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“She doesn’t even want to go, Julie.” he said feebly. “Really.”
“She does, too. You saw how she looked at that invitation.”
Matt let out a big sigh. “I’ll talk to my parents.”
“And call Dana. I gave you her number months ago.”
“She had mono.”
“So what? You could have brought her soup. Tended to her needs, if you know what I mean.” Julie gave him an exaggerated wink.
“I did call her, and she said she felt awful and that she’d call me when she was less plague-like.”
“I talked to her this morning, and she feels better. She’s been holed up in her apartment for ages, and she’s ready for some fun.”
“If you wink at me again, I will never call her.”
“Fine. Stop being so uptight.”
“Did it ever occur to you that I might have to be? I have a lot to manage.”
Julie put her hands on her hips and took a breath. “Sorry.”
“Anything else you want me to do? Should I start a list of all of your assigned tasks?”
“That’s it. For now. But call Dana, and go on a date like a regular college boy. And don’t wear a weird shirt.”
“Define weird.”
“Nice try.”
**********
Julie lay down on her stomach, her fingers poised over the keyboard. The only light in the bedroom came from the glow of the laptop, but she didn’t need to see anything else right now except the online chat between her and Fi
Julie Seagle
OK, so I told you about Celeste’s upcoming sleepover and Matt’s possible date. What else….?
Fi
I project that the sleepover will be a success, and the date will not. Matt tends to get gassy when he’s nervous and, well, you know… That doesn’t usually go over so well with the ladies.
Julie Seagle
I gather he did actually have a girlfriend for a while, so presumably he can maintain control of his bodily functions for short periods. You should wish him well!
Fi
I wish this poor Dana girl well, poor thing… I’m joking! I’m sure they will be engaged by the end of the date. Aha! And then we can dance at the wedding. I will wear a purple tuxedo so that I stand out and can be identifiable next to Flat Fi
Julie Seagle
You’re warped.
Fi
You are not the first, and will not be the last, to say so. I wear my “warped” label with pride. On my lapel. A lapel label!
Fi
You have no impending events yourself?
Julie Seagle
I’ve been taking it easy since the Polar Plunge. A frail girl like myself only has so much stamina, you know.
Fi
Ha! Weak you are not. I was very impressed by your daring feat. Terrified, but impressed. But maybe you have a date yourself…?
Julie Seagle
Nope. Not interested in anyone here.
Fi
Good. Just checking. I mean, you should go out with whomever you want, of course.
Julie Seagle
Oh.
Fi
But I don’t want you to go out with anyone. Is that unfair of me?
Julie Seagle
It would be unfair if I were not going out with anyone else just because you didn’t want me to. I’m waiting.
Fi
Waiting for what?
Julie Seagle
Just waiting. Maybe waiting for you. (Which, as it turns out, is a lot like waiting for Godot.) But that sounds crazy.
Fi
I’m glad you’re maybe waiting for me, crazy girl. (FYI, that play is based on one of my past lives, but I totally didn’t get any financial kickback. Publishing bastards!) And Julie, my dear, you get to see me all the time… in flat form. I’m dashing, yes?
Julie Seagle
A regular heartthrob, although I’m dying to catch sight of a three-dimensional you someday.
Fi
Believe me, I’ve thought about a three-dimensional you plenty.
Julie Seagle
I’m hoping that just sounds creepier than it actually is. Hey, Fi
Fi
Yeeeeeessss?
Julie Seagle
Remember when I was stuck in the elevator? We got interrupted.
Fi
We did.
Julie Seagle
I want to know how the skydiving story ends. What you say to me and how we land.
Fi
OK. I was hoping you’d ask. I’ll tell you.
Fi
When we last saw our hero and heroine, they had just pulled the chute and were drifting. What will happen next, concerned viewer? Will our brave couple have their chute torn to shreds by a savage vampire seagull? Will a freakish tornado appear and suck them into a swirling wind current? Stay tuned…
Julie Seagle
Fi
Fi
Ohhhhhh. You want the good version.
Julie Seagle
Yes.
Fi
The slow version.
Julie Seagle
Yes.
Fi
The hot version.
Julie Seagle
Yes.
Fi
I gotcha. I like that one better too. Ready? Here we go…
So we’ve pulled the chute, and we’re drifting, riding the sky. It’s just you and me. You can hear me now that we’re falling like this, remember? I tell you that I don’t want this to end. I don’t want to land and reach the real world, because I like our world up here better.
Fi
I tell you that I like being this close to you and how you feel against me. But now even I’m hesitant to jump. I’m afraid that when we hit the ground, this will be over. We’ll land and this feeling between us will vanish. That you won’t feel it any longer. I can’t stand that thought.
Julie’s hands shook as she wrote.
Julie Seagle
I’ll still feel it.
Fi
You think?
Julie Seagle