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Slowly, I walked over and closed the door.
5
In the time immediately following, I sat in the armchair she had sat in and drank down the beer she hadn't finished. It was lukewarm, slightly bitter. I held the glass until I finished the last drop. Then I turned off the lights.
There was a noise on the balcony-shashasha-like footsteps. When I went to have a look, there was nothing but a rope dangling over the eaves, swinging to and fro in the breeze. It was raining outside again, a light rain. I stuck my hand out for a good while. It was barely wet.
The tu
I was exhausted and went to bed yet couldn't fall asleep. There was movement on the roof, as though someone were walking. I wished I could hear a cat's screech, that sort of piercing screech.
My stuff was spread all around the room, surrounding me. I remembered she said she was like a boat. Now I was a boat stranded on this island. At this point, all the boats in the world might be on an island. I wanted to make a phone call. I glanced at the clock; it was too late. I was overcome with the desire to call, the desire to listen.
"Twelve fifty-six a.m., twelve fifty-six a.m., twelve fifty-six A.M…"
I waited until "one a.m." before hanging up. The voice a
I decided I'd better get up and go knock on the door of 602. I could say I was locked out when the wind slammed the door shut.
The sound of the wind slamming the door shut was deafening. It frightened me.
6
I knocked softly. No response. I knocked for a long time; I was getting desperate. I figured she had no reason to open up. Maybe she was frightened, too. Or maybe she didn't hear it. I couldn't very well pound on the door. Late at night, any sound at all can be a soul-shattering experience.
I started to feel despondent. That's when the door opened.
"It's open." She gave it a jerk. I wondered if I should follow her into 602. "Come on in, you."
"I was locked out by the wind. I wanted to check with you to see if there's any way to cross the river at this time of night. Also, could you lend me some money?"
She took a look at my pajamas, shook her head, and smiled.
"Come on in." She closed the door behind me.
The light flickered on. I saw a bed, a table, and a few chairs. The blankets were spread out on the bed. The pillow displayed the imprint of a head.
"I'll go heat up some water."
I looked at the empty room, then moved the two chairs up to the bed, folded the blankets against the wall, and rested the pillow against the blankets. Then I leaned against the pillow, propped up my feet on the chair, and waited for her.
"Do you want an ashtray?"
I said no.
"I need a cigarette, but I'm out. Do you still have some?" she asked.
She put the ashtray on top of a book and placed it on the sheet near me.
"Not on me."
"Well, how about going back and getting them?"
By the time I got the cigarettes, she was leaning against the folded blankets, her feet propped up on the other chair.
"My place isn't as nice as yours."
"It's fine."
"I often don't sleep a wink the whole night. How about you?"
"I fall asleep after midnight."
"I'm used to it by now. How about you?"
"Me, too."
She kept at her cigarette, I at mine. We shared the ashtray between us. There was something peculiar about the way she smoked. The ash grew very long until it fell off; then she suddenly remembered to tap it.
"The water's boiling. I'm going to take a bath. Make yourself at home."
After she left, I pulled the book out from under the ashtray. It was a medical book, Internal Medicine, quite a thick volume, written by some American and translated into Chinese. The book opened to the section on hepatitis. Since I had no interest in anything to do with the liver, I closed the book and put it back under the ashtray.
The sound of water drifted in like waves. Listening to it made me feel lonely. I walked to the bathroom and gave the door a nudge. It yielded. She was squatting in the tub, soaping herself, her back slightly bent. I took the soap and lathered her up. Then I scrubbed her back and rinsed it off. I very much wanted to rub her shoulders, so I reached out my hand.
Her skin was very white, glossy, too. She had a very attractive body; the only imperfection was an ugly navel. And the navel is a person's core.
"Do you want to take a bath, too?"
"Not really."
I gazed at her while she washed, until she put on her nightgown.
We went back to the bed and sat down.
"What's the date?" she asked.
"I can't remember. It's Sunday."
"Today even God is taking a break."
Only God was taking a break. We mortals, how could we ever take a break?
There was the sound of soft footsteps on the roof.
"Don't be afraid. It comes every day. Once you've been here a while, you'll get used to it. Don't pay it any mind."
"What is it?"
"Don't know. Maybe it's a person. Then again, maybe not."
She took away the ashtray and covered us both with a blanket. "It's late. Sleepy?"
I closed my eyes and answered that if I could fall asleep, I would do it just like this, and she shouldn't wake me up.
"You won't be able to fall asleep."
"Then talk to me. About anything at all. I'm listening."
7
"I'm a virgin. Believe me?"
I shook my head.
"How could I be?" She stroked her own face. "Yet sometimes I like to think I am."
I nodded. "Then you are."
"For a while, I used to think that sexual differences were very interesting. I was moved by the whole idea of sexual differences among humans. Later on, I changed my mind."
"Same here."
"You and I are not the same."
I said we were in this respect.
"I'm a woman. How could you be the same as me?" She gave me a sly smile.
"But I'm human."
She said, "This bed hasn't been sat on by two people for a long time." She said, "The last time was half a year ago. A long time."
I listened.
She said, "Before me, the last person who sat on it was also a woman."
I had seen her emerge from the bath, seen her walk out of the bathroom, and I knew she didn't have any makeup on. Yet her face looked as though it were forever enveloped in a white fog. Her neck was lovely, a delicate curve rounded to her shoulders, which were wider than most other women's, not so slanting.
"Am I pretty?"
"Yes."
"Would you like to hold me?"
I ceremoniously held her for a moment, then let go.
The cigarette was bitter, the night too long. The rain was probably still coming down. Inside this room, I couldn't hear the traffic from the streets, couldn't hear anything. Except the intermittent footsteps on the roof.
She fetched another lamp and turned the shade toward the wall.
"Do you know where I was just now?"
I shook my head.
"I took a bus to Huangpu West and then walked back through the tu
"Is it allowed?"
"There was nobody there. Altogether, only two cars went by. It was pitch-black inside the cars. Couldn't see a thing."
"Weren't you afraid?"
"How could I be? The ground was also damp, sort of slippery."
I was reminded of the old stain on the porch downstairs.