured, and the next minute, he has me turned so my back is to the railing and he’s kissing me so hard I bend backward. His kiss conveys a message to me loud and clear. He’s possessive and he wants me in his bed, wherever that may be.

When he finally pulls away, I almost whimper at the loss of his mouth against mine. I loosen my fingers, which I find had somehow unknowingly fisted hard onto his t-shirt, and blow a huff of breath out.