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Shocked silence fell between them. Her face was ashen, her lips trembling. His lungs constricted, and he felt as if he were choking. Broken glass lay everywhere, wine and water goblets, shattered pitchers. Shards slicked the floor, brutal ice, the glittering debris of a fractured rainbow life.
He waited for her to fall apart, wanted her to fall apart like he was. Instead, she met his eyes, and through the trembling in her voice, he heard a lifetime of sadness, right along with a toughness he’d never expected. “All right,” she whispered. “All right, then.”
The reality of what he’d said hit home. He didn’t want this. He didn’t want his life broken. He wanted his marriage back, his wife, the woman who’d once looked at him as though he hung the moon and stars. Everything he’d said was true, but where was the relief he should feel at finally getting it off his chest? Where was his old bitterness? He needed it back. He needed to gnaw over the righteousness of his anger so he could justify the broken glass, the shattered marriage.
But he’d waited fourteen years too long to tell her how he felt, and his bitterness had no taste left.
Her breasts rose and fell beneath the soft fabric of her dress. She’d given him everything he’d wanted, everything he’d dreamed of, and instead of treasuring it, he’d just thrown it all back at her.
“I’m so sorry,” she whispered. Her expression was full of compassion and understanding—pain, too, but not the sharp agony he felt. “I’m so very sorry.”
He knew then that he’d screwed everything up, and he had no idea how to make it right. His secret resentment had been the bedrock of their marriage, responsible for her eagerness to please, for his subtle, punitive detachment. But now that resentment had gone up in flames, and he wanted to tell her he loved her. Except she’d never believe the words after everything he’d just hit her with.
His eyes stung. He had to get out of here. He made his way to the door and fumbled with the lock.
She didn’t say a word to keep him with her.
As Sugar Beth came out of the bookstore’s back room, she saw a little boy staring at the Nightingale Woods mobile she’d hung a few hours earlier, part of a promotion for the newest book in the Daphne the Bu
He was the first child who’d ventured into the dimly lit and awkwardly positioned children’s section all morning. “I know I should give it the same attention I give the rest of the store,” Jewel had said when Sugar Beth had asked her about it as they opened up the store that morning. “But I don’t have any passion for selling children’s books. Besides, they haven’t been profitable for me.”
“Not surprising. It’s hardly the most appealing part of the store.”
Jewel had stuck her small nose in the air. “Fine. If you think you’re so smart, you’re the new manager of the children’s book department.”
“There isn’t a children’s book department.”
“And don’t let it interfere with your other work.”
Sugar Beth had gri
Jewel snorted and walked away.
Sugar Beth had to fight the urge to pick up the phone and call Colin with the news. She couldn’t do that kind of thing any longer. The fact that she’d dumped him didn’t prevent him from calling her, however. Generally he used Gordon as an excuse—he’d insisted on sharing custody. Sometimes he called with a question. Did she remember if she’d renewed his Atlantic Monthly subscription? Had she taken his tweed sports coat to the dry cleaner, because he couldn’t find it? She missed him desperately, and sometimes she wished he’d press her for a di
She couldn’t start brooding again, so she turned her attention to her small customer. She was alone in the store, and Jewel would expect her to assist the parent who’d come in with the little boy, but she didn’t. Instead, she followed the direction of his gaze to the fanciful mobile. “Do you like the Daphne books?”
He gave her a wide smile. “Like Be
She gri
“Charlie.”
“Come on then, Charlie.” She sat cross-legged on the floor, deciding right then that they needed to add some small chairs or at least a few pillows. She patted the space next to her, and Charlie settled close.
“Daphne Takes a Tumble, by Molly Somerville.” It was probably Colin’s influence, but shouldn’t children be trained from the begi
“I like this part.” Charlie climbed into her lap, and by the third page, he’d wound his fingers through a lock of her hair.
“. . . Be
“Be
“Splash!” he mimicked.
They finally reached the end of the book, and he turned up his face to give her another of his heart-melting smiles. “You a very good reader.”
“And you a very good listener.”
She sensed a movement off to her right and looked over to see Leea
“Mommy!” Charlie ran to her. “I like Be
“I know you do, punkin’.” Although Leea
“I want book. Please, Mommy.”
“You already have that book.”
“Don’t have that one.” He raced for the display, snatched up the newest book in the series, and carried it back to her. “What’s this say?”
“Victoria Chipmunk and Her Bothersome Baby Brother.”
“Don’t have that one.”
“How much is it?” Leea
Sugar Beth was so disconcerted it took her a moment to find the price. Leea
“Okeydoke.”
“All right. Take it to the register. I’ll be there in a minute.”
He ran off, sneakers thumping on the carpet.
An awkward silence fell. Leea
“That must have been tough.”
“We had some problems. Money’s always been tight. My ex—Andy Perkins—you didn’t know him. He grew up in Tupelo. Anyway, Andy gave me an ultimatum. Either have an abortion or he’d leave me.”
“And you told him not to let the door hit him on his way out?”
Leea
“I’m sure it hasn’t. Charlie’s adorable. Smart, too. He knew just when to turn the pages.”