Master Of Space And Time

"Uh — I don't know. I didn't ask. I just looked at the Big Bang. I helped the universe make the Big Bang."

"This won't do, Fletcher. I'm in trouble over the missing gluons. I should call the police and —"

"Would you take a million dollars?" Lu was straining his face upward toward mine for a kiss. I let him have one. He tasted nice. I noticed I still had the phone in my hand. Oh, yes, Baumgard. "I'll give you a million dollars," I repeated and hung up.

I made sure the office door was locked, and then I let Tri Lu take off all my clothes. He swarmed onto me like an excited tick. I was huge and beautiful. We made love. I was glad to finally do it. I was glad to be a sexy woman.

An hour passed, maybe more. The office windows had Venetian blinds, and the afternoon sun was striping us with shadows. I sat up, remembering Nancy. Time to get dressed again, time to cover up.

I watched Tri Lu stepping awkwardly into his underwear. I loved him. He was a person, a person who wanted to be happy. I was happy, but I still wanted something more. I wanted yellow gluons.

"I have two million dollars," I said, taking the packets of bills from my purse. "One for you, one for Dana."

"Silly paper. Not worth like good love me you." He gave me one of his all-purpose smiles. His long hair stuck straight up from the top of his head.

"Oh, Lu." I hugged him one last time. "Thank you so much."

"I thank more. Soft cowgirl." He kissed his fingers and touched my breasts. I patted his cheek and then took out my compact to check my makeup. Hopelessly smeared. Nancy would know. Well, let her. I had to use my femaleness at least once, didn't I?

We left the money on Lu's desk and took the elevator down to the basement laboratory. There was a giant linear accelerator there, a silver tube stretching off down a tu

"Quark and gluon," Lu said, stepping over to the table. "Look, Joe." He handed me a little model, a single band of rubber with rubber-cement globs at either end. The blackened globs were the size of acorns.

"Like quark," said Lu, pointing to one of the globs. "Gluon co

I toyed with the little model for a minute. As long as the quark-globs were near each other, they experienced no particular attraction. But if you tried to pull them apart, the co

"If cut here," said Lu, pointing at the middle of the band, "make two new quark."

If the gluon was a band holding the quarks together, the quarks could be thought of as the ends of the gluon-band. Cutting the band would make two new loose ends, two new quarks.

"Instead I pinch off," said Lu, handing me a different model. It was like the first one, except here the co

"Two year work," said Lu, starting to laugh again. He was handing me a little magnetic bottle from a cabinet by the accelerator. "One thirtieth gram yellow gluons. Million dollar." His laughter slid into another coughing fit.

I opened the little bottle and looked inside. The gluons were yellow as the sun in water, yellow as Lu, yellow as an ear of corn. Hot, golden yellow. I put the bottle in my purse.

We said our goodbyes and I left the physics building to look for Nancy. I found her with Alwin on a stone bench a few hundred meters off. Leaves were blowing around, and the bright air was like cold water.

"You're a mess," said Nancy. "What took so long?"

I didn't answer. Instead I held up the gluons. "Here they are. Enough gluons for two and a half seconds. Have you figured out your wish?"

"I want to know what you did to smear your makeup like that, Joe."

"You know. I had to. I had to do it, Nancy."

"God, you're disgusting." She turned her face down and picked at a spot on her pants. Suddenly we were both in tears.

"I'm sorry, Nancy. I'm sorry I'm so twisted up. But the gluons will make everything right again. I'm sure they will." I sat down on Bitter's other side. "Tell her, Alwin. Tell her I love her."

"You tell her," said Bitter, getting to his feet. "I'm going home."

So I told Nancy that I loved her. I told her I wanted things to be the same again, only better. I told her I'd only let Lu have me so he would sell me the gluons. After a while Nancy believed me. A little longer, and I believed it too.

"So what are you going to wish for?" I asked when we'd finished making up.

"I was talking to Alwin and — I think I have an idea," said Nancy. "But I want to make sure I do it right. Could you explain about the Planck length again?"

"The Planck length is ordinarily about 10-33 centimeters," I said. "Much smaller than an atom or an elementary particle. The Planck length is the size scale below which ordinary physics breaks down. There's no cause and effect for things smaller than Planck length. There's total uncertainty down there, and anything can happen. Now, the idea behind the blunzer is to magnify the Planck length all the way up to one meter. When you get blunzed, the Planck length will get that big in a region around your head. So for a few seconds you'll be in a zone of total uncertainty. Anything you want to have happen will be true."

"What if the Planck length blew up to ten meters? Couldn't several people get blunzed at once then?"

"Yeah, I guess so. Only one person really needs to get the injection. The brain acts as a kind of amplifier."

"What injection?"

"The final stage of getting blunzed is where a needle jabs in through your fontanelle — you know, where Serena had her soft spot?"

"Right on top of my head?" Instinctively Nancy raised her hand to her scalp. "Does it hurt?"

"No, not really. You hear a sort of crunching, but it doesn't hurt. And then you're blunzed."

"You say I'll only have two seconds?"

"Two and two-fifths, actually. Now will you tell me what your wish is going to be?"

"No. Alwin told me not to. He said you might try to change my mind."

"Well, I'm not going to argue with you," I sighed. "Just make sure I get my body back. Shall we fly to New Brunswick?"

"Okay."

Nancy lay down on the ground, I sat on her butt, and we took off.

27. Nancy's Wish

Without a windfoil, Nancy couldn't fly as fast as Sondra had. We got up to a few hundred meters and followed the turnpike north to New Brunswick. When we were about halfway there, I spotted a big black dot approaching. A hawk? A guided missile?

No, it was Sondra, fresh out of the Carteret Correctional Center. She cruised up to us and we hovered there together for a minute.

"Isn't flying fun, Nancy?" said Sondra. Her face was flushed with excitement. "They let me out into the exercise yard and I took off. I'm going to see Alwin."

"We just saw him," I said. "He helped me get some more gluons."

"And I asked him what to wish for," added Nancy. "I get to make the wish."

"Why don't you just wish for lots of wishes?" Sondra suggested. "Wish for all the wishes we want."

"That's too vague," I protested. "I don't think wishes about wishing are allowed."

"It's just a machine," said Sondra. "Not a leprechaun or something. Nancy ought to ask for a hundred wishes."

The two women were hovering side by side. With the bright sun, I felt like a bather on a float. There were fields below us and, off to the right, the Jersey Turnpike, with cars crawling like ants.