A Kiss of Shadows

"Bhatar stayed in my room at night. He never left my side when I was a child. Father taught me chess, but Bhatar taught me how to beat Father." It made me smile.

"He still speaks well of you," Sholto said.

I started to ask, then shook my head. "No, he would never have suggested that you do this. He would never have risked my safety, or yours. You see, he spoke well of you, too, King Sholto.

The best king the sluagh had had in two hundred years, that's what he used to say."

"I'm flattered."

"You know what your people think of you." I tried to read that face. The need was there, but need could mask so many things. "What of the hags, your little harem?"

"What of them?" he asked, but there was a look in his eyes, that gave lie to his casual words.

"They wanted to hurt me to keep me from you. What do you think they'll do if you actually bed me?"

"I am their king. They will do as they are told."

I laughed then, but it wasn't bitter, just ironic. "You are a king of a fey people, Sholto, they never do quite what you tell them, or quite what you think they will. From sidhe to pixie, they are free things. Take for granted their obedience and you do so at your peril."

"Like the queen has done for a mille

I smiled, nodding. "As the king of the Seelie Court has done for even longer."

"I am a new king compared to them and not quite so arrogant."

"Then tell me truly what will your hag lovers do if you desert them for me?"

He seemed to think about it for a minute, long and slow, then he looked at me. His face was serious. "I don't know."

I almost laughed. "You are new at being king. I've never heard one of them admit ignorance before."

"Not knowing a thing is not ignorance. Feigning knowledge you don't have, can be," he said.

"Wise, as well as modest; how terribly unique for fey royalty." I remembered a question I'd wanted to ask. "The Agnes that took you into the woods as a boy, your na

"Yes," he said.

I fought not to frown. "Your ex-na

"She has not aged," he said, "and I am all grown up now."

"Growing up around immortal beings is confusing, I admit, but there are still fey that helped raise me that I don't think of in that way."

"As there are among the sluagh for me, but Agnes is not one of them."

I wanted to ask why, but didn't. First, it was none of my business; second, I might not understand the answer even if he gave it to me. "How do you know the queen intends to execute me for certain?" Back to the important topic.

"Because I was sent to Los Angeles to kill you." He said it like it meant nothing-no emotion, no regret, just fact.

My heart beat a little faster, my breath catching in my throat. I had to concentrate to ease the air out without making it noticeable. "If I don't agree to sleep with you, then you carry out the sentence?"

"I gave my oath that I meant you no harm. I meant it."

"You would go against the queen for my sake?"

"The same reasoning that keeps us safe if we bed each other, keeps me safe if I leave you alive. She needs my sluagh more than she needs to be vindictive."

He seemed so certain of that last part. Certain of what he was certain of, uncertain of everything else; like most of us if we're honest. I looked at that strong face, the jaw a little wide for my taste, the bones of the cheek at little too sculpted. I liked a softer look to my men, but he was undeniably handsome. His hair was a perfect white, thick and straight, held back in a loose ponytail. The hair fell to his knees like one of the older sidhe, even though Sholto was only about two hundred years, give or take. The shoulders were broad, the chest looked good under the white, button-down shirt. The shirt fell absolutely smooth, and I wondered if he were using some sort of glamour to make it so, because I knew that what lay under the shirt was not smooth. "The offer is very unexpected, Sholto. I'd like some time to think about it, if I may?"

"Until tomorrow night," he said.

I nodded, and stood. He stood as well. I found myself staring at his chest and stomach trying to see that movement I'd noticed on the street. Nothing showed, he was wasting glamour on keeping it hidden." I don't know if I can do this," I said.

"What?" he asked.

I motioned at him. "I saw you once without a shirt when I was much younger. The sight... stayed with me."

His face paled, eyes hardening. He was throwing his walls back in place. "I understand. The thought of touching me frightens you. I do understand, Meredith." He let out a long breath. "It was a pretty thought while it lasted." He turned away from me, gathering his long coat from the back of the chair where he'd laid it. The heavy tail of hair lay like a white furred stripe down his body.

"Sholto," I said.

He didn't turn around, just held the length of hair over one shoulder while he put on his coat.

"I didn't say no, Sholto."

He turned then. His face was still closed, careful, all the emotions I'd worked so hard to find buried again. "Then what are you saying?"

"I'm saying, no sex tonight, but I can't say yes, I'll have sex with you, until I see everything."

"Everything?" He made it a question again.

"Now who's being coy," I said.

I watched the idea take shape on his face, in his eyes. A strange little smile played on his lips. "Are you asking to see me naked?"

"Not all of you." I had to smile at the look on his face. "But down to your thighs, yes, please. I have to see how I truly feel about your... extras."

He smiled and it was warm with an edge of uncertainty. It was his real smile, that edge of charm and fear. "That is the kindest way anyone has ever described them."

"If I can't be with you in joy and shared pleasure, then your dream of matching your glow with another falls apart. A sidhe does not glow for things that are duty and not pleasure."

He nodded. "I understand."

"I hope so, because it's more than seeing you nude. I need to touch and be touched to see if..." I spread my hands wide. "If I can do this."

"But no sex tonight?" His voice was as close to playful as I'd ever heard it.

"You dream of sidhe flesh and have never had it. I have had it, and for three, nearly four years, I've gone without. I miss home, Sholto. Strange and perverse as it is, I miss it. If I agree to this, then I get a sidhe lover and home. Not to mention I'm escaping a death sentence. You are not a fate worse than death, Sholto."

"Some have thought so over the years." He tried to make it a joke, but his eyes gave him away.

"That's why I need to see what I'm getting myself into."

"Do I raise the question of love, or is that too naive for a king and a princess?" he asked.

I smiled, but this time it was sad. "I tried love once; it betrayed me."

"Griffin is a worthless thing, Meredith, unworthy of such depth of emotion, and certainly incapable of returning it."

"I found that out, eventually," I said. "Love is grand while it lasts, Sholto, but it doesn't last."

We looked at each other. I wondered if my eyes were as tired and full of regret as his.

"Am I supposed to argue with you, and tell you some love does last?" Sholto asked.

"Are you going to?"

He smiled, and shook his head. "No."

I held my hand out to him. "No lies, Sholto, not even the pretty ones." His hand was very warm wrapped around mine. "Let me take you to bed, and see what I'm bargaining for."

He let me lead him toward the bed. "Do I get to see what I'm bargaining for?"

I pulled him backward toward the bed so I could watch his face. "If you like."

A look passed through his eyes that was neither sidhe, nor human, nor sluagh, but simply male. "I like," he said.