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Byron and Bysshe came into the room, followed by Polidori. “What was that about fire?” Byron asked me. “We have need of one here. Can one be lit?”
“It would have been cold enough in those dungeons.” Bysshe had gone over to the window. “And there is another storm coming. Thank God we are off the lake.”
There was a sudden flash, followed by a roll of thunder. Byron called out for wine, and showed every sign of joyful anticipation. The gathering storm clouds darkened the room in which we were sitting and the young caretaker, after kindling a fire, lit several candles in sundry old corners giving an effect of what Mary called “ghastly gleaming.”
“I have an idea,” Byron said. “We must take advantage of this gloom, as Mary thinks it. We must hold a seance.”
“Here?” Polidori asked him.
“It is the best place in the world. Shelley has no doubt concluded that there are ghosts in the dungeon.”
“I do not exactly think that.”
“Where better to raise the spirits?”
“The Swiss are a practical people,” I said to him. “They do not harbour ghosts.”
“All lakes are haunted, Frankenstein. Large bodies of water attract lost souls.”
“They may not wish to be called,” Mary said.
“They will be in fighting form then. Ready for a tussle with the living. Do not be alarmed, Mary. I always have a firearm in my pocket. We will sit at this table in the corner. Bring over the chairs, Polidori.”
Byron then pulled the heavy velvet curtains over all the windows, so that the tremulous light of the candles became more intense. The storm was raging outside, as if all the elements were in contention.
“You are acting,” Bysshe said, “as if you were the stage-manager of chaos.”
“I know it. I was born for my own ruin. We need one more chair, Polidori.”
So we sat around the table, our hands spread in a circle with our fingers touching. The table was in a dark corner of the room, but it was favoured by the heat of the fire.
I felt ill at ease from the begi
Bysshe sat through the proceedings with the strangest expression of apprehension upon his face. Mary was looking at him, no doubt recalling his reaction to Polidori’s tale. But he did not relapse into the same state. He began to laugh, a quiet convulsive laughter that racked his entire frame. She went over to him and put her arm around him. “I am calm,” he said. “Nothing whatever the matter.”
Polidori opened the curtains. “I can see,” he said, “some faint patches of blue coming over the mountains. The storm is abating.”
“Great God, I hope not.” Byron rose to his feet. “I live in storms.”
I believe that it was at this moment that I decided I would leave my companions. I had warned them already that at some point I would make my way to the family estate at Chamonix. I wished to visit the graves of my father and my sister, unseen by me since the time of their deaths; but in truth I also craved solitude and silence. The endless chatter of this journey had wearied me. When I a
I retired to my room, where Fred had put out my sleeping clothes, and lay down to rest. I must have slept for an hour or so, when I was awoken by a tapping at my window.
21
THE CREATURE WAS STARING at me. With his usual agility and speed he must have climbed up to the balcony before my room, and was now waiting for me to unlock the casement. I hesitated, and he knocked quite violently upon the window. Fearing his discovery, I allowed him to enter. Now he stood before me, looking at me with what seemed to be an expression of infinite pity. “Why are you here?” I asked him.
“Where else am I to come, if I seek for a companion?”
I was overcome at once by a sense of misery and foreboding. “I had not expected to see you. Not after-”
“Marlow?” He put his hand up to his face, in a gesture of self-abasement. “I had rather be a piece of clay than what I am. Anything without sensation.”
“You feel sorrow then? And regret?”
“I do not know what I feel. I know only what I do not feel. Yes. Once I felt joy. In the first expression of my new life I felt wonder and gratitude. I was free. I looked upon the world with fresh perception of its glory. I was newborn, and in that state I felt the bliss of all creation. The hope and bliss have fled. This thing has crept into my heart, weighing me down to the dust.”
“Guilt for your crimes.”
“If you say so.”
“You have murdered two young women, for no other reason than that they were in my company.”
He turned from me, and walked back towards the window. “I wish that I had joined them.”
“Do you mean that you wish to die?”
“Look at me. Do you see me clearly? Why would I wish to live?”
“Let me understand you better.”
“I find no rest in the darkest night, or comfort in the brightest day. Is not death easy in comparison? Is it not to be desired?”
“You wish to break this pact we have? This pact of life?”
“So that I might be no more. So that I might abide in darkness and blackness and empty space.”
I bowed my head, thinking of what he might have been and what he really had become. And was there also some blame to be attached to me?
“Of all creatures, I should not be saved from death.”
“If you wish to end, then surely you could hurl yourself from the summit of a high mountain or envelop yourself in flame?”
“You know better than that. You have told me yourself. He who has died once can never die again. I have lain beneath the surface of the river, and my lungs have filled with water, yet I could not succumb. I have thrown myself from a cliff into the wild sea, but I have emerged unharmed. So I come back to you. The source. The origin of my woe.” He turned back to face me. “I know that you have repaired the electrical machines.”
“You once tried to destroy them.”
“Now they may be my deliverance.”
“How so?”
“I have been considering my plight. I do not know the precise means by which you restored me to life, but I have speculated. I have spent days and nights in meditation. I am aware of the galvanic force of the electrical fluid. That must have been your method, in some form or another. Surely you can alter the fluid accordingly and reverse the process of animation? Surely you can counteract the force?”