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She touched her friend on the shoulder and, mindful of her Egyptian observer, said softly, ―Let‘s take a walk.‖
The observer made to follow them, but stopped at a subtle hand sign from Chalthoum. Outside, the desert light was blinding, even with sunglasses, but the heat was clean, the arid spice of the desert, the murderous sun a welcome respite from the death pit into which they‘d both sunk. Coming home to the desert, Soraya thought, was like returning to a longed-for lover: The sand whispered against your skin in intimate caress. In the desert you could see things coming at you. Which was why people like Amun lied, because the desert told the truth, always, in the history it covered and uncovered, in the bones of civilization from which the eternal sand had scoured away all lies. Too much truth, people like Amun believed, was a terrible thing, because it left you nothing to believe in, nothing to live for. She knew she understood him far better than he understood her. He believed otherwise, of course, but that was a useful delusion for him to hold close.
―Delia, what‘s really going on?‖ Soraya asked when they‘d plodded some distance away from the al Mokhabarat sentries.
―Nothing I can substantiate at the moment.‖ She looked around to make sure they were alone. Seeing Chalthoum staring after them, she said, ―That man is creeping me out.‖
Soraya moved them farther away from the Egyptian‘s penetrating gaze.
―Don‘t worry, he can‘t overhear what we say. What‘s on your mind?‖
―Fucking sun.‖ Squinting behind her sunglasses, Delia used her hands to shadow her face. ―My lips are going to peel off before the night is over.‖
Soraya waited while the sun continued to throb in the sky and Delia‘s lips continued to burn.
―Fuck it,‖ Delia said at last. ―Five to two the crash wasn‘t caused by something inside the aircraft.‖ She was an inveterate poker player; every situation was a matter of odds. She often transformed nouns into verbs, too.
―I instinct a particular explosive.‖
―So it was no accident.‖ Soraya‘s blood ran cold. ―You ruled out a bomb so, what, an air-to-air missile?‖
Delia shrugged. ―Could be, but you read the transcript of the flight crew‘s last conversation with the tower at Cairo International. They saw no sign of a jet coming up on them.‖
―What about from underneath or behind?‖
―Sure, but then the radar would‘ve picked it up. Besides, according to the copilot, he saw something smaller even than a private jet coming up on them.‖
―But only at the last possible instant. The explosion took place before he had time to describe what it was.‖
―If you‘re right, that leads us toward a ground-to-air missile.‖
Delia nodded. ―If we get lucky the black box will be intact, and its recorder might tell us more.‖
―When?‖
―You saw what a mess it is in there. It‘s going to take a while to ascertain whether it‘s even retrievable.‖
Soraya said in the dry, ominous whisper of the hot wind that reshapes the dunes, ―A ground-to-air missile would bring an entire universe of very nasty possibilities into play.‖
―I know,‖ Delia said. ―Such as the involvement, either complicit or implicit, of the Egyptian government.‖
Soraya couldn‘t help but turn to look at Chalthoum. ―Or al Mokhabarat.‖
6
MOIRA AWOKE to the ticking of her mother‘s heart. It was as loud as a grandfather clock and it terrified her. For a moment she lay in a fury of darkness, reliving the blur of sound and motion as the paramedics came, took her mother off to the hospital, all seen through a haze of tears. That was the last time she saw her mother alive. She never had a chance to say good-bye; instead, the last words she‘d said to her were ―I hate your guts. Why don‘t you stay out of my life!‖ All of a sudden her mother was dead. Moira was seventeen.
Then the pain set in and she began screaming.
The ticking was real; it was, in fact, the sound of the over-revved engine cooling. Hands were pulling at her, cutting through the web of her seat belt, the flaccid cloud of the air bag. As if in a dream, she felt her body moving, the drag of gravity settling in her shoulder and the pit of her stomach. Her head felt as if it had been split open; she was nauseated with pain. Then, with a crash that reverberated through the cotton in her ears, she was out of her steel cage. She felt the night air soft on her cheek, and there were voices near her, buzzing like angry insects.
Her mother… the hospital waiting room, stinking of disinfectant and despair… the sight of the wax doll in the open coffin, horrifying in its inhuman lack of animation… at the cemetery, the yellow sky reeking of coal gas and sorrow… the ground swallowing the coffin whole, like a beast closing its jaws… clods of newly turned earth damp with rain and tears…
Awareness returned to her slowly, like a fog creeping over a moor, and then, with the sudde
―Jay,‖ she said into the face of the paramedic bent over her. ―Is Jay all right?‖
―Who‘s Jay?‖ a voice out of her field of vision said.
―There was no one else in your car.‖ The paramedic had a kind face. He looked too young for this kind of work.
―Not my car,‖ she managed. ―The one in front.‖
―Oh, jeez,‖ came the voice at her side.
The kind face above her split in sorrow. ―Your friend… Jay. He didn‘t make it.‖
Tears leaked from the corners of Moira‘s eyes. ―Oh, hell,‖ she said. ―Oh, damn.‖
They began to work on her again, and she said, ―I want to sit up.‖
―That wouldn‘t be a good idea, ma‘am,‖ the kind face said. ―You‘re in shock and—‖
―I‘m sitting up,‖ Moira said, ―with or without your help.‖
With hands under her arms, he drew her up. She was in the street, next to her car. When she tried to look around, she winced and lights exploded behind her eyes.
―Get me to my feet,‖ she said through gritted teeth. ―I need to see him.‖
―Ma‘am—‖
―Is anything broken?‖
―No, ma‘am, but—‖
―Then get me to my goddamn feet!‖
There were two of them now, the second one improbably looking younger than the first.