Secrets Of The Jedi

Chapter 27

They blasted off for the Azure Spaceport. The finest tech experts in the Republic army were already there, waiting to receive the codebreaking device.

Obi-Wan spoke to Anakin. "I suggest you get some rest on the journey. And Padme looks exhausted. If you could persuade her that she needs rest, it would do her good."

Anakin's gaze was opaque.

I so rarely know what he is thinking anymore, Obi-Wan thought.

"Yes, Master," Anakin said.

He is still obedient, but it is as though he makes an effort to be so.

Obi-Wan watched as Anakin went over to speak quietly to Padme. She nodded, and the two of them left the cockpit.

That left Siri and Taly and Obi-Wan. Siri kept her eyes on the instruments, even though Obi-Wan had plotted the course and there wasn't much for her to do. It all felt so familiar, the three of them in a cockpit, heading away from danger and most likely into more of it.

"Tell me something, Taly," Obi-Wan said, spi

"Protecting him?"

"He hired those bounty hunters and you never told the Senate."

"It was my last bargaining chip."

"But he hired Magus, and Magus killed your parents."

"Magus did that for revenge. I didn't blame Argente for their deaths. I blame Magus." Taly's face grew hard.

"So why didn't you tell?"

"I knew I would have to start over," Taly said. "I knew I needed a patron. I waited until I was older, and then I approached him when I was ready to take back my name and start my company. Who do you think gave me my first business loan?"

Obi-Wan shook his head ruefully. Qui-Gon had been right. Taly had known all along, and he had used that information. It must have taken an enormous amount of nerve to contact Passel Argente and demand hush money.

"I used Argente, but I never trusted him. He ended up coming at me in a way I didn't expect. But if I went to the Senate today and told some committee about a twenty-year-old plot, they'd laugh me out of the chambers. They have enough problems. Everything has changed, hasn't it? My best revenge on Argente now is to help you win the Clone Wars."

"Well, that's one thing we should be grateful for, at least," Siri said. She seemed more amused than irritated by Taly.

Taly approached her. "I have something for you." He held out his hand. Siri's old warming crystal lay in his palm, the cool deep blue of the crystal glowing slightly.

She took it wonderingly. "But how — "

"I went back to Settlement Five and bought it back from the same vendor you sold it to," he said. "I tracked him down. I always wanted to give it to you someday."

"Thank you, Taly," Siri said. She closed her fingers over it. A flush of pleasure lit her face.

"You think I don't remember," he said to both of them. "I remember how you fought for me. I remember everything."

He walked out of the cockpit. Obi-Wan gave a quick glance at Siri.

And you, Siri — do you remember everything?

She was keeping her face from him. They had buried this for so long. But how could they keep forgetting, when the reminders were so real?

"I promised you once never to remind you," Obi-Wan said.

"It's not you who is reminding me, though, is it?" A smile touched Siri's lips. "So much time has passed."

"And so little."

"And we've changed so much."

"Yes. You're more beautiful." The words left Obi-Wan before he could stop them. "And smarter, and stronger."

"And you," Siri said, "you've grown sadder."

"You can see that?"

"Forgive me if I still think I know you better than anybody else."

"You do."

"I don't regret our decision," Siri said. "I wouldn't want to go back and change it. Would you?"

"No," Obi-Wan said. "It was the right one. But…"

"Yes," Siri said. "It doesn't prevent you from regrets, does it? Regrets you can live with. It took me awhile, but I realized that Yoda and Qui-Gon were right. I would have regretted leaving the Jedi Order every day of my life. And that is not a life I would want to live. I've lived the life I wanted to live."

"I'm glad." Obi-Wan felt the same. But was it that simple for him? He wasn't sure. Somehow, on this trip, he was fully understanding, for the first time, how many regrets he did have. And secrets.

"What I regret," he said, "was not so much the decision we made, but what happened to us afterward. When we made the decision to part, it made our friendship become something else. Something that couldn't be quite as close as it should have been."

"Comrades, not best friends," Siri said.

He nodded. His other deep friendships — with Garen and Bant — were different. With them, he felt no barriers. With Siri, there was always a barrier. He did not think of it or speak of it, but it was always there. He wished it hadn't been. In some way he couldn't quite define, he felt like he had lost her twice.

"Well, it's not too late, is it?" Siri asked. "It took us almost twenty years to talk to each other about the past. Maybe now we can be the friends we were meant to be. I would like that. I'm tired of pushing away the past."

"Best friends, then."

Siri smiled, and the years fell away. Obi-Wan felt it then, the pain in his heart he had put away with his memories. It was as vivid as Siri's grin.

"Best friends," she agreed.