Full MoonCity

When she awoke, the room was light with morning, and she was alone. She sat up quickly and followed the scent of fresh coffee to the kitchen.

“Good morning,” she said cheerily, but froze at his baleful stare. “What’s wrong?”

He made a show of considering. “Nothing, I guess, if you don’t think it’s wrong to lie.” His brows came together. “Did you think I wouldn’t know? That you could get away with it? But, wait, why should you care? You got what you wanted: a night with the freak. Tell me, Miss Melly: did it live up to your expectations? Was it as exciting as you’d hoped?”

“It was good for me,” she said, feeling her cheeks get hot. “I thought you seemed to be enjoying yourself, too.”

“Don’t change the subject. If this was just about sex you could have told me the truth.”

“Oh, really? If I’d told you over barbecue that I wasn’t a werewolf, would you still have invited me back here?” She saw him wince. “What? Oh, the W-word. You don’t use it. I didn’t know.”

“Obviously.”

“An easy way to weed out the groupies and other liars?”

He shrugged.

“Okay, so you don’t like people like me. But you came to my meeting.”

“Um. Well-I just wasn’t quite sure. I didn’t want to prejudge, just in case. You know what that guy said-Mr. It’s-a-disease-about a code? That’s what I wondered. I thought it was just possible somebody else, one of my own kind, was trying to find me.”

She thought of the pack she’d seen when she was out riding. “But can’t you find each other when you’re, you know… I mean, you must meet each other all the time.”

He grimaced. “Hardly ‘all the time.’ Once a month, in our other forms. It’s rarely pla

There were so many questions she wanted to ask: why hadn’t his wolf materialized inside the house? Where did it appear, and could he control that location at all? How did it work? How much did he remember? But even if he’d lightened up a little, she didn’t think he’d put up with her questions for long. She watched as he poured himself a cup of coffee without offering her any or indicating that she should help herself.

She spoke as neutrally as she could. “If two people are in the same place, together, when the moon rises, their wolves will be in the same place.”

“Seems you know all about it.”

“No, I don’t, but I want to.”

“Oh, and I’m supposed to be grateful for your curiosity?” With a jerky movement suggesting he was repressing a more violent response, he set his mug down hard on the counter. “I’m not here to be your personal freak-show!”

Seeing the strong fingers of his empty hands, she felt a thrill of fear. “I don’t think you’re a freak. I think… I think you’re wonderful. I’ve never met anyone more… more… oh, please, Ari, I love you!”

She hadn’t meant to say it so soon or so bluntly, but there it was, her final throw of the dice; she had nothing else to offer.

His shoulders sagged, and he was unable to meet her gaze. “That’s a little dramatic, isn’t it?”

“It’s true.”

“You hardly know me.”

“What about last night? Doesn’t that count?”

She felt more confident now, knowing she’d disarmed him. Of course he didn’t love her yet, but he might come around to it in time. She already knew his secret, and, far from a barrier between them, it had brought them closer. It was true she’d lied to him at first, but since it had brought them together, surely that was forgivable?

She had been hovering in the doorway, but now she took a step forward. “You don’t have to share anything you don’t want to. I’m not asking for a big commitment, just a chance. I mean, why not? You can’t pretend you don’t like me-I mean, you asked me out.”

His eyes flashed. “Only because I thought you were someone else.”

That hurt a little. “Well, okay, but who’s being prejudiced now? Is that fair? You thought I was… like you. I’m not, but I’m still a nice person-”

He shook his head savagely. “I don’t mean I thought you were different-I thought you might be someone else. Someone I’d already met-just once-and really, really wanted to find again.”

She flashed on the “missed co

Her chest felt hollow as she understood. He was in love with someone else. “You thought maybe she was looking for you, too, and might use the same language I did: ‘Lonely werewolf, longs to run with pack.’ Not a code, because you don’t have a code, but almost.”

He nodded slowly. “I knew how unlikely it was, and I was pretty sure, really, as soon as I saw you that you weren’t… her… but… well, I’d been looking for her for so long, and you’re an attractive woman, and, let’s be frank, I was horny.” He shrugged. “Well, we’re both grown-ups. No need to apologize.”

“Love means never having to say you’re sorry,” she said, a bit hopelessly.

“I don’t love you, Mel.”

“And I don’t love you, either,” she snapped. “As you helpfully pointed out, I hardly know you. I could say the same about your lost love. You don’t even know her name or what she looks like. We’re both in love with fantasy figures.”

“Mine is real.”

“So is mine; I just haven’t met him yet.” She tried a gentler approach, softening her tone. “But look-we could still have fun together.”

“Like last night? I’m sorry, Mel, but even if it doesn’t creep you out, the idea-”

“So change me,” she said quickly. “I mean it! Make me like you. It’s what I want. Next month, you could bite me…”

He recoiled. “No!”

“Why not? If I ask you to-and then we could be together-”

“It doesn’t work like that! We’re not vampires, you know.”

“How does it work?”

But it was clear, from the hard look on his face, that he was not going to share any more secrets with her. “Forget it,” he said. “I’m not trying to make you feel worse, but there’s no future for us. It’s not your fault. Even if I could do it-even if you managed to change some other way-it wouldn’t change the way I feel. I’m sorry.”

There was no point in arguing about it; it was never possible to argue someone into love with you-she knew that all too well from being on the other side of these miserable, final conversations.

So she took her leave of him. He probably thought her heart was broken, and maybe it should have been after such a disappointing end. But in fact she felt quite ridiculously cheerful as she rode away from his house. She knew this was not the end, but only the begi