Ruin

“—a total rush. Holy shit, it’s almost like we’re out here getting high.” My eyes widened in excitement.

“Thank you, Wes.” Damn, but I would never tire from those breathless lips as they said my name. “Thank you for not thinking I’m crazy.”

“Ah, we’re all a bit crazy, don’t you think?”

“Yeah.” She sighed. “Especially us.”

“I’m going to kiss you now,” I warned as my mouth collided with hers. Our tongues twisted, and I pulled her back into the water with me, floating backward as her legs wrapped around my waist. My body flared to life as her breasts pressed against my chest. Groaning in frustration, I reached for the string of her swimsuit, telling myself it was okay to be the guy I used to be, the guy that would screw her brains out without a second thought.

But I hesitated. My hand hovered over the strings as if my fingers had forgotten how to pull loose a girl’s swimsuit with one hand.

“Wes?” My dad called. “You guys out here?”

I cursed and gently pushed Kiersten away, linking my hands with hers as I yelled back. “In the pool.”

He rounded the corner and smiled, understanding washed over his face. “I, uh, hope I’m not interrupting anything.”

“Not at all,” I said too quickly.

“Right.” He chuckled. “Um, I need to talk to you about something, Wes. The school called and—” He looked behind me to Kiersten. “You know, we can talk later. Why don’t you kids get out and grab some hot coffee. I DVR’d the Thanksgiving Day Parade just in case you’d want to watch it.”

“Yes!” Kiersten shouted from behind me. “I haven’t seen the parade in years!”

“Great.” Dad smiled and gave me that knowing look, the one that said you better not screw this up with your bullshit. I smiled back, the smile every son gives to his father when he wants to remind him that he’s a grown man and not a little kid anymore.

“Let’s go.” I grabbed Kiersten’s hand and kissed it. “We can ski

Chapter Thirty-Four

Had I lost my ever loving mind? Wes teaches me to swim, and I basically throw myself at him in his pool. Oh gosh, imagine what’s going to happen when we bungee jump, I’m probably going to try to peel his clothes off as we fall.

Kiersten

I changed and went downstairs to meet Wes, but he hadn't made it down yet. It was already one in the afternoon. Melda had everything set up for di

Pouting hadn’t brought them back.

Crying didn’t make me feel better.

Hiding in my room hadn’t made the pain go away.

But living — living had been my salvation, just like Wes. He was like my own personal life coach — only I was afraid I was falling too hard and fast to find my way back. I pushed away that thought — we liked each other, that was all that mattered. If I looked too far into the future I would over-think things. After all, I was only eighteen. I didn’t want to get married.

Holy crap! Was I thinking about marriage already?

See? This was why girls needed other girlfriends to reign them in. I momentarily thought about calling Lisa, but that girl was anything but the voice of reason. She’d probably drive me to Vegas if I asked her.

My finger hovered over the phone, just as I gained enough courage to dial Gabe’s number, the phone lit up.

It was him.

“Hey,” I answered. “I was just going to call you.”

I waited on the living room couch for Wes to show up and twirled my hair in my fingers.

“Sure you were,” Gabe said, laughing. “I was just calling to make sure you were still alive. I heard you went for a swim.”

“How?” I gasped. “That was only forty minutes ago.”

“Someone’s boyfriend called to update me on the adventures of Kiersten.” I could practically see Gabe’s smug grin in my mind as he spoke. “And he wanted me to be the first to give you a high five for being brave.”

“Swimming isn’t brave,” I whined. “I feel like a five-year-old.”

“I wore water wings until I was fourteen,” Gabe said dryly. “What you did was brave.”

“Fourteen?” I repeated.

“I had a minor shark phobia.”

“In a pool?”

“We aren’t talking about me.” Gabe changed the subject. “How goes the fairy tale, Cinderella?”

“It goes well.” I sighed happily into the phone. “He’s perfect, I mean, it’s perfect. I feel good. Too good, almost like something bad has to happen or something, you know?”

Gabe grew really quiet.

“Gabe?”

“Yeah, I’m here.” He cursed softly. “Just thinking. Look, I gotta go, but do yourself a favor? Don’t over-think things. Just enjoy having the richest twenty-one-year-old in the world at your beck and call, kiss him goodnight, and savor the moments you guys have together.”

“Huh?”

“You know…” Gabe cleared his throat. “Before school starts again.”

“Oh right, next week, school. I almost forgot, thanks for bringing me some early Christmas cheer.”

“I did work at the mall as an elf once.”

“Pictures?”

“All destroyed in a tragic fire that only ended up burning that one section of my room — odd really.” He laughed. “Now, go have fun, I’ll see you Monday okay?”

“Fine!”

“Oh, and don’t forget, you’re going shopping for a homecoming dress with Lisa. She’ll freak if you forget.”

“Got it.”

Wes walked into the room. I hung up the phone not even realizing I hadn’t said goodbye until it was too late.

“Tattle tale.” I narrowed my eyes as Wes i

“I thought you needed another cheerleader on your team, that’s all.” His face looked a bit sunken. Dark shadows were begi

“Are you feeling okay?” I asked, touching my hand to his forehead.

“Sure.” His smile was tight.

“Wes,” I warned. “Seriously?”

He sighed. “Fine, I don’t feel one hundred percent, but the good news is we’re spending the rest of the afternoon watching movies and eating, and I have nakedness to look forward to later, so there is that to live for.”

“So you’re basically only living for two things? Food and sex?”

“Sounds about right, though I’m only living for food… living for sex just seems so—”

“Like Gabe?” I offered.

“Touché.” Wes gri

I felt my cheeks heat with embarrassment. With a desperate sigh he lifted my chin with his hand and kissed my lips briefly. “I like you a lot, you know that, right?”

I nodded, not trusting myself to speak, because really all I wanted to know was why he wasn’t that guy anymore. Furthermore, was there something wrong with me that made me defective? Why wouldn’t he want that with me? I mean, I wasn’t even sure I was ready, I just wanted to know I was desirable in that way, to him.

“Don’t give me that look.” Wes sighed. “My self control isn’t all that saintly right now. In fact, I may have to lock you in your room tonight and throw away the key. It’s not for lack of wanting you.” He grabbed my hands and kissed the insides of my wrists. “It’s because I want you too much — I care way too damn much — so just accept the fact that it would be a bad sign if I threw you against the wall or the ground or the table. Hell, I’ve had that fantasy for days now. You by the turkey.” He winked and wrapped his arm around my shoulders. “I want you, but it has to be right. And right now? It’s too new. Get it?”