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I wasn’t sure what he wanted me to say, and from the looks of it, no one in the room felt inclined to help me out. “Um . . . it is my birthday. What else would I be doing up here?”
Aiden looked shell shocked. “My mom said you and Grayson came up here today, and I just thought . . .”
Grayson walked up next to me. “You thought I brought her up here alone.” He laughed one hard, humorless laugh. “You thought I was going to try to get her to sleep with me?” He put his arm over my shoulder. He was so tense I wondered if he was using me to hold himself back from throwing punches. “I can’t believe you thought I would do that to Avery.”
Aiden glared at Grayson while I pieced together a realization of my own. “You came up here to stop me. Because you were so sure I’d just jump right into bed with him the minute he tried to seduce me.”
Aiden looked away from me, shame all over his face. A pain I’d come to recognize as the feel of Aiden Ke
“Can we go upstairs and talk in private please?”
“No, we can’t.”
My answer was sharp and came out of nowhere. I felt Grayson stiffen in surprise next to me. I put my arm around his waist—so glad he was there to help hold me up. I had this really strange feeling forming in the pit of my stomach. It wasn’t my familiar panic, and that scared me.
“I can’t believe you would think that about me,” I said.
Aiden seemed to get angry. “Of course I was worried about you! I know my brother, Avery. He’s the master and you’re so . . . so . . .”
“I’m so what?”
My voice sounded strange. I wasn’t sure what was going on with me.
Grayson must have realized something was off too, because the hand that he’d had over my shoulders was now gently rubbing my back in a slow, soothing ma
“I
“And so you assumed that I would just give it up to your brother because he was the first guy who ever showed interest in me?”
“Red alert! Red Alert!” Brandon muttered somewhere to the left of me. “Stage five here we come.”
I heard the chime of a video camera being turned on and Levi whispered, “Systems are a go. We are about to witness science in action. After weeks of no progress, A.S.E. test subject Avery Shaw is finally about to emerge from her guilt and experience the fifth stage of grief. Just as her lab partner predicted, it looks to be an explosive scene.”
“Do you guys mind?” I snapped at them. I turned back to Aiden. “Do you think I’m that insecure?” I asked him in a tight voice. “That desperate?”
Aiden sighed. “It’s not just that, Aves.” He raked his hands through his hair in frustration. “You’ve been so vulnerable lately.”
“Tell me he did not just say that,” Libby said.
I think it was Owen who chuckled and replied, “She’s going to tear him a new one.”
I couldn’t be bothered with the commentary. I felt my face turn red, and for the first time in my life, it wasn’t because I was blushing.
“And why might I be feeling vulnerable lately, Aiden? Whose fault would that be?” Aiden flinched. “Not that it’s any of your business, but Grayson hasn’t been trying to take advantage of me. He’s been bending over backwards to help me.”
Aiden’s hands clenched into fists. “Yeah, I saw how he was trying to help you.”
That was it. I just snapped. “You have no idea what you saw! That kiss was a dumb science experiment! Grayson agreed to be my partner for the science fair after you quit on me!”
“An experiment?” Aiden scoffed. “What kind of experiment would require you to kiss somebody?”
I marched over to my backpack and yanked my science journal from it. We’d turned so many things into experiments that I’d taken to carrying the book with me everywhere. Without giving it a thought, I chucked the stupid thing right at Aiden’s head.
“This one you jerk! I’m trying to find the stupid cure to a broken heart!”
My journal plastered him right in the face. He stumbled back, shocked. He picked up the book, leafed through a few pages, and then popped like a balloon—his anger completely gone.
He might have been finished yelling, but I was just getting started. “You broke me, Aiden! Not just my heart, but every single part of me! Grayson just happened to be there when I shattered and was kind enough to pick up the pieces. He’s been there for me every step of the way! He’s just trying to help me get over you!”
For a minute it was so silent that I think everyone in the room must have been holding their breath.
“Aves . . .” Aiden whispered in a strangled voice.
The intimacy in the way he said my name felt like another stab wound. “Don’t call me that!” I hissed. “Only people who really care about me can call me that!”
“Aves, I do care about you. You’re my best fri—”
“Don’t you dare say that! I am not your best friend! I have been nothing to you since winter break.”
“That’s not true.”
“You cut me completely out of your life! You’ve barely spoken two words to me in weeks. You made me feel guilty for trying to support you. You forced me to sit away from my friends at lunch!”
“I did not! You left with Grayson!”
“Because you were going to ask me to leave! Weren’t you!”
Aiden shrunk back like a puppy being scolded for chewing shoes.
I managed to lower my voice a little. “You couldn’t even stand to be near me. I was your best friend for seventeen years, and just like that, you got a girlfriend and forgot all about me.”
“No!” Aiden shook his head frantically. “I didn’t, Aves. That’s why I broke up with Mindy. We got in a huge fight after you came to my debate. She told me I had to choose, so I did. I chose you Avery.”
It was everything I’d wanted to hear since he dumped me in almost this exact spot six weeks ago. Fu
“Aves, come on. Don’t do this. I know I screwed up—I screwed up huge—but we can get past it. I’ll do whatever it takes to make it up to you. You’re not nothing to me. You’re everything. I was just so close to you that I couldn’t see it.”
And finally, my anger was gone too. I was done. Probably for the rest of my life.
“That’s real sweet, Aiden,” I said in a dead voice. “But you shouldn’t have come here. I think it’s upsetting Grayson, and you’re kind of ruining my birthday party.”
Aiden sucked in a breath, no doubt recognizing those words. They were more or less the same ones he’d said to me at his debate. Now he knew what it felt like.
“I’m sorry, Aiden, but I’d like you to leave please.”
I recognized the look of a person’s heart breaking. I’d never seen it from this perspective before, but I was familiar with it enough to know that’s what was happening to Aiden right then.
He didn’t say another word to anyone. He just got up and quietly left. The moment the door shut behind him, I graduated from stage five and spiraled straight on into depression.
Grayson
I thought it would feel good to watch Avery finally tell off my brother, only that wasn’t the case at all. In reality it sucked. He totally deserved it, and, yes, part of me was more than satisfied when she’d thrown the book at him—literally—but I knew it hurt her to do it, and that I didn’t like watching.
The only way to describe Avery after her fight with Aiden was tired. I’d expected one of her stress attacks. I thought she’d break into hysteric sobs the minute he left, but she just seemed exhausted. She didn’t shed a single tear. I was proud of her for that.
Her body sagged against mine, and for one long minute she buried her face in my chest, soaking up my comfort while I held her. Just about the time I expected one of her anxiety attacks to take over, she pulled her face back just far enough to look up at me and asked, “You don’t really expect me to wear that swimsuit, do you?”