The Unusual Suspects

"Of course, Mr. Canis," Gra

Elvis whined when he saw that the family was leaving him in the car.

"Elvis, we're not leaving you in the car. We're putting you in charge of it," Daphne said. The dog lifted his huge ears as if he was listening very carefully. "It's a really important job. You have to stay and guard Mr. Canis. Don't let anything bad happen to him."

Elvis barked, confirming his orders. He sat up in the backseat and watched out the windows for any would-be attackers. As the Grimms approached the mansion, Sabrina looked back and noticed Canis doing something very odd. The stick-thin man climbed on top of the car and sat Indian-style on the roof. He closed his eyes and rested his hands on his knees.

"What's he doing?" Sabrina asked.

"Meditative yoga," Gra

Of course, the Big Bad Wolf does yoga, Sabrina thought. Why did I even bother to ask?

The trio stood on the front steps of the mansion, but before Gra

"Good evening," he said and, without offering to take their coats, he turned and raced up the staircase. "I'll get the mayor."

"What do you think he wants?" Daphne wondered.

"Hard to say," Gra

"Maybe he felt like he didn't get to insult us enough at the school," Sabrina muttered just as Charming appeared at the top of the steps. Sabrina watched him grimace, then take a deep breath as he came down to join them.

"This conversation must be an absolute secret," he said as he stood before them. He leaned down and pi

"What's this?" she asked as Charming pi

"May I?" Charming said to Gra

"I don't think I understand what is taking place, Mayor Charming," Gra

"I'm deputizing you," he said uncomfortably. "Raise your right hand and repeat after me."

Charming raised his right hand and waited for the Grimms to do the same. Sabrina stared blankly at the man, wondering if maybe he was pulling some kind of prank on them.

"Don't make this harder on me than it has to be," he begged. "The town needs your help. You know it and I know it. Can't that be enough?"

"You want our help?" Sabrina said.

"I know you've been helping Hamstead," the mayor said. "For some reason the sheriff thinks you will be able to help with this case."

"Mayor Charming!" Gra

The man lowered his right hand and groaned. "Do you think I would ask you if it wasn't absolutely necessary? I swore I'd see your family rot before I asked for your help, but drastic times call for drastic measures."

"What are you talking about?" Sabrina demanded impatiently, but as she waited for the mayor to answer, she noticed something odd about the mansion. It was filthy. Several curtains in the ballroom had fallen and lay in heaps on the floor. A giant red stain had ruined a polar bear rug lying near the fireplace. The carpet on the stairs needed a good vacuuming and a bucket sat on the floor collecting rain from a giant patched-up hole in the ceiling. Half a dozen overflowing bags of garbage sat by the door waiting to be taken out and a thick layer of dust covered everything, including a full suit of armor that leaned precariously against a wall.

"What happened here?" she asked.

"You happened here!" Charming snapped. "You and your smelly sister ruined the only fund-raising event this town has each year."

Daphne raised an arm to smell her armpit. She crinkled her nose and lowered her arm quickly. "I'm not that bad," she said.

"You crashed an invitation only party, brought a giant here, which nearly destroyed the mansion and several cars in the parking lot, and worst of all, you made me look like a fool in front of the town's biggest donors," the mayor said. "We didn't raise a pe

"We know what the fund-raiser is really for," Sabrina replied. "You want to use the money to buy the whole town. Why don't you just dip into the money you've co

"You dare question my honor?" Charming growled. "I haven't taken a pe

Gra

"Services had to be cut drastically. Transportation, education. I've even had to fire the crew of workers who polish statues of me in the park. Mr. Seven has agreed to a substantial cut in pay and I haven't taken a salary in weeks. I had to lay off three-fourths of the town's police force, which, since there were only four police officers to begin with, leaves me with Hamstead. The sheriff works hard and he's smart as a whip, but he's only one pig. We're stretched too thin, and we just don't have the resources to investigate a crime, let alone a murder committed by the Scarlet Hand. I need your help, and since most of this is your family's fault, I think it's your responsibility."

"So now the Scarlet Hand exists, huh? Why did you lie about it back at the school?" Sabrina asked.

"Because I don't need the citizens of this town to panic. If word got out that there was a terrorist group killing people, there would be chaos in the streets. Hamstead can barely keep up now with speeding tickets and jaywalkers. Your family has proven to be good detectives: you're persistent and lucky and stubborn," Charming continued. "If you don't stop whatever did that to the teacher, then it won't get stopped."

"Why do you care what happens to a human teacher?" Sabrina said. "I thought you hated humans."

Charming said nothing.

"You don't want anything bad to happen to Ms. White," Daphne cried. "You are in love with her. You want to kiss and hug her!"

"Nonsense!" the mayor shouted. "I can't have terrorists ru

"You want to write her love notes," the little girl persisted. "You want to hold her hand in the park and look at puppies in the pet store."

"Is there an Off button for this one?" Charming asked Gra

The old woman gri

"All right!" Charming surrendered. "Snow has a knack for getting in trouble. I would sleep better at night knowing she is safe."

"Of course, we'll do what we can," Gra

"What are you going to do for us?" Sabrina asked.

The old woman looked at the girl in horror. "Liebling, we would never take payment for helping folks."

"Gra

"What can I do?" Charming said. "I can't exactly send Hamstead to search everyone's homes."

"No, but you have co

Charming thought for a moment. "You have my word."

He raised his right hand.