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"I care about my career, Caroline," he went on. "And I intend to succeed. I don't think you have fully appreciated that."
A tingle of danger passed over her, but she ignored it. "Of course I appreciate it!" she said angrily. "'And I wanted to help you with it. I imagined being by your side…" She was forced to stop by the emotion almost choking her. Why was it so desperately, agonizingly difficult to watch a dream die?
"I intend that you shall be," he said, and for an instant he seemed uncertain whether to try being charming or not. The smile was there, but then it faded and the hardness returned. Perhaps he realized it was too late.
"I won't!" she retorted, and now she sounded like a petulant child.
"Grow up, Caroline!" he said sharply, staring across the lake, his face hard. "It's time you started to think like an adult and faced a few realities of life. This is not kids playing games where you can throw your toys away and storm off in a sulk if it doesn't go your way." He turned back to her. "If you don't want to get very badly hurt, then you'd better start thinking of the consequences of your behavior."
She exploded with a bellow of laughter, rough edged with fury and indignation. "That's wonderful, coming from you! I'm not the one whose career is in jeopardy because I went whoring around the place with anything that wasn't nailed down or had four legs! And was careless enough to be photographed doing it!"
He blushed dark red, but she wondered if it was shame for having done such things, or embarrassment at his own stupidity in having been caught and recorded for posterity, in particular for the newspapers and the divorce court. She was afraid it was the latter. She might have forgiven him had it been the first.
His eyes were hard and bright, far colder than the sun glittering off the blue lake. "I intend to deal with that," he said between his teeth.
"Oh yes? How?" she jeered. Anger was easier than tears. Self-pity would destroy her. It opened up like a great hungry pit in front of her, filled with the death of her dreams, the most tender and vulnerable and precious dreams she had ever known. That was a kind of murder as well. She would have to learn to hate him for that! The deceit of it, the deliberate cruelty.
He was impatient. "Well, for a start, you are going to forget about the whole incident and behave like the loving, loyal, and admiring wife you were last week. You are going to-"
"I am not! I am going to divorce you," she shouted. "And if you think for half a second that you are ever going to touch me again, you're out of your mind!"
His eyes widened. "My dear girl, I don't give a damn whether I touch you again or not! As no doubt you are now aware, I can take my pick of any number of very beautiful and willing women."
"Don't be so squeamish, Douglas. There are names for women who are willing to be so obliging. And usually you have to pay them for it!"
He gave an abrupt little laugh. "I've got dozens of friends who'd understand me very well; they can't afford not to!" He shook his head, and his voice was brittle. "No, Caroline, you'll play the loyal and trusting wife in public, whatever we do in private, because I intend to get into the Senate one day, possibly even the White House. I have no intention whatever of allowing you to parade your small-town outraged virtue to stop me."
She was aware of a sense of danger, and yet she couldn't help herself from going on. "Small-town virtue, as you put it, has stopped more powerful men than you, men who were better at not getting caught!" she said witheringly. "Good heavens, Douglas, even if your 'friends' in power don't care about your appetites, surely they have enough sense to care about your crass clumsiness at getting caught! A villain is one thing, a fool is quite another!"
She felt the satisfaction run warm all through her at the fury in his face and the knowledge that out here where anyone might see them, including any wandering reporters, he dared not even let the rage show in his body language, much less actually hit her. She very nearly smiled.
"Talking about getting caught," he said deliberately, his lips thin. "A bit careless of your mother getting 'caught' when she was at college, wasn't it? Not like the Hilda Finch I know. But of course she wasn't Finch then, was she!"
Caroline felt the blood drain from her face. How could he know that? For a moment she was dizzy, the sunlight was glaring, blinding her.
"Don't tell me you didn't know?" Douglas's voice came from far away. "But of course you know, or what I'm saying wouldn't mean anything to you, would it? And you wouldn't look like you'd just seen ghosts walking."
"How could you?" she demanded. "She would never have told you! She doesn't trust you and never did!" She was challenging him as if the fact that he shouldn't know meant that he didn't.
What did it matter how he knew? He did, that was the only ugly, horrible reality that counted.
"Claudia de Vries, darling! Who else?" Now he was mocking her. "Really, I'd have thought you could have worked that out for yourself. You're a disappointment, Caroline. Not only are you a prude and childishly unrealistic, but you're slow-witted as well. Don't make me spell all this out for you. Just acknowledge the facts and behave like a well-bred congressional wife."
"Or what?" She wanted to sound defiant, brave, and above all confident. She only sounded panicky and defensive.
"Oh, please!" he said wearily. "Do we have to play this all out to the bitter end?"
Caroline's mind raced, horrible possibilities crowding one after another. Would Douglas try to blackmail her mother as Claudia de Vries had? What would he do now? Did he merely know about the child because Claudia had told him, or could he prove it?
Anyway, these days who cared? Quite possibly it would simply add a little mystery and glamour to what had previously seemed a very staid and shallow, boring life. Her father was not around anymore to be hurt or embarrassed about it. Who was socially ruined because of a youthful tragedy these days?
And there was the other question she would like to have avoided ever asking. How much did she care, anyway? She and her mother had never been close, and the few rare confidences over the last two days did nothing to undo a lifetime's pattern. Would she live the rest of her own life tied to Douglas, living out a hideous charade of a marriage, to save her mother from possible embarrassment?
No, definitely not. Hilda could clean up her own mess.
She put her hands on her hips. "I suppose you also took Claudia's proof of this event?" she said with raised eyebrows.
"What do you think I'm going to do, blackmail your mother?" he said in surprise.
"Aren't you?" she countered. "Or, more exactly, blackmail me?"
"Hardly over that!" He dismissed it with a wave of his hand. "At least, not exactly," he amended. "Who cares if Hilda Finch had an illegitimate child thirty-something years ago? It would hardly be headline news."
Caroline was startled how deeply she resented his casual dismissal of her mother. It stung her pride, and she found herself instantly defensive, which was very odd. If ever there was anyone completely capable of looking after herself, it was her mother. But still she retaliated. "Not like a congressman caught on camera in what I imagine were some fascinating poses!" she said. "That would be news, illustrated news at that. A little difficult to deny… darling!"
His face was white, his eyes glittering. "I think there's really only one person interested in your mother's indiscretion, but he would be very interested indeed, especially when he knows that it was Claudia de Vries who told me."
"My… my half brother? I gather it is a brother, because you said 'he'?" she asked, finding herself breathless, her heart pounding.