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'Well, she does seem kind of committed to her bed, Suvinder.'
'I know.' He shivered. 'That is what's so scary.'
He did touch me that evening, but only in a friendly, companionable way, taking my arm as we walked to our respective rooms. No attempt at a kiss or anything. Just as well: I was set for a struggle with that damn hammock, though once I was in it was very comfortable.
The next day was the last. We headed back towards Thuhn on a fine, clear, cold day and had a picnic lunch in the ruins of the old monastery at Trisuhl.
Langtuhn Hemblu unpacked the little table and two chairs, set the places, arranged the food and brewed a pot of Earl Grey tea, then went off to visit a relation who lived nearby.
The trees growing within the walls rustled where their tops stuck out into the light breeze, and little rose finches and redstarts hopped and jumped around us, almost but not quite accepting morsels of food from my hand. Choughs called out, their cries echoing in the empty shell of walls.
Suvinder chattered a little, and spilled some tea on the table, which was not like him. I felt content and harmonious with everything. I had mixed feelings about heading back to Thuhn and I was surprised to find that, while I was certainly looking forward to getting back to my e-mails and phones, if anything — given the chance — I'd have chosen to continue the tour round Thulahn. But, then, it was a small country. There was not much more to see, perhaps. And I'd been lucky to have had the undivided attention of somebody with as many responsibilities and calls upon his time as the Prince.
It was the sort of time when it paid to remember what Mrs Telman had said, back in the hotel room at Vevey that night. Appreciate at the time, enjoy the moment, count your blessings.
'Kathryn,' Suvinder said, placing his teacup down. Somehow, I just knew we were suddenly in formal territory.
I turned from feeding the little birds to sit square and upright. Plumped up in our thermal jackets, we faced each other across the little table.
'Your Highness,' I said. I clasped my hands on the table.
He addressed them rather than my face. 'Have you enjoyed the last few days?'
'Immensely, Suvinder. One of the best holidays I've ever had.'
He looked up, smiling. 'Really?'
'Of course really. How about you?'
'What?'
'Have you enjoyed yourself?'
'Well, of course.'
'There you are, then. Hurrah for us.'
'Yes. Yes.' He was looking at my hands again. 'You have enjoyed my company, I hope?'
'Very much indeed, Prince. You've been the perfect host. I'm very grateful for your time. I feel very…favoured. I just hope your subjects don't resent me monopolising you for so long.'
He waved one hand dismissively. 'Good. Good, I…I'm glad to hear that. Very glad to hear that. Kathryn, I…' He exhaled suddenly, an exasperated expression on his face, and sat back, slapping the table. 'Oh, this is no good. I will come right out with it.' He looked me in the eye.
And, dolt that I am, I swear that I still had absolutely no idea what was coming next.
'Kathryn,' he said, 'will you marry me?'
I stared at him. For a while. 'Wi — Will I…?' I said, eloquently. Then I felt my eyes narrow. 'Are you serious?'
'Of course I am serious!' the Prince squeaked, then looked surprised. 'Of course,' he said, in a normal voice.
'I…I…Suvinder…Prince…I…'
He searched my eyes. 'Oh, dear, this has been a complete surprise to you, hasn't it?'
I nodded. 'Well, ah, yes.' I gulped. 'I mean, it is.'
'Have I made a complete fool of myself, Kathryn?' he asked, his gaze dropping.
'Prince, I…' I took a deep breath. How do you really, clearly, kindly say to someone you've come to like — even like quite a lot — that you just don't love them and so, no, of course you don't want to marry them? 'No, of course you haven't made a fool of yourself, Suvinder. I'm very, very flattered that you —'
He turned sideways in his seat, crossing his legs and arms and casting his gaze to the sky. 'Oh, Prince,' I said, recalling the drunken call in Blysecrag a few weeks earlier. 'I know people have said this sort of thing to you before, used these words. But I mean it. I'm not just trying to be kind. I like you a lot, and I know how much you must have…but hold on. I mean, you can't marry a commoner anyway, can you?'
'I can marry whom I like,' he said resentfully, scratching at the tablecloth with one fingernail as though trying to remove an invisible stain. 'My mother and anybody else can go hang. Tradition implies I must marry a princess or someone similar, but there is nothing but this…succession of precedents. From an age when there were many more princesses around. This is the twentieth century. My God, it is almost the twenty-first century. I am not unpopular. I have taken the precaution, even though I have resented it, of gauging the reaction of people to you. Ordinary people seem to like you. My ministers do. The Rinpoche Beies was most taken with you and thought we would be most happy. So it would be a popular match.' He sighed. 'But I should have known.'
'Hold on, they don't know, do they?'
He glanced at me. 'Of course. Well, not the ordinary people. But I told the cabinet members in the plane on the way to Thuhn, and the Rinpoche before the reception the other night.'
'Oh, my god.' I sat back, stu
'What about your mother?'
'Her I was leaving till later,' Suvinder admitted.
An appalling suspicion began to form in my mind. 'Who else knows?' I asked, keeping my voice cold and flat.
He turned to me. ' A few people. Not many. All most discreet.' He sounded bitter as he said, 'Why? Are you so ashamed that I have asked you to marry me?'
'I said I was flattered. I think I still am, but I mean does anybody in the Business know?'
He looked defensive. 'I don't know. No, I mean, one or two, perhaps, knew that I, that I might…' His voice trailed off.
I stood up. 'This was all meant, wasn't it?'
He rose too, reaching out to take my hands in his while his napkin fell to the grass. 'Oh, Kathryn!' he cried. 'Do you really think so?'
I jerked my hands away. 'No, by the Business, you idiot!'
He looked mystified and hurt. 'What do you mean?'
I stood there and looked very carefully into his eyes. There was a lot of stuff going through my mind in those moments, none of it nice and some of it positively paranoid. So this was what they meant by thinking on your feet. 'Prince,' I said eventually, 'is this the way the Business makes sure that Thulahn is really theirs? By having me marry you? Did they suggest this? Did any of them — Dessous, Cholongai, Hazleton - did they even hint that this might be a good idea?'
Suvinder looked as if he was about to weep. 'Well, not…'
'Not in so many words?' I suggested.
'Well, I think they know I…that I have very strong feelings for you. I did not…And they did not…'
I don't think I have ever seen a man look so abject.
Sometimes you just have to trust your feelings. I reached out and took his hand. 'Suvinder, I'm sorry that the answer is no. I like you, and I hope you will stay my friend, and I accept that it was a sincere offer, from the heart. And I'm sorry I called you an idiot.'
His eyes glistened as they looked at me. He gave a small and sorry smile, then lowered his head until I couldn't see his eyes. 'I'm sorry I didn't protest when you did,' Suvinder mumbled at the table. I looked down at the white tablecloth, in the man's shadow, directly under his face. A clear droplet hit the linen surface, darkening it and spreading. He turned away with a sniff and walked off a little way, pulling a handkerchief from his pocket.