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There certainly were, and after a half an hour of detailed explanations I think I had convinced them all that something nasty was going to happen to the aliens and the war would be over, and they certainly approved of that. There were smiles and nods, and even a few muffled cheers. When Inskipp spoke it was obvious that he spoke for them all.
“We can do it! End this terrible war! Send the enemy fleet into another universe!”
“That is perfectly correct,” I said.
“IT IS FORBIDDEN,” a deep voice, a disembodied voice, said. Speaking apparently from the empty air over the table.
It was very impressive and at least one officer clutched at his chest, whether for his heart or some religious tract was not clear. But Inskipp, con man himself, was not co
“Who said that? Which one of you is the joker with the ventriloquial projector?”
There were loud cries of i
“It is forbidden because it is immoral. We have spoken.”
“Who have spoken?” Inskipp shouted.
“We are the Morality Corps.”
This time the voice came from the open doorway, not out of the air, and it took an instant to realize this. One by one the heads snapped around and every eye was fixed on the man when he came in. And very impressive he was too. Tall, with long white hair and beard, wearing a floor-length white robe. But it was hard to impress Inskipp.
“You are under arrest,” he said. “Call the guards to take him away. I’ve never even heard of the Morality Corps.”
“Of course not,” the man answered in deep tones. “We are too secret for that.”
“You, secret,” Inskipp sneered. “My Special Corps is so secret that most people think it is just a rumor.”
“I know. That’s not too secret. My Morality Corps is so secret there aren’t even any rumors of its existence.”
Inskipp was turning red and begi
“Of course,” he fixed me with a steely gaze. “What is your most secret code?”
“I should tell you?”
“Of course not. I’ll tell you. It is the Vasarnap Cipher, is it not?”
“It might be,” I equivocated.
“It is,” he answered sternly. “Go then to the Top Secret computer terminal there and give it this message in that cipher. The message is ‘Reveal all about the Morality corps.’ ”
“I’ll do that,” Inskipp said. “The agent diGriz is not cleared for the Vasarnap Cipher.” That’s how much he knew. But all the eyes were upon him as he went to the computer terminal and rattled the keys. Then he took a cipher wheel from his pocket, plugged it into the terminal, and typed in the message. The speaker scratched and the monotone voice of the computer droned out.
“Who makes this request?”
“I, Inskipp, head of the Special Corps.”
“Then Iwill reveal that the Morality Corps is the top priority secret force in the League. Its orders must be obeyed. The orders will be issued by the Morality Corps top executive. At the present time the top executive is Jay Hovah.”
“I am Jay Hovah,” the newcomer said. “Therefore I repeat. It is forbidden to send the alien invaders into a parallel world.”
“Why?” I asked. “You don’t mind our blowing them up, do you?”
He fixed his stern gaze upon me. “To battle in self-defense is not immoral. This is the defense of one’s home and loved ones.”
“Well if you don’t mind our blowing them up—what is the complaint about slipping them into another world line? That won’t hurt them half as much.”
“It won’t hurt them at all. But you will be sending ravening aliens in a giant battle fleet into a parallel universe where they did not exist before. You will be responsible for their killing all the humans in that universe. That is immoral. A way must be found to eliminate the enemy without making others suffer.”
“You can’t stop us,” one of the admirals shouted in anger.
“I can and I will,” Jay Hovah said “It says in the Constitution of the League of United Planets that no immoral acts will be indulged in by member planets or by forces operating under the orders of member planets. You will find that a clause is included in the original agreement signed by all planetary representatives that a Morality Corps will be founded to determine what is moral. We are the top authority. We say no. Find yourself another plan.”
While Jay was talking all the little wheels in my head were spi
“Stop this bickering,” I said, then had to repeat myself, shouting, before I was heard. “I have come up with the alternative plan.” This quieted them down and even Jay stopped pontificating for a bit to listen. “The Morality Corps protests that it would be an immoral act to shoot all the nasties into a parallel universe where they can work their will upon the human beings there. Is that your argument, Jay?”
“Put rather crudely, but in essence, yes.”
“Then you wouldn’t protest at all if we pushed the enemy into a parallel universe where there were no human beings?”
He opened and shut his mouth a few times at that one, then scowled fiercely. I smiled and lit a cigar. The admirals buzzed, mostly with bafflement since they weren’t too bright or they wouldn’t have enlisted in the peacetime navy.
“I would like a second opinion,” Jay Hovah finally said.
“By all means, but make it fast.”
He glared at me, but pulled out a gold pendant that hung about his neck and whispered into it. Then listened. And nodded.
“It would not be immoral to send the aliens into a universe where there were no human beings. I have spoken.”
“What is happening?” a bewildered admiral asked.
“It’s very simple,” I told him. “There are millions, billions, probably an infinite number of parallel galaxies. Among this number there must surely be one where homo sapiens never existed. There might even be a galaxy populated only by aliens where our enemies would be made welcome.”
“You have just volunteered to find the right one,” Inskipp ordered. “Get moving, diGriz, and find us the best place to send that battle fleet.”
“He shall not go alone,” Jay Hovah a
“Very flattering,” I said.
“Therefore we do not take his word for anything. When he looks for the correct parallel galaxy one of our agents will accompany him.”
“That’s just fine,” I told him. “But please don’t forget that there is a war on and I don’t want one of your leaden-footed, psalm-singing moralists hanging around my neck.” Jay was whispering instructions into his communicator. “This is a military operation and I move fast…”
I shut up when she walked in the door. From Jay’s outfit, if the long robe meant anything, but it was filled quite differently from his. Some very interesting curves revealed rather than concealed. Honey-blonde hair, rose lips, shining eyes. A very attractive package in every way.
“This is agent Incuba who will accompany you,” Jay said.
“Well, in that case I withdraw my objections,” I smarmed. “I’m sure she is a very efficient officer…”
“Oh, yes?” a voice spoke out from the thin air, the second time this day. Only this one was a female voice that I instantly recognized. “If you think you are going galaxy-hopping alone with that sleazy sexpot, Jim diGriz, you are very mistaken. You better book three tickets.”