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With that insight came a deeper one. Aliom rejected Inversion because it was resorted to when one had lost the fidelity between one's internal model of the universe and the external, objective reality, and thus could not find one's place in the overall pattern. After having misjudged the pattern, a person was tempted to Invert to correct that mistake by forcing the pattern to conform to their presence.
If fidelity was a law of nature, men Inversion was a breaking of that law, unless one's internal model -of reality had absolute fidelity, and one was in fact in me" proper place—and the pattern had become distorted. One might then Invert to restore the pattern expecting to survive it, as Jindigar had.
She rounded the last curve into the Aliom temple, desperate for time to think, but about two dozen Dushau were looking at her. They sat on the floor in a circle, most holding strange Dushau musical instruments. Jindigar's whule reserved a place just before Krinata. Beyond the circle, where the roof was still open and sunlight shafted down between uncovered rafters, a huge carving that would eventually be the Oliat symbol, the X supported at the crux by an arrow, stood half-finished. Piles of construction debris had been swept aside to clear the floor.
In the center of the Dushau's circle under the finished roof, there was a fireplace and chimney of smooth river stones. Despite the warmth of the day a fire burned in the center of the raised hearth. She saw Jindigar lying on his side under a thermal blanket, surrounded by Darllanyu and several others.
"Jindigar!" she gasped, and dashed to him, heedless of protocol. Kneeling, she took his hands, which were clenched to his chest, and felt the tremors shaking him, as bad as when Desdinda had died. She glanced around at Za
A male who sat opposite the door stood and said in Dushauni, "You see, she's not stable enough to attempt duad-grieving. This is no time for dangerous experiments with ephemerals. I can't permit this. That's my final judgment."
Krinata understood him and the general murmur of agreement from the others but was certain he didn't know it. She fought the splash of cold needles that prickled her skin at the vision of Jindigar dying, because his peers rejected him– because of her. Then she blinked aside a dizzying sense of deja vu, more Takora's than her own, though it seldom seemed that Takora was really a different person anymore.
Darllanyu put her hand over Krinata's and searched her eyes, whispering, "What is he worth to you?"
"My life," she answered without hesitation. 'Tell me what to do!"
Darllanyu squeezed the human hand with soft, napped fingers, rose, and faced the others. "You have the right to refuse to risk your lives for the community Raichmat's zunre have started here. Perhaps you can constitute an Oliat without me or Jindigar, but it could hardly be more than a heptad subform!"
"Even properly grieved and freed of the Archive, Jindigar would still be an Invert," answered the leader. "Who here is willing to balance with an Invert Archivist?"
Someone challenged, "Jindigar's no Archivist." The man came around the circle to confront Darllanyu. "That was settled when I tapped Grisnilter's Seal and discovered it had been breached. We all know what Jindigar is and what he's done. He should be allowed to go to dissolution/death without taking anyone else with him."
Darllanyu replied, "Your own grief for Prey colors your feelings, if not your skills, Threntisn,"
"You will leave my son out of this! I'm Senior Historian here, and—"
Not Frey's father! The Historian Darllanyu had expected to lift the Archive from Jindigar was Prey's father.
"You're in first grief," countered Darllanyu. "You're forgiven. Perhaps you truly can't do anything for Jindigar."
"Darllanyu." It was the leader. "He is Senior."
Another man rose to stand beside the leader, who seemed to be about to walk out. "Threntisn is right. If we try this, we could all be lost in the Archive—and wife an ephemeral, there's hardly any chance of success."
One of the darker indigo, thus older, women scoffed, "Who told you pioneering would be safe! Ephemerals have been doing it for mille
"Not exactly, but I'm willing to risk my life—which is not the same," she granted, "as you risking yours." Under questioning she told them all she remembered of her last brush with the Archive, the banishing of the Desdinda Loop, ending, "And I died with Takora—I really thought I was dead until I woke up." —and found Jindigar dead. "I'm still not sure what was real and what wasn't. I'm not sure how Frey died."
"We'll have to go through that with Jindigar," added Darllanyu. "Find out exactly how Frey died."
Find out that I killed him? She swallowed and knew she'd do even that public penance to revive Jindigar. Will they label me zunre-killer and shun us both?
Darllanyu cut through a general dissension, saying, "Jindigar is in crisis. Krinata came to help him, even though she doesn't need to grieve Frey to survive this. I won't let her stand alone! I'll grieve with them!"
Krinata was sure Jindigar's tremors were increasing, his whole nervous system in chaos. She pled with one of those still kneeling beside him. "Can't you do something?"
"He's had all the medication we dare use. At least it stopped the convulsions."
Za
That started a general movement as one and then another rose and came 4o Darllanyu, saying things like, "I don't approve of him, but I can't desert him for bad judgment."
And, "He's our only priest after all." Or, "I'll never balance him, but we can't allow him to die."
Finally eight people stood with Darllanyu, including those who'd knelt beside Jindigar, trying to help him.
Then her heart sank as the leader confronted them. "Ten of you? It's much too dangerous. This community can't afford to lose so many. I can't permit it."
Krinata loosed Jindigar's knotted fingers and stood up, indignation welling up as she drew breath. A silence fell that let them hear every shovel of dirt pitched by the gardeners, every echoing hammer blow from far outside the stockade, and every cry of the half-tamed beasts of burden.
"It says there"—Krinata pointed to the portal where the artisan had ceased carving—"Fidelity is a Law of Nature. That's carved over the lightning symbol of Aliom. The carving's not even finished yet, and you're all acting as if familiarity had blinded you to the real meaning!
"Jindigar opened my eyes to the Me force co
She hadn't known she'd ever had such thoughts, but just for that instant she'd understood their alien viewpoint and framed the thought easily in their own language. When she finished, a breathless silence fell.
The old woman said, from her seat, "Jindigar's always been eccentric, but he fears Inversion as much as any of us. I think Lady Zavaro