Soldier of Sidon

35

ATER AND I came to the river. He was no longer afraid, but thought only of mares and of fighting the stallions who held them, of coupling with them, and of protecting them and the foals they would bear. It ca

While I was polishing my shield last night, I remembered a white stallion-the armor I wore, and the lions that roared on either side as I spurred toward my enemy. But most of all the stallion, the swift white stallion of the sun. How fine he was! How strong and beautiful and brave! I did not keep him, and I resolved that I would not keep Ater.

When we reached the river, I dismounted, took away his bridle, and threw it into the water. "You have repaid me for saving you from the lions," I told him. (I had read of it here.) "We're quit, and I will not keep you as a slave. Go in peace."

He watched me with one eye, afraid to believe in freedom.

"Go! Good luck to you!" I slapped his flank. "Find her!"

He trotted for a hundred paces or so before he turned to look back at me. Are we enemies, Latro?

"No!" I shouted. "Friends! Friends forever!"

He stared for a moment, again through the left eye, turned, and trotted away.

A boatman who had been watching me said, "You must be mad to free that animal. I'm going to catch it."

"I am." The point of my spear stopped him before he had taken a step. "Mad indeed! My whole family will tell you when you meet them in the Deadland." Leaning toward him I whispered, "I killed them. Killed them all. My wife. Our children. My own parents, her parents, and our children's parents. All dead! Dead! But I've forgotten it." I laughed, not to impress him but because it had struck me that it might be true. "You must row me to the city on an island. Take me this instant! A great fish means to swallow it. The crocodile told me, and I must warn the people."

I untied the painter and got into his boat. "We go. Or I go. Wouldn't this sail better if it were turned over?"

He hurried to jump in with me. "It's mine. My boat. I'd starve without it."

"Make sail," I told him. When he landed me on this island I gave him a coin, which surprised him no end.

I found a cookshop and ate, not because I was hungry but because I knew it had been long since I had eaten, and I felt weak. I ate bread hot from the pan, steaming, strengthening, and greasy, and a big bowl of fish soup that was at least tolerable. In the market I bought a few fresh dates. These left my hands sticky but were as good, I believe, as any food any man has ever put into his mouth.

When I had finished the last and let a starving cur lick my hands, it occurred to me that I might go to a temple, make some small offering, and pray that I again remember as other men do. Then that I might so visit all the temples in the city, telling the priests about Falcata and asking the help of the gods in reclaiming her.

A man I spoke with recommended the Sun Temple, but it is on the mainland. I resolved to visit it when I left, and returned to the quay, eventually walking all around the island. Several people told me that a large foreign ship had passed that way three days before. One said it had docked for a time, pointing to the place. All agreed that there was no such ship in the docks now. When I inquired about a lofty building not far from the water, I was told it was the temple of Isis. I had already passed one such temple on the southern end of the island without entering, and resolved that I would not thus pass this one.

A priest waited at the entrance to collect the offerings of those who had come to petition the goddess. Watching him for a time, I observed that he accepted any offering, no matter how small.

I gave him a silver shekel, and asked the best way of gaining her gracious attention.

"Leave those weapons with me," he said, "I will watch over them and return them when you leave. Prostrate yourself before the goddess, swearing to do anything she may command, make your petition, and listen in silence, waiting for her to speak in your heart."

I thanked him and did as he suggested. The doors of the holiest place were half open, so we might glimpse the goddess within. I prostrated myself. "I am a strong man, O great Isis, well able to work and fight. I have lost my sword Falcata, which I beg you to restore to me. Any order you give me I will forget in a day or less, I know. But I will write it where I will see it again, and obey you without fail. Have I murdered my parents? My wife? Our children? I ask these things because the words came to my lips today, and I ca

She motioned to me, and I rose and entered the holiest place.

"I am the daughter of Ra," she told me, "the mother of many kings, the mistress of magic, and the friend of women." Her voice was slow and warm, the voice of a loving woman speaking to a child. Stooping, she laid her hand on my head. "I ca

Her murmured blessing was spoken too quickly for me to understand it, and was perhaps in a tongue I do not have. Yet it filled me with warmth and light.

"Look behind you," she said, "and you will see a big man in a dirty tunic, prostrate on my floor. You must return to him."

I was leaving the holiest place when her voice stopped me. "I found no blood guilt in you," she called after me. "You have murdered no one."

When I reclaimed my spear, my shield, and my "lost temple" club, I spoke of Falcata with the priest. He had never seen such a sword. The swords of this land are long and straight, two-edged. I saw such swords in the market.

Now I sit upon a floating pier to write, wetting my pen in the river. I WAS A slave once in this temple. The priest Kashta tells me this. "You were our watchman," he said, "and we haven't had such a good watchman since. Directed by the god, we gave you and your wife to a king from the south."

I said that I would make an offering to the god-he is the God of the south-if he would help me remember.

Holy Kashta shook his head. "We were blessed with rich gifts for you. I won't tax that burse you wear. Your means must be slender."

I protested, but he interrupted me. "You served Seth faithfully while you were here. If he will not oblige you for your service, he will not oblige you for a coin. Come in and make your petition."

He let me keep my weapons. When I had offered my prayer, he asked where I would sleep that night.

"I haven't found a place yet," I said, "but there must be those in this city who'll rent a bed to an honest man."

"You will be robbed. Sleep here. We will make a bed for you in the alcove. Six laymen are coming to guard the temple tonight. I'll tell them about you, and suggest they wake you if they need another man."

I write in this temple by the last light of the declining sun. THIS MORNING I talked to the leader of the men who guarded the temple. "No trouble," he said. "None at all. They know we're here. Did the woman wake you?"

No one had awakened me and I said so.

"She was looking for her husband. In a temple! At night! Drunk, if you ask me, and she must beat that little maid of hers unmercifully. But the thing is, a dog ran in when I opened the door for her. The priests won't like that, so we've got to find him and give him the boot before they get here. Will you help us?"

I said I would, but when we found him, he was hiding under a big table on which royal gifts were displayed. One man crawled under it to lay hold of him, but he came out quickly to beg a rag for his bleeding hand.