The Unbound

“I’m so sorry I missed that,” I say with a small smile. And then, in response to her gold-eyed death glare, I add, “I mean all of it. I’m having trouble picturing Cash in any of those poses.”

“I’ll have you know that I do a mean sun salutation.” He proceeds to hop up and demonstrate something that I can only imagine is loosely related to yoga. Everyone laughs and cheers him on, but Wesley finds my eyes across the circle and gives me a questioning look, so I dig my phone out of my bag and text him one word.

Therapy.

Cash has taken his seat again after collecting a healthy amount of applause, and the group is back to talking about Fall Fest.

“What is it exactly?” I ask.

“It’s just a dance,” says Wes.

“Just a dance?” says Cash with mock affront.

“It sets the tone for the entire year,” adds Safia.

“It’s the official back-to-school party,” explains Gavin. “Tomorrow night. It’s always the first of September, and the senior class is in charge of organizing it.”

“And it’s going to be a blast,” says Cash. “There’s music, and food, and dancing, and we’re going to end the night with fireworks.”

“Of course it’s Hyde,” cuts in Safia, “so the dress code’s killer strict. Most people just stay in uniform.”

“But there are no rules for hair and makeup,” says Gavin. “Some people treat it like a contest to see how strange you can get without breaking dress code.”

“Last year Saf and Cash both went with bright blue hair,” says Amber. “And Wes embraced his i

“Seriously?” I say. Wesley winks at me, and I laugh. “I can’t imagine that.”

“Crazy, right?” she says. “Anyway, you can wear wacky jewelry or weird makeup or neon leggings.”

“It’s kind of awesome to see everyone as a stranger version of themselves,” says Gavin.

“You’re going, right, Mackenzie?” asks Amber.

I shake my head. “Sorry, don’t think so.” I’m pretty sure my house arrest doesn’t have a school dance loophole.

“Hey,” says Gavin, addressing me. “Is everything okay?”

“Why wouldn’t it be?” I ask.

“I heard you had to leave class.”

Wesley’s brow creases with concern. “You okay?”

“Wow,” I say, glancing at Safia, “word does travel fast around here.”

“Don’t look at me,” she says. “To talk about it I’d have to care, which I don’t. But I did hear a rumor about you and Cash this morning in front of the—”

“What happened?” cuts in Amber. “In class?”

“Nothing,” I say. “I didn’t feel well, so I left.”

“Cash’s crappy coffee,” offers Saf.

“Hey,” snaps Cash, “I only buy gourmet.”

“The corner store doesn’t have gourmet, and you know it.”

Saf and Cash start bickering, but Wes isn’t so quick to drop the subject. Are you all right? he mouths at me across the circle, giving me a weighted look. I force myself to nod. He looks skeptical, but then Cash turns to him and says, “Have you decided yet if you’re taking Elle or Merilee or Amber?”

Wesley, still considering me, says, “I’m not taking any of them.”

Safia gasps. “Wesley Ayers, going stag?”

He shrugs, finally turning his attention back to the group. “I didn’t want to pick just one and deprive the others of my company.” He flashes a crooked smile when he says it, but the line rings hollow.

“No one’s taking anyone,” a

“Screw your group,” says Safia. “I’ve already got a date.”

“You’ve been working hard enough to get one,” says Cash.

Saf throws a book at his head. It nearly hits Gavin, and the rest of lunch is a blur of chattering, bickering, and festival prep.

I barely hear a word they say.

As the lunch bell rings, I scribble another plea to the Archive.

Again it’s denied.

“When did Safia decide to join the Court?”

Amber and I are walking to Physiology, our shoes echoing against the science hall’s marble entryway.

“Ah, the migration,” says Amber cheerfully. “A time-honored tradition, really. Saf starts the school year determined to make a name for herself, climb the social ladder, build an entourage of minions—god knows enough of the first and second years are willing—and then she realizes something.”

“What’s that?”

Amber smiles and lifts her chin. “That the Court is, in fact, infinitely cooler than anyone else she’ll find at Hyde. She usually comes around before Fall Fest, and we welcome her back as though she never left. I’m sure she’d rather just ditch the act, but she’ll never admit she actually wants to hang out with Cash.”

And I’m sure Wesley has nothing to do with it, I think as Amber squints at me.

“Speaking of Cash—” she starts.

“Any new leads on the Judge Phillip case?” I say, changing the subject as obviously as possible. “Or Bethany?” Amber sighs, but takes the bait and shakes her head. “I haven’t seen Dad this stressed in ages. They put a new case on his plate this weekend. Another unsolvable. This one doesn’t even have a crime scene or a point of departure. Some guy just went for a morning run and never came back. The brother finally reported him missing.”

My stomach twists. Jason.

“How can they possibly expect him to solve that?” I ask.

Amber shrugs. “It’s his job, I guess. They act like he’s some miracle-worker. Trust me, he’s not.” Halfway up the stairs, she says, “Hey, can I ask you a question?”

“Sure thing.”

I expect her to ask why her father picked me up this weekend, but instead she asks, “How long have you known Wesley?”

“A couple months,” I say, rounding up. It certainly feels like longer.

“And how long do you think he’s been in love with you?”

I feel the heat creeping into my face. “We’re just friends.” Amber makes a sound of disbelief. “I mean, we’re close,” I add. Bonded by secrets and scars. “But we’re not…I don’t…I care about Wesley, and he cares about me.”

“Look,” she says as we reach the classroom, “I just met you, but I’ve known Wesley for ages. I can tell you that ‘he cares’ is an understatement.” Amber steps out of the way to let someone get to class. “Did you really kiss Cash this morning?”

“He kissed me,” I clarify, “and it ended right there.”

Amber waves a hand. “I don’t care about the details. The point is, I don’t want you playing games with Wes. He’s been through a lot, and I think he’s finally in a good place, and—”

“And you don’t think I’m good for him.”

The words hit like a blow, even though they’re mine. Because they’re true. I’m not good for him. At least, I haven’t been. I want to be. But how can I? I feel like a bomb waiting to go off; I don’t want him holding on to me when it does. But he won’t let go, and I can’t seem to, either.

“I didn’t say that,” says Amber. “It’s just…Gavin and Saf and Cash and I, we work really hard to keep him in that good place. He may live in a big house on a hill, but we’re his family. I don’t know how much you know about his life before you came into it, but he’s been hurt by a fair number of people. He may have put himself back together decently, but he’s not all the way there. And it’s obvious he cares about you a lot; so all I’m saying is, don’t hurt him, okay? Because it’s obvious you’re going through some things, too, and I want you to be really sure before you let him fall any harder for you. Be sure that you’re good for him.”

She opens the door. “And if you’re not, don’t let him fall at all.”

Mr. Lowell’s out, and the sub in Government spends the first half of the period reading everything Lowell’s already taught us straight off a handout, then decides that revolution is too heavy for a Monday and mercifully lets us go early. There’s a text from Mom saying she’s going to be late picking me up—I’m hoping I can use it as leverage when the topic of transport comes up again tomorrow morning—which leaves me with half an hour or so to kill. I send a third request to the Archive, then wander out onto the quad to wait for the reply.