Guilty Pleasures

He took a deep breath and let it out, then shook himself like a dog coming out of water. “I can do it. If I have a choice, I can do it.”

It was my turn to stare. “Why didn’t you have a choice before?”

He looked away. “I just felt like I had to bring you if you wanted to come.”

“No, dammit, that wasn’t what you meant at all.” I touched his face and forced him to look at me. “Someone gave you orders to come see me the other day, didn’t they? It wasn’t just to find out about Jean-Claude, was it?”

His eyes were wide, and I could feel his pulse under my fingers. “What are you afraid of, Phillip? Who’s giving you orders?”

“Anita, please, I can’t.”

My hand dropped to my lap. “What are your orders, Phillip?”

He swallowed, and I watched his throat work. “I’m to keep you safe here, that’s all.” His pulse was jumping under the bruised bite in his neck. He licked his lips, not seductive, nervous. He was lying to me. The trick was, how much of a lie and what about?

I heard Madge’s voice coming up the hall, all cheerful seduction. Such a good hostess. She escorted two people into the room. One was a woman with short auburn hair and too much eye makeup, like green chalk smeared above her eyes. The second was Edward, smiling, at his charming best, with his arm around Madge’s bare waist. She gave a rich, throaty laugh as he whispered something to her.

I froze, for a second. It was so unexpected that I just froze. If he had pulled out a gun, he could have killed me while I sat with my mouth hanging open. What the hell was he doing here?

Madge led him and the woman towards the bar. He glanced back at me over her shoulder and gave me a delicate smile that left his blue eyes empty as a doll’s.

I knew my twenty-four hours were not up. I knew that. Edward had decided to come looking for Nikolaos. Had he followed us? Had he listened to Phillip’s message on my machine?

“What’s wrong?” Phillip asked.

“What’s wrong?” I said. “You are taking orders from somebody, probably a vampire…” I finished the statement silently in my head: And Death has just waltzed in the door to play freak while he searches for Nikolaos. There was only one reason Edward searched for a particular vampire. He meant to kill her, if he could.

The assassin might finally have met his match. I had thought I wanted to be around when Edward finally lost. I wanted to see what prey was too large for Death to conquer. I had seen this prey, up close and personal. If Edward and Nikolaos met and she even suspected that I had a hand in it…shit. Shit, shit, shit!

I should turn Edward in. He had threatened me, and he would carry it out. He would torture me to get information. What did I owe him? But I couldn’t do it, wouldn’t do it. A human being does not turn another human being over to the monsters. Not for any reason.

Monica had broken that rule, and I despised her for it. I think I was the closest thing Edward had to a real friend. A person who knows who and what you are and likes you anyway. I did like him, despite or because of what he was. Even though I knew he’d kill me if it worked out that way? Yes, even though. It didn’t make much sense when you looked at it that way. But I couldn’t worry about Edward’s morality. The only person I had to face in the mirror was me. The only moral dilemma I could solve was my own.

I watched Edward play kissy-face with Madge. He was much better at role-playing than I was. He was also a much better liar.

I would not tell, and Edward had known I would not tell. In his own way, he knew me, too. He had bet his life on my integrity, and that pissed me off. I hate to be used. My virtue had become its own punishment.

But maybe, I didn’t know how yet, I could use Edward the way he was using me. Perhaps I could use his lack of honor as he used my honor now.

It had possibilities.

Chapter 26

The auburn-haired woman with Edward came over to the couch and slid into Phillip’s lap. She giggled and wrapped her arms around his neck with a little kick of her feet. Her hands didn’t wander lower, and she didn’t try to undress him. The night was looking up. Edward followed behind the woman like a blond shadow. There was a drink in his hand and a suitably harmless smile on his face.

If I hadn’t known him, I would never have looked at him and said, there, there is a dangerous man. Edward the Chameleon. He balanced on the couch arm at the woman’s back, one hand rubbing her shoulder.

“Anita, this is Darlene,” Phillip said.

I nodded. She giggled and kicked her little feet.

“This is Teddy. Isn’t he scrumptious?”

Teddy? Scrumptious? I managed a smile, and Edward kissed the side of her neck. She snuggled against his chest, managing to wiggle in Phillip’s lap at the same time. Coordination.

“Let me have a taste.” Darlene sucked her lower lip under her teeth and drew it out slowly.

Phillip’s breath trembled. He whispered, “Yes.”

I didn’t think I was going to like this.

Darlene cupped his arm in her hands and raised it to her mouth.

She bestowed a delicate kiss over one of his scars, then she slid her legs down between his until she was kneeling at his feet, still holding his arm. The full skirt of her dress was bunched up around her waist, caught on his legs. She was wearing red lace panties and matching garters. Color coordination.

Phillip’s face had gone slack. He was staring at her as she brought his arm towards her mouth. A small pink tongue licked his arm, quick, out, wet, gone. She glanced up at Phillip, eyes dark and full. She must have liked what she saw because she began to lick his scars, one by one, delicate, a cat with cream. Her eyes never left his face.

Phillip shuddered; his spine spasmed. He closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the couch. Her hands went to his stomach. She gripped the fishnet and pulled. It slid out of his pants, and her hands stroked up bare chest.

He jerked, eyes wide, and caught her arms. He shook his head. “No, no.” His voice sounded hoarse, too deep.

“You want me to stop?” Darlene asked. Her eyes were nearly closed, breath deep, lips full and waiting.

He was struggling to talk and make sense at the same time. “If we do this…that leaves Anita alone. Fair game. Her first party.”

Darlene looked at me, maybe for the first time. “With scars like that?”

“Scars are from a real attack. I talked her into the party.” He brought her hands out from under his shirt. “I can’t desert her.” His eyes seemed to be focusing again. “She doesn’t know the rules.”

Darlene leaned her head on his thigh. “Phillip, please, I’ve missed you.”

“You know what they’d do to her.”

“Teddy will keep her safe. He knows the rules.”

I asked, “You’ve been to other parties?”

“Yes,” Edward said. He held my gaze for several seconds while I tried to picture him at other parties. So this was where he got his information about the vampire world, through the freaks.

“No,” Phillip said. He stood, bringing Darlene to her feet, still holding her forearms. “No,” he said and his voice sounded certain, confident. He released her and held out his hand to me. I took it. What else could I do?

His hand was sweating and warm. He strode out of the room, and I was forced to half-run in my heels to catch up with my hand.

He led me down the hall to the bathroom and we went in. He locked the door and leaned against it, sweat beaded on his face, eyes closed. I took back my hand, and he didn’t fight me.

I looked around at the available seating and finally chose to sit on the edge of the bathtub. It wasn’t comfortable, but it seemed the lesser of two evils. Phillip drew in great gulps of air and finally turned to the sink. He ran water loud and splashing, dipped his hands in, and covered his face again and again until he stood, water dripping down his face. Droplets caught in his eyelashes and hair. He blinked at himself in the mirror over the basin. He looked startled, wide-eyed.