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She had never dreamed that she could come to like him, and more than that, to admire him. She had never dreamed that she would stop fighting the strong physical attraction she felt for him.
She had stopped fighting, she realized. She had stopped that afternoon, if not before. She could still feel the warmth of his hand on hers beneath her muff-the hand that was now spread on one of his thighs. She glanced at it. It was a slim, long-fingered hand, which nevertheless looked strong.
It was strange to realize that for a two-month period eight years before she had been betrothed to him. They had been within one month of their wedding when she had run off with Andrew. What would marrige to him have been like? she wondered. Performing those intimacies of marriage with him. Bearing his children. Sharing a home with him in the familiarity of everyday living.
She shivered and turned her attention to the rector.
Halfway through the lengthy sermon there was a slight rustling from the pews where the children sat. A few moments later Rupert wriggled his way between his mother and the marquess, yawned widely, and tried to find a comfortable spot for his head against her arm. She smiled down at him and marveled at how well all the other children were behaving. It was a long and a late service after a busy day.
Rupert's head fell forward and Judith lifted it gently back against her arm. Her son looked up at her with sleepy eyes. He should have stayed at the house with Kate, she thought. But of course he would have been mortally offended had she suggested any such thing.
And then the marquess's arm came about the boy's shoulders, drawing him away from her, and his other slid beneath Rupert's knees and he lifted him onto his lap and drew his head against his chest. Rupert was asleep almost instantly, his auburn curls bright against the dark green of Lord Denbigh's coat.
Andrew's child, Judith thought. Her husband's child cradled in the arms of the man she had jilted and never faced with either explanation or apology. The man who might have been her husband, the father of her children. She felt an almost overwhelming longing to move closer and to close her eyes and rest her head against his shoulder.
She was falling in love with him, she realized with sudden shock. No, perhaps it was already too late. She had fallen in love with him. With the Marquess of Denbigh. It was incredible. But it was true.
There was no longer any thought in her mind of the suspicions that had troubled her in London and again here at Denbigh.
"The dear little boy," Miss Edith Ha
The marquess was carrying Rupert, the child's head resting heavily on his shoulder.
"You must*ive him to me," Miss Ha
"Thank you, ma'am," Judith said, smiling.
"And I shall take that little one on my lap," Miss Frieda Ha
"Thank you, ma'am," Mr. Cornwell said, and he waited for the marquess's aunt to seat herself in the sleigh before laying in her lap the little girl who was sleeping in his arms. "This is Lily, ma'am. If she should wake up, you may assure her that her sister is quite safe with Mrs. Harrison and will
be home in no time at all. Lily becomes agitated when separated from her sister."
"Then we must squeeze her sister in between us," Miss Edith Ha
Violet climbed gratefully into the sleigh.
In the meantime, Sir William and Lady Tushingham had singled out two little boys whose eyes were large with fatigue and who, Lady Tushingham declared, reminded her very much of two of her dear nephews, now twenty-two and twenty-four years old, and had taken them on their laps in the other sleigh.
Mrs. Harrison arranged the remaining children into pairs and led the way home. There was loud excitement over the fact that they were to spend the night and all the next day and night at Denbigh Park.
"It's the feather pillows wot tickles me," Toby told a younger child. "Your 'ead sinks right through 'em to the bed."
"Last year we all 'ad gifts," Val said. "But I daresay the guv spent all 'is money last year."
"I remember the mince pies," Daniel said. "I ate 'leven."
"Ten," Joe said. "I counted. It was ten."
"It was 'leven, I betcha," Danial said, bristling. "You want to make somethin' out of it, Joe?"
"It was ten," Joe said.
"Someone is going to be hanging by ten toes over the nearest snowbank in a moment," Mr. Cornwell called sternly.
"I tell you what," Mr. Rockford said, walking among the children and sweeping up into his arms one little boy who was yawning loudly. "Tomorrow whenever you eat a mince pie, Daniel, you let me know and I will keep count. We will see if you can stuff ten or eleven into yourself."
"Twelve," Daniel said loudly. "I 'ave to beat last year's count, sir."
"His lordship's cook may well be in tears,'' Mr. Rockford said. "No mince pies left by the end of Christmas morning. Yes, lad, rest your head on my shoulder if you wish. Now I could tell you a story about mince pies that would have your hair standing on end…"
Amy took Mr. Cornwell's offered arm and walked behind the children with him.
"You must be tired, Amy," he said. "You have had a busy day and have done more walking than anyone else."
"Yes, I am," she said. "But I do not believe I have ever lived through a happier day, Spencer."
"Really?" he said. "You do not find it intolerable to be surrounded by children all day long, listening to their silliness and exasperated by their petty quarrels?"
"But I think of what their lives were like and what they would be like without your efforts and those of his lordship and Mrs. Harrison," she said, "and I could hug them all until their bones break."
"Impossible!" He chuckled. "You are just a little bird, Amy. You would not have the strength to crack a single bone."
"I have always hated even thinking of the poor," she said. "Their plight has always seemed so hopeless, the problem too vast. And I could cry even now when I think of all the thousands of children who might be with us here but are not. But there are twenty very happy children here, Spencer, and that is better than nothing."
"You like children," he said, patting her hand. "I have watched you today talking with them. That is sometimes the most neglected part of our job. There is always so much to do and so much talking to be done to them as a group. I do not always find as much time as I would like to talk with them individually."
"They have such fascinating stories to tell," she said.
He looked down at her. "And all of them quite unfit for a lady's ears, I have no doubt," he said. "I should not have encouraged you to spend a day with us."
"A lady's ears are altogether underused," she said, provoking another chuckle from him. "Perhaps we should be told more of these stories by our governesses or at school
and spend a little less time dancing or sketching or learning how to converse in polite society."
"My dear Amy," he said, patting her hand again, "we will be making a radical out of you and scandalizing your family."
"Is caring about children being radical?" she asked.