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Joh
“Then let’s go.”
Marvellous acceleration, the Ford Fiesta. Simply marvellous.
Icarus swerved out of the parking bay and then took off at the hurry-up.
Joh
“Yes, well I thought they probably would.”
“Faster,” cried Joh
Now, it does have to be said, what with Hollywood knowing its own business best, and everything, that the “car chase in the multi-storey car park” never seems to lose its popularity. Those “hilly streets with the trams in San Francisco” are always good, of course. And the “racing under the big overpass jobbies in Brooklyn” and the “swervy mountain roads in France”, which are usually filmed in California, and the “out on the freeway in the desert” of course. Also in California. But the “car chase in the multi-storey car park” (or parking structure, as our American cousins like to call it) never ceases to impress. Lazlo Woodbine actually considered adding one more location to his set of four, that of the “parking structure, where a dodgy drugs deal is being done with racketeers”. But he decided to scrub round it, because it was far too dangerous a location to work. What with all the car chases going on.
And everything.
Icarus did some more swerving and headed down the exit ramp. The long dark car came creeping slowly after him.
“We’re losing them,” said Joh
“I think not,” said Icarus. “It has probably occurred to them, as it has occurred to me, that I don’t have a ticket. I don’t know how we’re going to get out of this car park.”
“Oh dear,” said Joh
“Possibly.” Icarus leaned over and whispered words into Joh
“Do you think that might work?” asked the small man.
“I’d give it a go,” said Icarus. “I can’t think of anything else.”
“Okey-dokey then.”
The Ford Fiesta moved across the first floor of the multi-storey car park and then rather than going down the exit ramp it went up again. Up to the second floor, all round that, then up to the third floor and all round that. The long dark automobile followed it.
The driver wasn’t smiling.
The Ford Fiesta went down to the second floor again and then up two floors to the fourth. The long dark automobile followed the Ford Fiesta. Losing sight, then gaining sight of it again.
The driver had a definite frown on.
The Ford Fiesta went down to the third floor, then up to the fifth, then down to the second again. The long dark automobile followed it.
The driver had a snarl on now.
“What are they doing?” he shouted. He was an evil-looking man, the driver of the long dark automobile. He wore a chauffeur’s uniform and looked exactly the way that evil chauffeurs always look. Even down to that business with the chin and the unusual birthmark above the right eyebrow, which resembles the Penang peninsula. “What are they doing?” he shouted again. “Driving up and down and round and round until they run out of petrol?”
“Cut them off,” said a man in the back. An unseen man, so description wasn’t necessary. “Park the car across the exit ramp on the third floor.”
“But they’re in a Ford Fiesta, sir. It might scratch our bodywork if it bumps into us.”
“Just do it.”
“Yes, sir.”
The Ford Fiesta went up to the fifth floor again and then came down. The long dark car was blocking the third floor exit ramp. The chauffeur was sitting on the bo
“Here they come,” shouted the chauffeur, raising his pistol. “Stop or I fire, you sons of …”
The Ford Fiesta didn’t stop.
“Stop or I fire! Stop or I fire!”
The Ford Fiesta didn’t stop.
“Stop or I—” The driver leapt from the bo
Well, struck it is not exactly the word.
Passed right through it is. But that’s four words.
“Aaagh!” went the chauffeur as the Ford Fiesta merged into the long dark automobile, emerged from the other side, drove on round the third floor and then went up to the fifth again.
Down on the ground floor the Ford Fiesta had reached the ticket barrier. “Nice work,” said Icarus to Joh
Joh
“So let’s be off on our way.”
The bloke who worked in the little ticket office next to the barrier gri
“Lost ticket?” he said. “That will be fifty guineas, please.”
9
“Fifty guineas?” said Icarus Smith. “Fifty guineas?”
The car park attendant wore a uniform. It didn’t fit at all well. They never do.
“Fifty guineas?” said Icarus again. “What do you take me for?”
“A noble bachelor,” said the bloke in the ill-fitting uniform. “And who’s this? Your little brother is it?”
“I wish it was,” said Icarus. “I have a brother, but he’s barking mad.”
“I’m getting madder by the moment,” said Joh
“Come on,” said Icarus. “Let’s go.”
Icarus Smith and Joh
“What are we going to do?” asked Joh
Icarus gathered up the papers and the boxes of tablets and the spectremeter. “No,” said he. “I think we’ll just walk from here.”
Down the exit ramp from the first floor came the long dark automobile.
“On second thoughts,” said Icarus, “I think we’ll run.”
Joh
“Brentford,” said he. “And fast, please.”
“Ah, you again,” said the cabbie. “And with your mate out of the box, this time. Hop in then and I’ll tell you some more about the knowledge.”
On the journey back to Brentford, which was not achieved in quite the speedy ma
“What an interesting man,” said Joh
“Fascinating,” said Icarus Smith.
“But I think he was wrong about turning left in Arnold Layne,” said Joh
“This is a pub,” said Icarus.
“Yes, well, I can see it’s a pub.”
“It’s called the Three Gables and I’m supposed to be meeting my best friend, Friend Bob, here tonight. I’m going to tell him everything.”
“Do you think that’s wise?”
“Absolutely,” said Icarus. “In movies, people always keep things to themselves until the last minute. It heightens the tension. Personally I don’t need any more heightened tension today.”
“You’re go
“That’s why I want to be with Friend Bob when I take it.”
Joh