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“Come on, Dar,” Mort whispered, urgent, but she’d already started kicking at the door. It shuddered in its frame with every blow from her Doc Martens.
The scrabbling, clicking sounds of locks turning, chain sliding back, and the door opened an inch or two. The face pressed into the crack was backlit and featureless in the glare of yellow incandescent light, leaking like pus or urine from the house.
“What the hell do you want, bitch?” the face hissed, voice worn raw and gravelly, female voice, old as someone’s grandmother.
“I’m looking for somebody,” Daria said, slipping the toe of her boot into the crack between door and jamb.
“Well, you’re lookin’ in the wrong place,” the woman said, glancing down at Daria’s intruding foot.
“He’s been here before.”
“Well he ain’t here now!”
“Then let me in, and I’ll see for myself.”
The woman opened the door an inch wider, and Niki caught a glimpse of her burning eyes, eyes like the pit of famine’s stomach, and the long, uneven keloid scar beneath her right eye, proud flesh like melted plastic.
“Look, white girl. If you keep shootin’ off your mouth and makin’ all this noise, Mr. Wilson’s go
Mort’s big hand on Daria’s shoulder then, and Niki could see that he was almost ready to drag her from the porch, kicking and screaming and squeezing his balls if that was the only way back to the van.
“He’s not here, Dar. Let’s go,” he said.
“She might be lying,” Daria said, as if the woman wasn’t standing there, as if she couldn’t hear.
“Girl, you think tonight’s a good time to die or you just stupid?”
Behind the woman, down the half-glimpsed throat of pissy light and wallpaper peeling in long skin strips, someone shouted, “Who the hell is it, Tabs?”
The woman stared at them, at Daria, with her starvation eyes, and after a moment she yelled back, without turning around, yelled, “Goddamn Jehovah’s-fuckin’ Witnesses!”
And the other voice, male boom and rumble, “At night? Well, tell ’em to go the fuck away!”
“You heard the man,” she said. “He won’t say it that nice again.”
“Now, Dar,” and Mort was hauling her backwards, Niki sidestepping quickly to get out of their way.
The door slammed shut, and now the house was as dark and sealed away from the rest of the universe as it had been before. Daria pulled free of Mort and almost tumbled ass-first down the steps.
“What the hell did you think you were doing, Mort?” she demanded, looking back at the closed door.
“Trying to stop you from getting us all killed.”
“You’re so full of shit!”
A red and listing Plymouth crammed full of teenagers, black boys in sunglasses and black knit caps, cruised shark-slow past the van, big white van beached like a lunatic’s whale there against the curb.
“Can we just please get the hell out of here?” Niki asked, heard the fear and exasperation wrestling between her words, fussing over the tattered rags of her resolve.
“We’re already on our way,” Mort said and headed for the Ford. Niki, painfully uncertain, waited for Daria, who stood for one moment more, with fists clenched, staring back at the scarred and defiant house.
3.
And this is the first time that Keith had seen Daria, had laid eyes on her, this muggy summer weeknight in 1993 back when the junk still felt like gold and Dr. Jekyll’s was still the Cave. Barely six months since he’d had that last and grandest fight with Sarah and she’d driven off alone to find her own gilded peace pressed between rails and spi
And then he’d walked into the Cave one night, needing a fix and not a copper pe
Her hair had been the dirtiest sort of blond back then, and he’d watched her unpack her bass, had tried to remember the name he’d seen on the marquee as he’d come in, red plastic letters that had meant nothing. Wednesday nights were always dead, and there was no one to watch her, no one but him and the bartender with his pink eyes and cornsilk hair. She’d finished tuning and looked toward him, but he was hidden by shadows and the glare of the lights; she’d shaded her eyes with one hand and, to the geeky boy with his too-new guitar and tie-dyed Sonic Youth T-shirt, had said, “Okay, guys. Standing room only tonight.” The geeky boy had laughed, and Keith scrunched down deeper into the shadows, had felt like a hungry cockroach, sipping his shitty beer and watching someone laying out a feast from his kitchen crack.
And then the songs had come one right after the other, no introductions or titles or stupid banter between the singer and her guitarist or drummer. Just her words and her aching voice, like stained glass, beautiful and shattered sound fused together with solder, frozen lead seams binding the deepest reds and clearest cobalt blues.
He’d finished his shitty beer, and for a while there had been only the empty cup, worried between his jonesing fingers. At some point, the albino kid had brought him another, even though he hadn’t asked, but he’d hardly noticed. Had hardly even thought of the pain worming about in every cell of his body, no room for anything but the nameless girl and her nameless band.
A few people straggled in towards the end, goth queers who sat near him in the back and talked loud enough to hear themselves over the music. He’d leaned over to them in the white space between songs, before the very last, and “Why don’t you guys just listen,” he’d said. A fat girl with so much eyeliner she’d looked like a gluttonous raccoon had sneered at him, and then they’d all started talking again.
“Stupid fuckers,” he’d grunted, but they’d ignored him, too infatuated with the patter of their own voices to be bothered by the world.
The last song had been more amazing than all the rest together.
Afterwards, he’d slipped u
“Hi,” he’d said, one clumsy word.
“Hi,” she’d said, that voice so much different when she spoke, but still the same voice. “You’re Keith Barry, aren’t you? You used to play with Stiff Kitten.”
“Uh, yeah…”
“Wow,” the Sonic Youth boy said, springing up from a rusty folding chair, hand out like a karate chop. “You guys were fucking killer, man.”