Shrapnel: Fragments from the Inner Sphere

As quietly as possible, I clambered up onto the roof. Crossing to the far edge. I leaped across to the neighboring building. Constantly watching my backtrail, and using all the evasion skills drilled into me at the Nagelring, I moved into Akumashima and lost myself among the Untouchables.

The soot from the explosion and the grime I'd picked up scrambling over roofs and through alleys completed the disguise I'd originally tried to create with my mustache Shoving my hands into the pockets of my fatigue pants. I set my face in the hard sort of look that I hoped said, ‘Mess with me and regret it.’ Moving through the milling crowd of sawararenai,I glared at people who got in my way, and snarled at those who actually bumped into me.

Shuffling along, occasionally looking back over my shoulder, I fit right in with the rest of the outlaws and outcasts that made up the dregs of Hakkinshi. As I watched those around me, I realized, perhaps for the first time, how different was my life as a MechWarrior from that of most of the other people within the Successor States.

Even taking into account the cultural differences between the Lyran Commonwealth and the Draconis Combine, the quality of life on Murchison was much different from what I saw as normal Arc-Royal, the world where I'd grown up, was a beautiful blue-green ball. Forests and fields covered it and the soil was incredibly fertile. The introduction of xenobiological and senobiological projects had been strictly controlled so that our people could make a living producing grains and animal products for export without destroying the natural ecology.

My family was nobility on Arc-Royal. My grandfather was the world's Duke and my father, as a Count, governed a large island continent. Even so, the relaxed pace of life on Arc-Royal and the Kell family's tradition of hard work meant that my brother and I both pulled our own weight. Working side by side with the people on our farms, I learned that we Humans are alike, no matter what our station.

But I'd wanted to be a MechWarrior for as long as I could remember, a desire that increased when my brother vanished for a year just after graduation from the Nagelring. Then the Nagelring accepted me and I worked hard to graduate with honors. I wanted the MechWarrior's life of excitement and danger because l truly felt there was no better way to live.

A MechWarrior's existence is a strange one. Someone once called it sheer boredom punctuated by moments of sheer terror, but I think that may be a bit harsh. It's true, but there are other times when you earn the respect of an enemy, And there are times when you have to mourn a fallen friend.

As the singsong voices of merchants beckoned and cajoled the passers by. I realized that a MechWarrior misses out on huge chunks of life. All the people around me had worries that I would consider mundane. They had to work for their meals and clothes and homes, things I took for granted because the Regiment provided them for me. They had to wake up each morning and decide what they would do during the day, and what the consequences of their action would be. Me, I had orders and if I didn't follow them, I'd be thrown into jail. Though my life as a MechWarrior might be more constraining, it also served as a safety net to keep me from failing.

The people down here, and in every village or town or city throughout the Successor States, didn't care about who ruled what. The grand galactic game of war and politics only touched them when it stole a child or caused the government to change the faces printed on their money.

In that instant, I also realized what someone like the Little Dragon meant to the people of Akumashima. She was theirsafety net, making sure that whoever controlled the world of Murchison did not disrupt the life in Akumashima. When we blew the opium barge apart, she made certain those who needed the drug got it. whatever the cost to her.

My mind drifted to her gold renketsu,and I shivered. Whata way to live,I thought, then felt angry at myself. Who are you to judge her? She follows orders just like you do. but her orders come from her sense of right and wrong, not from the mouth of whoever pays the bills.

‘I know.’ I mumbled to myself, ‘but someone with that much heart deserves more and better.’ The moment those words came to me, I realized that something about Takara had gotten under my skin. Yes, I found her physically attractive, but that wasn't really it. I sensed something else that could bind us together, then realized my weariness and the mission's pressure had undoubtedly warped my perceptions to a dangerous degree.

Uneasy about spending too much time on the street, I slipped into a ramshackle restaurant offering biiru to baka.I chose a dark booth in the corner far from the door. When a serving girl inquired, I ordered the house special. The beer arrived warm and the noodles cold.

The beer, which tasted like something between swamp water and 'Mech coolant, cut the dust and soot from my throat. I leaned back in the booth and shut my eyes. O.K., Duke Michael, how do I i