Gump & Company

Lieutenant Dan says he knows he is technically unfit for military service, but he is sort of hangin around, waitin for his chance to do somethin useful.

When he finds out I'm with a mechanized armored outfit, he is overjoyed.

"That's just what I need—transportation! Legs or no legs, I can kill A-rabs good as anybody else" is how he puts it.

Anyway, we gone over to the Casbah, or whatever they call it, an got Sue a banana, an me an Lieutenant Dan ate soup that had toad larva or somethin in it. "Y'know," he says, "I sure wish these A-rabs had some oysters, but I bet there ain't one within a thousand miles of here."

"What?" I ast. "A-rabs?"

"No, you stupo, oysters," says Dan.

In any case, by the end of the afternoon Dan had talked me into takin him back to my tank company. Before I took him in the compound, I gone to the quartermaster an drawn two more sets of fatigue uniforms, one for Dan an one for Sue. I am figgerin it might take some explainin about ole Sue, but that we would give it a try, anyhow.

As it turned out, nobody much give a shit that Lieutenant Dan has joined us. In fact, some fellers are glad to have him around, since besides Sergeant Kranz an me, he is the only other person in our outfit to have had any real combat experience. Whenever he is in public, Dan now wears the artificial legs, just suckin it up when they hurt him. Says it ain't military to go crawlin around or ridin in a cart. Also, most of the fellers taken a shine to Sue, who has turned into quite a scrounger. Whatever we need to have to steal from somebody else, Sue is the man for the job.

Ever night we set out in front of our tent an watch the Scud missiles that Saddamn Hussein is shooting at us. Most of the time, they is blowed up in the air by our own missiles, an it is all like a big fireworks show, with occasional accidents.

One day the battalion commander come around an call us all together.

"Arright, men," he says. "Tomorrow we go

That night I walked out away from camp a little bit, right to the edge of the desert. I have never seen a sky so clear as over the desert—seemed like every star in the heaven was shinin brighter than ever before. I begun to say a little prayer that nothin would happen to me in the battle, cause for the first time in my life, I got a responsibility to take care of.

That day, I had got a letter from Mrs. Curran, sayin she was gettin too ole an sick to take care of little Forrest. She says she is go

"I really feel sorry about this," Mrs. Curran writes, "but there's nothing else I can do. I'm sure you'll come home soon, Forrest, and everything will be okay."

Well, I feel pretty sorry for Mrs. Curran, too. She done all she could. But my heart don't feel good that I can do anythin to help, even if I do get home in one piece. I mean, look at my record so far. Anyway, I am thinkin about all this when all of a sudden from out of the desert, a kind of whirlwind comes blowin up toward me. It whirled an blew under the clear desert stars, an then, before I knowed it, there was Je

"Well," she says, "looks like you've done it again, huh?"

"Done what?"

"Got your ass in a sling. Aren't you go

"Yup, that's what the orders are."

"What if something happens to you?"

"What happens, happens," I said.

"And little Forrest?"

"I been thinkin about that."

"Yeah, I know. But you don't have any plan, do you?"

"Not yet. I gotta get outta this mess, first."

"I know that, too. And I can't tell you what's go

"Oh, I will," I says. "He is the best combat leader there is."

"Well, just pay attention to him, okay?"

I nodded, an then Je

"That German girl—I like her." Je

I tried to say somethin, but my words caught up in my throat, an then the whirlwind gone on its way, an I am left alone under the desert sky.

I ain't never seen nothin like what I saw next dawn, an I hope I don't ever see it again.

Far as the eye could see out in the desert, from horizon to horizon, our tanks an perso

At daybreak the order is given to move forward an kick Saddamn Hussein's A-rabs' asses out of Kuwait. An that's what we done.

Me an Sergeant Kranz, who has now been promoted to corporal, an Lieutenant Dan are in command of one of the tanks. Also, we has brought ole Sue along for good luck. Now, these tanks is not at all like the tanks we had in Vietnam, which were as simple to run as a tractor. But that was twenty-five years ago. Nosiree, these tanks look like the inside of a spaceship, with all sorts of computers an calculators an electrical stuff flashin an beepin. They even got air-conditionin.

We is in the first wave of attack, an afore long, we has spotted Saddamn Hussein's army in front of us, cept they are goin backwards. Sergeant Kranz done fired a few rounds from our big gun an Lieutenant Dan done pushed the throttle forward to maximum speed. Seems like we is actually skimmin over the desert, an all around us ever tank has opened fire an pretty soon the whole land is alive with big explosions. The noise is frightful, an ole Sue's got his fingers stuck in his ears.

"Wahoooo!" shouts Lieutenant Dan. "Lookit them bastards run!"

It was true. Seems like we is out in front of the whole pack. Ole Saddamn's army is flyin off like a huge covey of quail, leavin everthin behind, vehicles, clothes, stolen cars an furniture from Kuwait. At one point we done crossed a big long bridge an just afore we got to the end of it, one of our own jet planes dives down an blows it in half. We got to the other end in the nick of time, afore the whole thing collapsed down into a gorge!

When I look back through the mirror, I can see we is well ahead of everbody an was about to get on the radio to ast for instructions, when a big ole sandstorm blowed up in the desert in front, an in no time, we was engulfed inside it. Then the radio went dead.

"You reckon we oughta stop an wait for somebody to tell us what to do?" I ast.

"Hell, no," says Dan. "We got them bastids on the run—Let's keep em there!"

So that's what we did. We was in the sandstorm all day an most of the night. Couldn't see two feet in any direction, or tell if it was night or day, but we kep on goin. Couple of times we passed stalled-out tanks of Saddamn Hussein's army an refilled our fuel tanks from em.