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Like me…
Oh God! I thought, realizing what that twinge in my gut must mean. Oh God, I’m jealous. I’m seriously fucking jealous! Oh, shit!
I decided I was sick. I had a fever or PMS or something was severely impairing my mental stability, because there was no way in hell I’d be jealous that a man-whore like Wesley was hitting on someone else. I mean, that was his nature. The world might have actually stopped spi
“Are you okay, Bianca?” Jessica asked. She swiveled around in her desk to look at me. “You look p.o.’ed. Are you mad or something?”
“I’m fine.” But my words came out through gritted teeth.
“Okay,” Jessica said. She was just as gullible as my mom. “Listen, Bianca, I really think you should talk to Casey. She’s kind of upset, and I think you two really need to have a heart-to-heart. Maybe today? After class?”
“Yeah… whatever.” But I wasn’t listening. I was too busy coming up with ways to mutilate Louisa’s perfect little face.
PMS. This was definitely just a bad case of PMS.
I got my ass out of that classroom the second the bell rang. My head would explode if I had to hear Louisa’s girly, oh-I’m-so-happy-you’re-flirting-with-me-Wesley giggle one more fucking time. So what if she was as thin as my pinkie and had boobs the size of basketballs! I bet she had an IQ of twenty-seven.
Stop it, I told myself. Louisa has never done anything to me. I have no right to think those things about her… even if she might be a moron.
I threw my stuff into my locker and ran toward the cafeteria, eager to escape the school building. I was so focused on not thinking about my PMS-induced jealousy that I didn’t even see Toby until I skidded to a stop about six inches from him.
“In a hurry?” he asked me.
“Sort of,” I sighed. “Sorry for almost ru
“It’s not a problem.” He nervously played with his glasses. “But do you think you’d mind slowing down the pace? I’d like to talk to you.”
I wasn’t all that surprised. Toby and I had kind of gotten to be friends over the past couple weeks. We mostly talked in AP government, but you know, that was a definite improvement. Actually, I’d even become somewhat comfortable around him. While my heart still fluttered a little when he walked into the room, I no longer worried about losing my voice.
“Sure.” I said. At least it would give me something else to think about for a few minutes.
He smiled and fell into step with me. “Can you keep a secret?” he asked as we reached the cafeteria, where the student body congregated, waiting for the final bell that would dismiss them for the afternoon.
“Most of the time. Why?”
“Do you remember when I missed school a few weeks ago? The day after Valentine’s Day?”
“Uh-huh. I believe that was the worst day of Mr. Chaucer’s life,” I said. “I thought the guy was going to cry when he realized no one was there to do most of his job for him.”
Toby laughed—but only a small laugh—and said, “I was skipping school… well, for an interview.” He pulled a large envelope from the inside of his blazer and whispered, “I applied to Harvard. I just got my letter in the mail this morning.”
“Why is that a secret?”
His cheeks went pink in the cutest possible way. “I don’t want to be humiliated if I don’t get in,” he said.
“You’ll get in.”
“I don’t know that.”
“I do.”
“I wish I had as much confidence in me as you do.”
“Oh, come on, Toby,” I said seriously. “All great politicians—like senators and presidents—go to awesome colleges. You’re going to be a great politician, so they have to let you in. Besides, you’re one of the smartest kids in the senior class. You’re valedictorian, aren’t you?”
“I am,” Toby agreed, frowning at his envelope. “But… but it’s Harvard.”
“And you’re Toby.” I shrugged. “Even if you didn’t get in, there are a million other schools that would kill to have you. That doesn’t matter, though, because I know you got in. Do yourself a favor and open the letter.”
Toby stopped in the middle of the cafeteria and smiled at me. “See,” he said, “this is why I wanted you to be the one with me when I open it. I knew you’d be—”
I cut him off. “While I’m sure the next few words out of your mouth are going to be incredibly sweet, I’m one hundred percent aware that you’re stalling. Open the letter, Toby. Even a rejection is better than putting yourself through this hell. You’ll feel better if you just read it.”
“I know. I—”
“Now.”
He ripped open the envelope, and I realized just how odd this was. He was coming to me with this very personal thing. For support. For encouragement. Back in January, I never would have imagined commanding Toby Tucker to open his acceptance letter. I never would have imagined speaking to him, period.
My, oh my, how things can change.
In the best ways possible, of course.
He slid the paper from the torn envelope with shaking fingers and began to read. I watched his eyes scan the page and widen. Was that joy or heartbreak? Shock, maybe? Surprise that he got in or surprise that he hadn’t?
“Well?”
“I… I was accepted.” Toby dropped the paper and let it float gracefully to the floor. “Bianca, I got in!” He grabbed me by the shoulders and pulled me into him, wrapping his arms around me.
That was something else I never would have expected to happen back in January.
“I told you that you would,” I said, returning the hug.
Over his shoulder, I spotted Casey and Jessica walking across the cafeteria. They were looking at me as they moved through the crowd of students; they saw me wrapped in Toby’s arms. But for some reason the expressions on their faces didn’t mirror the happiness I felt. Jessica looked kind of sad, but Casey… well, she looked downright furious.
Why? What was going on with her? With both of them.
Toby squeezed me before letting go and kneeling down to scoop up his fallen letter. “I can’t believe it. My parents will never believe it.”
I pulled my eyes away from my friends as they vanished behind a group of freshmen and turned my attention back to the beaming boy in front of me. “If they know you at all, Toby, they’ll totally believe it,” I said. “We’ve all known that you’re destined for great things for a long time. I mean, I’ve known for years.”
Toby looked surprised. “Years? But we really didn’t start talking until just a few weeks ago.”
“But we’ve had classes together since we were freshmen,” I reminded him. “We didn’t have to talk for me to know you were awesome.” I gri
“Yeah. Thanks, Bianca.”
As I walked to the double doors, I wondered if I’d said too much. Did I give myself away as a semi-stalker? God, I hoped not. The last thing I wanted was to scare the poor guy away after less than a month of actual human contact. That would really make me a loser.
I was about to push open the door that led to the student parking lot when a loud “Ahem” caught my attention. I turned around and saw Casey leaning against the school’s nearly empty trophy case, her arms crossed over her chest. The way her eyes were narrowed a
“What?” I asked.
She scowled and let her arms fall heavily to her sides. “Nothing,” she grumbled. “Forget it!”
“Casey, what are you—?”
“Not now, B.” She turned around and started stomping away from me. “I have cheer practice.”
My hands flew automatically to my hips. “What the fuck is wrong with you?” I demanded. “You sound like a total bitch.”