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“Yes, sir.” Clearly things had gone on beyond his comprehension. He didn’t know what kind of an agreement might have hammered his cousin loose from Pell’s courts. He understood that, along with all other Rules, the situation with Pell might have changed.
“So how far has the rumor spread?” James Robert asked him.
On Jeremy’s two feet? Counting the conspicuous dress? “I think the rumor is traveling, sir, at least among the crew. It came to me and I came here. Others might know by now. I’d be surprised if they didn’t.”
“Jeremy.”
“Yes, sir.”
“Let a crew liberty without a five-hour check-in and they think the universe has changed. Drunken on the docks, I take it, when this news met you.”
“No, sir. Fruit juice in a vid parlor.”
The Old Man could laugh. It started as a disturbance in the lines near his eyes and traveled slowly to the edges of the mouth. Just the edges. And faded again.
“Life and death, junior captain. Ultimately all decisions are life and death. It’s on your watch. Do you have any objections? Say them now.”
“Yes, sir,” he said somberly. “I understand that it’s on my watch.”
“The generations were broken,” James Robert said. “From my generation to yours there was birth and death. There was a continuity—and it’s broken. I want that restored , Jamie.”
“Yes, sir,” he said.
“You still haven’t a chart, have you?”
“Sir?”
“You’re in deep space without a chart. We didn’t entirely get you home.”
He understood that the Old Man was speaking figuratively, this business about charts, about deep space, expressions which might have been current in the Old Man’s youth, a century and more ago.
“Too much war,” James Robert said. The man who, himself, had begun the War, talked about charts and coming home. About charts for a new situation, JR guessed. But home? Where was that, except the ship?
The Old Man got up and he got up. Then the Old Man, still taller than most of them, set his hand on his shoulder, a touch he hadn’t felt since he was, what?
Ten. The day his mother had died—along with half of Finity’s crew.
“Too many dead,” the Old Man said. “You’ll not crew this ship with hire-ons when you command her. You’ll run short-handed, you’ll marry spacers in, but you’ll never let hire-ons sit station on this ship, hear me, Jamie?”
The Old Man’s grip was still hard. There was still fire in him. He still could send that fire into what he touched. It trembled through his nerves. “Yes, sir,” he said faintly, intimately, as the Old Man dealt with him.
“I’ve given you one of your cousins back. I’ve agreed to Quen’s damned ship-building. It was time to agree. It’s time to do different things. Time for you, too. You’re young yet. You—and this lost cousin of ours—will see things and make choices far beyond my century and a half.”
“Yes, sir.” He didn’t know what the Old Man was aiming at with this talk of crewing the ship, and building ships for Quen of Pell. But not understanding James Robert was nothing new. Even Madison failed to know what was on the Old Man’s mind, sometimes, and damned sure their enemies had misjudged what James Robert would do next, or what his resources were.
“Making peace,” the Old Man said, “isn’t signing treaties. It’s getting on with life. It’s making things work , and not finding excuses for living in the past. Time to get on with life, Jamie.”
The Old Man asked, and the crew performed. It wasn’t love. It was Family. And Family forever included that gaping, aching blank where a generation had failed to be born and half of them who were born had died. It was the Old Man reaching out across those years of conflict and training for conflict—and saying to their generation, Make peace.
Make peace.
God, with what? With a station obsessed with games and dinosaurs? With Union more unpredictable as an ally than it had been as an enemy?
That prospect seemed suddenly terrifying in its unknowns, more so than the War that had grown familiar as an old suit of clothes. The universe, like his whole generation, was in fragments and ruin.
And the Old Man said, without saying a word, Do this new thing, Jamie. Go into this peace and do something different than you’ve ever imagined in the day you command .
He was back on that cliff again. Jump off, was James Robert’s clear advice. Try something different than he’d ever known.
And to start the process, of all chancy gifts, the Old Man gave him the new Old Rules and a rescued cousin who wasn’t any damn use to the ship except the bare fact that getting Fletcher back closed books, saved the Name, prevented another disaster in Pell courts.
And maybe redeemed a promise, a loose end the Old Man had left hanging. Francesca herself had shattered, lost herself in a fantasy of drugs. But she’d kept her kid alive and under her guardianship, always believing, by that one act, that they’d come back.
Now they had. Maybe that was what the Old Man was saying, his message to Pell, to everyone around them.
They’d come back. They’d kept the ship alive. They’d survived the War. And no one had ever believed they’d do that much.
Chapter 5
There was no chance to slip into the domes u
“Ran out of cylinder” Fletcher began his story before Bianca had to say a thing. “It was my fault. I left my saw.” They weren’t supposed to leave power tools where hisa could get them in their hands. Responsible behavior was at issue. “We went back after it and ran low on time. Somebody must have taken it on in. Sorry.”
The rain made a deafening lot of noise. The mask hid all expression. The man from Staff Admin waved a hand toward the women’s dorm.“Get in out of the rain,” he told Bianca. Then: “Neihart, you come with me.”
It clearly wasn’t the casual dismissal of the case he’d hoped for. It didn’t sound even like the forms and reports to fill out that led to a minor reprimand. The staffer led him toward the Administration dome.
So they nabbed him as responsible and sent the Family girl off without a reprimand. He was both glad they had put the responsibility on him—he’d talked Bianca into going out there—and resentful of a system settling down on him with familiar force. He figured he was on his own now, in more serious trouble than he’d bargained for, and as he walked he calmly settled his story straight in his head, the sequence, the way it had to work to make everything logical. He’d done no harm. He could maintain that for a fact. He had hope of calming things down if he just kept his head.
They walked in through the doors, out of the rain. And the senior staffer—the name was Richards, but he didn’t remember the rest—waved him through to the interview room, where you could deal with Admin without going through decon, if you didn’t have long business there. It was a room where you could go in and talk to someone through a clean-screen, or apply for a new breather-cylinder, or fill out paperwork.
Left alone there, he sat on one of the two hard plastic chairs, rather than appear to pace or fret: he was onto psychs with pinhole cameras. He knew the tricks. He sat calmly and wove himself a vivid, convincing memory of seeing a team member by the river when the rain started, a stand of trees that was real close to the water, where somebody could get cut off by rising water.
Yes, he’d been stupid in leaving the saw: if you were dealing with administrators, you always had to admit to some little point where you’d been stupid and you could promise you’d never do that again, so they’d be happy and authoritative. They could say he’d learned a lesson—he had—and he’d be off the hook. He’d learned a long time ago how to make people in charge of him go off with a warm glow, having Saved him yet again and having Made Progress with their problem child. He had the mental script all made out by the time the director walked in from the other side of the transparent divider and sat down, sour-faced, on the other side of the desk.