Covet

28

daniel

I watch Claire drive away.

I can’t believe I asked her to go for a ride with me. It was easily the most impulsive thing I’ve done in a long time, and the words came out before I could stop them.

I’m never impulsive. Cops rarely are. We think things through, look at the situation from all angles before we proceed. We don’t charge into the unknown. Doing that will get you killed.

She sounded lonely. That’s the only reason I can come up with for why I asked her if she wanted to go for a ride with me.

It’s also the only reason I can come up with for why she said yes.

It doesn’t matter if I think she’s sweet. That she’s easy to talk to. That I’ve always thought that there’s nothing prettier than a brown-eyed blonde.

The most we could ever be is friends, because it’s definitely not my style to mess with another man’s wife.

Especially since he never seems to be around.

29

claire

I’m sitting in the backyard with Bridget almost a week later, watching the kids run around after di

I probably shouldn’t be having a conversation with him at all.

“Claire. Did you hear me?” Bridget asks, giving me a poke.

“No, sorry. What did you say?”

“I was wondering if you could run Gage and Griffin to soccer practice tomorrow. Sebastian and Fi

“It’s no problem, Bridget,” I say, nodding. “I can help you.”

“Thanks. I don’t know what I’d do without you and Elisa sometimes.”

“You’ve helped Elisa and me out plenty of times,” I say.

“Not nearly as much as you’ve both helped me,” she says.

I smile and say, “You’ve got more kids than we do. You’re entitled.”

Later, when Josh and Jordan are in bed, I listen to his voice mail. “Hey, Claire. It’s Daniel. I’m off tomorrow and I’m taking the bike out. Let me know if you want to come with me.”

It’s been five days since I went to Daniel’s house, and the guilt I felt about enjoying his company has faded a bit, like the colors of an old photograph. Or maybe I’ve just rationalized it away: Nothing happened. He was just being friendly.

He’s a nice guy and I have no reason to believe that his intentions are anything less than honorable. But agreeing to see him again is going to send a mixed signal, and at thirty-four I’m way too old to be a tease. I take the easy way out and text him my response. I’m sorry. I can’t. Thank you for asking though. Best, Claire.

He responds thirty seconds later. No problem. Thanks, Daniel.

His reply tells me that he got the message loud and clear.

It’s too bad, because I would have really liked to go for another ride.

I get into bed, turn on the TV, and flip aimlessly through the cha

And remind myself that I made the right choice.

 • • •

I’m sitting at a stoplight in front of the credit union at eleven thirty the next morning. A man who looks a lot like Bridget’s husband, Sam, is walking up the sidewalk in front of the building. I’m just far enough away that I can’t be sure. He has the same stocky build and dark hair as Sam, but he’s wearing jeans and a gray sweatshirt. The driver behind me honks his horn and I look up and see that the light has turned green.

Later that day, when I’m driving Gage and Griffin to soccer practice I decide I must have been mistaken. The man walking into the credit union couldn’t have been Sam. The whole reason I’m helping Bridget out is because Sam’s at an all-day meeting downtown. Instead of jeans he’s probably wearing a three-piece suit and trying to one-up his peers.

It sure looked like him, though.

30

claire

I’m weaving through the late-afternoon traffic, trying to make it home before the kids are dropped off by their respective carpools. The thumping starts as I’m mentally reviewing my to-do list and thinking about what to make for di

“Hi, Claire,” she says. “What’s up?”

“I’ve got a flat tire,” I say. “Josh and Jordan will be home in twenty minutes. Can you meet them and take them to your house?”

“Sure, no problem. What are you going to do about the tire?”

“I don’t know yet.” In the past I’d called AAA, but that was one of the things I canceled when I was going through our expenses, eliminating everything I thought we could live without, no matter how little it cost. When I told Chris he was livid. “What if you and the kids get stuck on the side of the road? Jesus, Claire. I don’t think AAA is going to break the bank.” I give silent thanks that the kids aren’t with me and mentally reprimand myself; we really didn’t save that much by dropping the service, and perhaps I was a bit militant in my efforts to save us from financial ruin.

“Skip will be back in an hour,” Elisa says. “I can send him.”

“Thanks, but I’ll try my dad first.” I call my parents but the phone rings and rings. They should be sitting in the kitchen eating di

I don’t want to try to change the tire myself. My i