Farfetch

The rest of the day became one of those blurs of sheer endurance that had punctuated their lives since they'd left Truth. Only a few incidents stood out clearly.

Darllanyu, during their next break, tended Jindigar, murmuring in Dushauni, probably expecting that no one else here understood. "You'll be all right. I'll see to it." But Krinata heard the desperation in her voice. "You'll balance us, and when the work is done, there'll be time– together."

She means in Renewed, thought Krinata, feelings mixed.

Cy and Darllanyu munched extra ration bars as they went, trying to make up for their long starvation while promising good foraging ahead. But despite their weakened condition, they pushed the pace uncomfortably. When rotation of loads put Krinata beside Adina, she answered everything Krinata said with a complaint about the pace or Jindigar's bad judgment in getting involved with Chinchee. "He deserved what he got!" Krinata held her tongue, refusing to defend Jindigar where no defense was needed, and she passed the time probing into her own mind as one might tongue a sore spot in the mouth.

There was an aching hole where she'd become accustomed to Desdinda's rage. Her whole body felt relaxed and at peace, despite scrapes, bruises, and the scalp bum. But there was also something else. Every thought, every perception seemed tinged with a thought pattern she recognized as Takora—as if she halfway shared those memories. When she thought of Jindigar, it was as a tall, gangling youth of surprising energy and i

Krinata had never been awed by Jindigar's nearly seven thousand years' seniority on her, but neither had she felt affectionately amused by him. Reluctantly she decided she'd traded Desdinda's ghost for Takora's. Exorcising Desdinda had been such a disaster, she couldn't think of throwing Takora out. Besides, she seemed benevolent. Ignored, perhaps she'd eventually fade away.

It was well after full dark when they camped. While hauling water to bathe Jindigar, she overheard a comment Adina made to Cy. "Our Lady Zavaro

"Lady Zavaro

Adina and Viradel related their highly colored version of Krinata's adventures with the triad. Krinata had few com– punctions about eavesdropping on shameless gossips, but listening to herself being painted as an interspecies whore hurt. She'd have no friends if they spread such things around the settlement. But she couldn't worry about that now. Jindigar was still catatonic and had to be carefully tended if he was going to survive.

It started to rain exactly when Darllanyu had predicted, but by then they had rigged tarps over the sleds and set a shielded smoke hole for a cook fire because they all needed hot food and a warm place to sleep. Krinata bedded the children down, with sedatives to ease the nightmares, then she signed up for the third watch, her favorite, because nightmares usually struck just at dawn.

She was asleep before she'd completely sealed her sleeping bag. She woke with two piols struggling to get inside to share her warmth. The fire had burned low.

Darllanyu was sitting next to it, feeding it twigs, while beside her, Cy roasted a chunk of meat on a stick, trying to argue her into going back to sleep. Krinata turned over, trying to block out the low voices.

As Cy ate his snack they fell to discussing the multi-colony. It seemed Cy knew all about the conspiracy and approved of it. "So you say there's a chance Ambassador Trinarvil may still turn up to balance the Oliat?"

"She intended to but had to return to Dushaun first. If she can get away, she'll bring as many as she can—but Zinzik had Dushaun blockaded when we left. Trinarvil may be dead by now."

After a silence Cy asked, "Am I being too intrusive? I mean, it seemed like you wanted to talk—"

"I do. Jindigar—I never told you we were first mates. We had no children. That's typical of a first Renewal, you know. I last saw him at the birth of his first daughter. Ws agreed—to try again someday." She threw a stick into the fire. "But I don't know if he can work with Trinarvil now, or she with him. Or with me, for that matter. It's tricky– with both of us so close to Renewal."

She's close to Renewal too? This was completely different from overhearing Adina maligning her. This was private. Krinata extracted herself from bedroll and piols, pulled on jacket and boots, and went to check on Jindigar before joining them at the fire. Cy offered her a chunk of meat, and Darllanyu moved aside to make a place for her on the soft pile of grass. Even thus welcomed, Krinata couldn't meet Cy's gaze for thinking of Adina's words.

She knew he believed the worst when he offered to take a turn around the perimeter—out in the rain. When he'd gone, Darllanyu prompted, "Tell me more of what Jindigar had you doing in triad. He's known as a thorough trainer—"

"Oh, he never intended—" She cut off, assembled her thoughts in defense of Jindigar, and related how he'd used her talent to escape the Emperor's brig. "So, you see, we figured we'd all be killed in the attempt, but we couldn't just sit there and let the Emperor use us to force Jindigar to confess that all Dushau were conspirators in treason!"

"He used you in an Inverted triad!" She shook her head, astonishment turning to acceptance. "I admit I'm dismayed, but one learns to expect that where Jindigar's involved. Tell me, how did you feel when you discovered that the Emperor's accusation against Dushau was partly true?"

"Betrayed," she said truthfully, then explained about the Desdinda Loop. "It was mostly her attitude and seems to be gone now. You'd only withheld one planet, not dozens, and I think the report was correct—the natives make this place uncolonizable. Better the Dukes never get their hands on these natives!" She looked at the Dushau woman in a new light. Frey had not wanted to know anything about how an ephemeral felt. "May I ask a personal question?"

"Certainly, though I might not answer."

"Are you Invert too?"

She chuckled. "I see why Jindigar likes you!" Sobering, she added, "Jindigar's survival indicates he hasn't abused Inversion—though if he dies now, it'd seem otherwise. I respect him for that, but I'd rather have nothing to do with Inversion or, no offense, ephemerals."

"No offense. I'm begi

"Every line's tight. No sign of prowling animals."

"Nor likely to be," said Darllanyu. Thunder growled in the distance. "But there could be tornadoes," she added.

"Should I wake everyone?" asked Cy.

Darllanyu seemed to consider, eyes unfocused, communing in triad with her zunre at the settlement. Then, rising, she shook her head. "Not yet. The worst of the disturbance is over the Squadron's base camp. We should be in the clear, at least for a while. I'm going to sleep." She went to where Jindigar lay cocooned among extra bedrolls and, after checking on him, slid into her own sleeping bag, fending off the two restless piols, and seemed to be instantly asleep.

"It's almost my watch," said Krinata, intently feeding the fire. "Why don't you go get some sleep too?"

"What's the matter? Have I offended you?"

"I only offered to take part of your watch. Is that unfriendly?"