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"Nowhere. Go back to sleep, De
The rain pattered on the fly in an uneven tattoo. She remained sitting up, looking at him in the faint light from the opening. She could see little more than the whites of his eyes, staring straight up at nothing.
"Please Tosh, tell me. When I woke up and you weren't in your sleeping bag…" Her voice trailed off as he turned to look back at her. The difference that had grown in Toshio Iwashika the last week or so was never more manifest than in his narrowed expression, than in this slitted intensity in his eyes.
She heard him sigh finally. "All right, De
De
Toshio shrugged. "There was something I had to find out."
"But how could you get in and out without being caught?"
Toshio rolled over onto one elbow. She saw a brief flash of white as he smiled slightly. "A middie sometimes knows things even the engineering officers never find out, De
De
Toshio frowned. Now De
She lay down and faced him, using her arm as a pillow. She thought for a moment, then whispered. "What did you find out?"
Toshio closed his eyes. "You might as well know," he said. "I'll want you to tell Gillian in case I can't get through to her in the morning. I found out what Takkata-Jim is doing with those bombs he took from Charlie.
"He's converting them to fuel for the longboat."
De
"I don't know! I'm not even sure we have to do anything about it. After all, in a couple weeks his accumulators would be recharged enough to lift him off anyway. Maybe Gillian doesn't care.
"On the other hand, it might be darned important. I still haven't figured it all out yet. I may have to do something pretty drastic."
He had seen the partially dismantled bombs through the thick window of the security door to the longboat's specimen lab. Getting to them would be considerably more difficult than simply sneaking back aboard.
"Whatever happens," he tried to reassure her, "I'm sure it will all be all right. You just make certain your notes are all packed properly in the morning. That data on the Kiqui is the second most important thing to come out of this crazy odyssey, and it's got to get back. Okay?"
"Sure, Tosh."
He let gravity pull him over onto his back. He closed his eyes and breathed slowly to feign sleep.
"Toshio?"
The young man sighed. "Yes, De
"Um, it's about Sah'ot. He's only leaving to escort me. Otherwise I think you'd have a mutiny on your hands."
"I know. He wants to stay and listen to those underground 'voices' of his." Toshio rubbed his eyes, wondering why De
"Don't shrug them off like that, Tosh. He says Creideiki listened to them, too, and that he had to cut the cha
"The captain is a brain-damaged cripple." The words were bitter. "And Sah'ot is an egocentric, unstable…"
"I used to think so too," De
"Mmmph," Toshio commented sleepily. "What is it? More about the metal-mounds being alive?"
De
"All that clever adaptation and energy expended to dig a grave for itself?" Toshio cut in.
"No! Not a grave! A cha
Toshio tried earnestly to pay attention, but his thoughts kept drifting — to bombs, to traitors, to worry over Akki, his missing comrade, and to a man somewhere far to the north, who deserved to have someone waiting for him if — when he finally returned to his island launching point.
"… only thing wrong is there's no way I see that such a life form could have evolved! There's no sign of intermediate forms, no mention of any possible precursors in the old Library records on Kithrup… and this is certainly unique enough a life form to merit mention!"
"Mmm-hmmm."
De
She lay there watching him in the dimness. She wanted to shake him and make him listen to her!
Why am I pestering him like this. She suddenly asked herself. Sure, the stuff's important, but it's all intellectual, and Toshio's got our corner of the world on his shoulders. He's so young, yet he's carrying a fighting man's load now.
How do I feel about that?
A queasy stomach told her. I'm pestering him because I want attention.
I want his attention she corrected. In my clumsy way I've been trying to give him opportunities to…
Nervously, she faced her own foolishness.
If I, the older one, can get my signals this crossed, I can hardly expect him to figure out the cues, she realized at last.
Her hand reached out. It stopped just short of the glossy black hair that lay in long, wet strands over his temples. Trembling, she looked again at her feelings, and saw only fear of rejection holding her back.
As if on a will of its own, her hand moved to touch the soft stubble on Toshio's cheek. The youth started and turned to look at her, wide-eyed.
"Toshio," she swallowed. "I'm cold."