On the Jellicoe Road

“Naw. You just have to belong. Long to be.”

“By blood?”

“By love,” Narnie said, not looking up.

“Good call,” Webb said to her, proudly.

“Then you’re in, Jude,” Fitz said jumping on him. “Because I love you. I love you, Jude; you’re my hero. Kiss kiss kiss kiss.”

“You wish.” Jude threw him off and they wrestled amongst the leaves good-naturedly. Webb threw himself in and Narnie did, too, her giggling turning into a gurgling laugh as they tickled her.

And Tate just watched and listened and took it all in. “Can you hear that?” she said softly, touching her belly. “Because you belong too.”

Later, they walked back to the road to see Fitz and Jude off. As usual, their goodbyes took longer than the time they had spent together at the clearing. And when the sun had gone down and the trees swayed in the canopy overhead, they parted.

“You never got that fifth tin,” Webb called to Fitz just before they disappeared through the trees.

“Not to worry,” he said with a wave. “I’ll go back for a shot on another day.”

“How come you and Ha

“Ha

Then there’s silence again. Always silence.

“I know who he is, you know. But that’s all I know. And that Webb is dead and that Tate is dying. But there’s more.”

“What else do you need to know, Taylor? I’m your guardian. So is Ha

“And if you had Ha

He takes his eyes off the road. “Without you she felt guilt and remorse and despair and she’d look at me and I knew what she was thinking. That she wished I was her brother or Fitz or Tate. We weren’t supposed to survive, Ha

We drive onto the Jellicoe Road and I feel the presence of the five all around me but more than anything I want to tell Jude Scanlon that he is wrong about what’s going through Ha

“What happened to him?” Griggs asks quietly. “Fitz?”

“He went a bit crazy, on and off,” the Brigadier says after a while. “Met a sweet girl, had a kid, and then the girl died. Cancer. And I think Fitz thought that everything he touched died, so he went into self-imposed exile, like he wanted to remove himself from his kid in case he cursed her in some way. But the thing about Fitz, and Tate, too, is that they loved their baby girls and they couldn’t let go. But one day when he couldn’t take the demons in his head any longer…”

He doesn’t finish the sentence. He doesn’t have to.

“What about his kid?” I ask. “We should find her.”

But suddenly a fire truck whizzes past us and then another and then another.

“What the hell was that?” I ask, straining my eyes to see. The Brigadier puts on his high beams but turns them off instantly. Coming our way are two more sets of headlights.

“What’s happening?” Griggs says. “Why would people be on the road at this time of the night?”

A third car drives by as we pass the only light on the Jellicoe Road. I see a face pressed up against one of the back windows, a face so small and frightened that it sends a wave of shock through me that almost paralyses me. It’s the face of one of my year sevens.

“The school,” I whisper. “I think it’s burning down.”

Chapter 25

There is a sick feeling in my stomach when we reach the driveway of the school. I know my world is about to come apart and it renders me so weak I can barely breathe. At another time I would have marvelled at the colour. The blaze is spectacular; and there are slivers of light coming from trucks and cars and floodlights and spi

The Brigadier brings the car to a sudden halt. I yank open the door and hit the ground ru

I help the girls into any of the jackets or jumpers given to us by the other houses. Three of the year sevens don’t move and I kneel in front of them.

“I want you to go with these people. They’ll take care of you. Tomorrow I’ll come and get you. Every one of you. I promise. I swear on the holy bible.”

They look at me and nod, clutching my hand, their mouths quivering, tears spilling, sobs bursting out, like machine guns of grief, creating their own carnage of despair.

“We couldn’t get to them,” one of them whispers. “They were in the back room where all our junk is. One of them ran there when everything started going up. But I saw them. I saw them both and they couldn’t get to us and we couldn’t get to them and then the whole thing just—”

“Who?” I ask, trying to keep the horror out of my voice.

“…and she was saying, ‘Don’t worry’…and then everything collapsed and she was repeating, ‘Don’t worry, my father…my father…my father…’ What did she always used to say about her father, Taylor? I can’t remember anymore.”

I feel someone put a blanket around me but I don’t turn around to see who it is. I hold on to these three kids until one of the Townie parents comes to take them away. Then I see Raffy standing next to Ms. Morris, who is looking completely bewildered. For one moment my life goes back to the way it was half an hour ago. My heart beats at a regular pace. I make my way towards them, watching Raffy’s manic movements as she scribbles stuff down on a sheet of paper. When she looks up, I almost don’t recognise her. It’s like I’ve been away for one million years and the world has changed.

“I’ve got all their names down,” she says to me and Ms. Morris in that practical tone of hers. “I’ve written down T if they’ve gone to the town or the House name if they’ve gone there. See. So we can keep count and we’ll know where to find them all later.”

I can’t read the list because her hand is shaking so much. We look at each other and I nod because I can’t speak.

“I’ve got all the phone numbers as well,” she says.

“How many are missing?” I manage to ask.

“Two.”

I hear my gasping and I think, Not now, Taylor. Not everything is about your inability to breathe under pressure.

“Show me the list.” I wheeze.

But she shakes her head over and over again. “Wait until everyone’s here, Taylor. Just two more names and everyone will be here. Everyone.”

I look over at the House as it continues to burn. I look at the fire fighters hovering outside.