Daemons Are Forever

“Did you ever really feel anything for me?” said Freddie, almost whispering.

“Oh, I don’t know,” said Sebastian. “Perhaps. Sometimes. Sometimes…I’m more human than at other times. But it doesn’t matter. That’s all over now. There will be no room for real human emotions in the world that’s coming. You’ll love us because we’ll make you love us, to make the transition easier. But we won’t care. We are the Hungry Gods, the Many-Angled Ones. And you’re just food.”

Freddie turned away, as though Sebastian had hit him, and then he walked slowly away, not looking back.

“That was cruel,” I said to Sebastian.

“Have to be cruel to be kind,” Sebastian said briskly. “Now go away. I have nothing else to say to you. If there’s anything else you want to know about being a drone, ask Molly. Of course, you may not be able to trust her answers … as time goes on.”

He laughed at us. I took Molly by the arm and pulled her away, and we walked back through the isolation ward. All the drones came forward to the front of their tanks, and watched us intently through the steelglass, and all their expressions were exactly the same. They watched Molly, not me. She was staring straight ahead, lost in her own thoughts, and I don’t think she noticed. I hoped not.

“I didn’t know Sebastian and Freddie were gay,” she said finally.

“I don’t think Freddie’s ever been that discerning,” I said, glad of a chance to talk about something else. “He’d stick it in mud, if he thought it would wriggle. And Sebastian… would probably do whatever he thought was necessary. Freddie was always a serial romantic, couldn’t stand not to be in a relationship with someone. Anyone. Sebastian just used that, so he could use Freddie as cover. Poor bastard.”

“Sebastian knows about me,” said Molly. “Sooner or later, he will talk. When he thinks it’s to his advantage. And sooner or later, someone will listen, and believe. You know that.”

“That will take time,” I said. “And we only have three, four days till the Invaders come through. The family is going to be too busy to care about Sebastian’s ravings.”

We stopped as one of the armed guards approached us. Molly tensed and grabbed my arm. I did my best to look casual and unconcerned.

“We’ve had word from the man guarding Sebastian,” said the guard. “Apparently he has something else to say to you. Something important. But he’ll only say it to you two.”

“Probably just a trick,” said Molly. “Distract us with false information.”

I could tell how much she wanted out of the isolation ward, but I couldn’t just leave. Sebastian did know things; there was always the chance he could be manoeuvred into saying more than he intended. So we went back to Sebastian’s isolation cell, with Molly walking stiffly at my side. When we got there, he smiled sweetly at us, leaning at his ease on the heavy steelglass wall.

“I was infected long ago,” he said, without even bothering with any pleasantries this time. “You have no idea what it feels like, when the change really starts to kick in. It’s like being part of something bigger, something far more important and significant. I felt a real sense of purpose, of destiny, for the first time in my life. Being human is such a limited thing. Why should I regret leaving it behind, when I will become so much more? When the Hungry Gods come through, I shall be part of them, and glory in your destruction.”

“But you’re losing yourself,” I said. “Giving up everything you’ve made of yourself. That used to mean so much to you, Sebastian.”

“I never knew how small I was, until I was touched by the gods,” said Sebastian. “Why stay a caterpillar, when you can become a butterfly?”

“Butterflies don’t normally kill everything else in the field,” said Molly.

Sebastian smiled at her. “They would if they could. And so will you, Molly dear.”

“You said you had something important you wanted to tell us,” I said. “Spill it, or we’re leaving.”

“Oh yes… You’ve been very clever, Eddie, discovering and rounding up all the drones we infected during the battle on the Nazca Plain…But from now on, every time you come into contact with us, you’ll lose more people. No matter how many battles you win, we’ll take more of you, until there’s no one left. You don’t dare fight us, because if you do we’ll make you just like us.”

I smiled right back at him. “Well, you would say that, wouldn’t you?”

I took Molly back to our room. We both needed some down time. Time to think. I stretched out on the bed but, instead of joining me, Molly stood by the window, looking out over the grounds. The silence in the room seemed to grow stronger and heavier the longer it went on, but neither of us knew how to break it. I’d said I’d help her, said I’d save her, but I didn’t know what to do. I’d said I’d protect her from my own family if necessary, but we both knew the fate of all humanity had to come first. We both knew a lot of things, but neither of us wanted to be the first to say them.

“How do you feel?” I said at last, just to be saying something in that awful silence.

“I can feel the first changes,” she said, still looking out of the window. “Physical changes. My body feels…different. Uncertain. And there are strange thoughts in my head, that seem to come out of nowhere… My magics are keeping things under control, for now. I know so many spells, so many forbidden magics and secrets, but I never thought I’d need a weapon I could use against myself.”

“There must be someone who can help you,” I said. “All the places you’ve been, all the contacts you’ve made…”

“The price they’d ask would be worse than the affliction,” said Molly.

“Then, someone in the family,” I said. “We just need to stop or slow the changes till after the war. Till we can really go to work on it.”

“Who could we ask?” said Molly. “Who could we trust with a secret like this?”

“The Armourer,” I said. “Uncle Jack would understand. We had to kill his brother James, and he understood about that.”

“That was to save the family,” said Molly. “And I am becoming a real and present danger to the family. Who else is there?”

“I don’t know! How about the Blue Fairy? He owes me. Maybe he could fish for a cure. He found one for himself.”

“We can’t trust him. All elves have an agenda.”

“Well… maybe Giles could take you with him, back to his future,” I said desperately. “Who knows what kind of cures and medical technology they have then?”

“You heard the man,” Molly said sadly. “His is a strictly scientific future. His people probably wouldn’t even be able to recognise what was wrong with me. And anyway, we can’t unleash the Loathly Ones and the Hungry Gods on the future. They have to be stopped, here and now.”

I had to smile. “Am I hearing this right? The infamous Molly Metcalf, developing scruples and morality at this late stage?”

She turned around and managed a small smile for me. “Everyone has to grow up eventually. All it took for me was an other-dimensional parasite infecting my body and eating my soul.”

I sat up on the bed and looked at her thoughtfully. “Now you’re one of them… Are you part of their hive mind yet? Can you hear them? Can you listen in on the Loathly Ones’ communications?”

Molly frowned, concentrating. “There is something… on the edge of my thoughts. Far away, a background sound. But it’s just babble, a meaningless gabble of noise. Not human… alien. Perhaps I’ll come to understand it, as I become… more like them. Will my thoughts come to sound like that? So alien, so intrinsically other… as to be beyond human comprehension?” She looked at me intently. “We have to stop them, Eddie. While I’m still me. Maybe… if we drive them all back out of our reality, the infection will go with them.”

“Yes,” I said kindly. “Maybe.”

“I’m scared, Eddie. Scared of becoming less and less me, and becoming something that won’t even care what it’s lost. I won’t even care that I don’t love you anymore… If there is no cure, if there is no hope left, kill me, Eddie, while I still know who you are. If you love me, kill me.”