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A low, anxious hissing filled the room. One by one, the Arconans followed Si Treemba.
Chapter 16
The meeting ended in stalemate. There was nothing left to do but leave. Obi-Wan stayed with Qui-Gon. Although the Jedi held himself erect during the confrontation, sweat beaded his forehead and Obi-Wan could only imagine the concentration it took for him to stay focused.
“I’ll see you back to your cabin,” Obi-Wan told him. He knew Qui-Gon must be feeling weak when the Jedi didn’t try to argue.
By the time Qui-Gon reached the corridor where his cabin was located, his walk was uneven and his vision clouded. He was grateful for Obi-Wan’s presence at his side. As he rounded the corner, he staggered. Obi-Wan grabbed his arm and held him upright.
“Are you all right?” Obi-Wan asked, his voice thick with concern.
“I will be,” Qui-Gon said weakly. “I… just need… to focus.”
Obi-Wan helped him into his cabin and waited until he was seated. A plan had been growing in his mind since the confrontation. This time, he would not make the mistake of failing to inform Qui-Gon.
“Master Ji
Qui-Gon closed his eyes for a moment, as if Obi-Wan’s suggestion had pained him as much as his wound. “No,” he said flatly. “You will not.”
Just moments ago, he had been impressed by Obi-Wan’s handling of the Arconan situation, and how he had backed off from Jemba with dignity. Now the boy was making reckless plans again, letting his eagerness take over his judgement.
Of course, Qui-Gon had to admit the plans were no more reckless than some of those that Qui-Gon had thought up in his youth. Still, he felt a disappointment so keen that it surprised him. Were his feelings continually to take him unaware when it came to the boy?
Wearily, Qui-Gon raised himself up in the chair. His shoulder flamed where the pirate had struck him. He’d been holding that pain at bay, but now it overwhelmed him.
“Look, you’re wounded,” Obi-Wan said. “I know you can’t fight now. But I could do it for you! I can hold back my anger and do what must be done. If Jemba were dead —“
“Nothing would change,” Qui-Gon said wearily. “Obi-Wan, can’t you see? Killing Jemba is not the answer. Jemba is but one Hutt. There are always more, just as evil and greedy as he is. If you kill him, it won’t stop his plan from going forward. Another like him, perhaps someone worse, will take his place. What we must do is try to teach these people that —“
“But he is evil, isn’t he?” Obi-Wan asked.
“What Jemba is trying to do is wrong,” Qui-Gon answered carefully.
“I’ve never seen anyone who was so evil,” Obi-Wan burst out.
A sad smile touched Qui-Gon’s lips. “and have you been so many places, young Obi-Wan?”
Obi-Wan fell silent. He had much to learn. His heart cried out that Jemba was evil, and that evil had spread to enslave i
“I’ve seen far worse,” Qui-Gon continued. “If you think of killing in anger, you must know such thoughts come from the dark side.”
“Then how can we make him give the dactyl back?” Obi-Wan asked.
“You can’t. You can’t force people to be just and decent. Such qualities arise from within — they ca
“But… you’ve killed before,” Obi-Wan added hesitantly.
“I have,” Qui-Gon admitted, ”when there was no other choice. But when I kill, I only win a fight. It’s a small, small victory. There are greater battles to be won — battled of the heart. Sometimes, with patience and reason and by setting a good example, I have won more than a fight — I have turned my adversary into a friend.”
Obi-Wan considered this. Despite his pain and weakness, Qui-Gon was taking the time to explain his thoughts to Obi-Wan. Only yesterday, the Jedi most likely would have issued a stern order, then dismissed him. Something had changed between them.
“You’re testing me, aren’t you,” Obi-Wan guessed. “You’ve changed your mind. You are considering me for your Padawan.” He tried to keep the eagerness out of his voice.
Qui-Gon shook his head. “No,” he said firmly. I’m not testing you, Obi-Wan. Life tests you! Every day it brings you new chances for triuph or defeat. And if you pass the test, it doesn’t make you a Jedi. It makes you human.”
Obi-Wan stepped back, as if Qui-Gon had slapped him. With a rush of emotion, he saw into his own heart. He had been fooling himself. He had told himself that he had accepted Qui-Gon’s decision, that all he wanted was his respect. But somewhere deep inside, he had hoped that if he acted bravely and well on this mission, Qui-Gon would change his mind.
Now he saw the truth.
Qui-Gon saw the change in Obi-Wan’s eyes. The boy finally understood that his decision was final. He should have been relieved. The boy’s anger had left him. But something else was gone as well. Obi-Wan’s hopes for the future had also faded.
Qui-Gon watched as Obi-Wan turned and wiped his face with his sleeve. Was the boy crying? Had he hurt him so deeply?
But when Obi-Wan turned back, only sweat was gone from his face. Qui-Gon could see no glistening sign of tears. Instead, he saw the worst kind of defeat.
It stung him. After all his noble talk of wi