Страница 13 из 96
Except getting humankind to decide on their ma
What if we fail this time?
Would Ship really break the recording? He felt it in his guts: Ship would erase them. No more humankin.... ever. Ship would go on to new distractions.
If we fail, we'll mature without flowering, never to send our seed through Infinity. Human evolution will stop here.
Have I changed in hyb? All that tim....
He slipped out of the tank enclosure and padded across to a full-length mirror set into one of the lab's curved walls. His naked flesh appeared unchanged from the last time he had seen it. His face retained its air of quizzical detachment, an expression others often thought calculating. The remote brown eyes and upraked black eyebrows had been both help and hindrance. Something in the human psyche said such features belonged only to superior creatures. But superiority could be an impossible burden.
"Ahhh, you sense a truth," Ship whispered.
Flattery tried to swallow in a dry throat. The mirror told him that his flesh had not aged. Time? He began to grasp what Ship meant by such a length of Time which was meaningless. Hyb held flesh in stasis no matter what the passage of Time. No maturity there. But what about his mind? What about that reflected construct for which his brain was the receiver? He felt that something had ripened in his awareness.
"I'm ready. How do I get down to Pandora?"
Ship spoke from a vocoder above the mirror. "There are several ways, transports which I have provided."
"So You deliver me to Pandora. I just walk in on them. 'Hi. I'm Raja Flattery. I've come to give you a big pain in the head.'"
"Flippancy does not suit you, Raj."
"I feel Your displeasure."
"Do you already regret your decision, Raj?"
"Can You tell me anything more about the problems on Pandora?"
"The most immediate problem is their encounter with an alien intelligence, the 'lectrokelp."
"Dangerous?"
"So they believe. The 'lectrokelp is close to infinite and humans fea...."
"Humans fear open spaces, never-ending open spaces. Humans fear their own intelligence because it's close to infinite."
"You delight Me, Raj!"
A feeling of joy washed over Flattery. It was so rich and powerful that he felt he might dissolve in it. He knew that the sensation did not originate with him, and it left him feeling drained, transparen.... bloodless.
Flattery pressed the heels of his hands against his tightly closed eyes. What a terrible thing that joy was! Because when it was gon.... when it was gon....
He whispered: "Unless You intend to kill me, don't do that again."
"As you choose." How cold and remote.
"I want to be human! That's what I was intended to be!"
"If that's the game you seek."
Flattery sensed Ship's disappointment, but this made him defensive and he turned to questions.
"Have Shipmen communicated with this alien intelligence, this 'lectrokelp?"
"No. They have studied it, but do not understand it."
Flattery took his hands away from his eyes. "Have Shipmen ever heard of Raja Flattery?"
"That's a name in the history which I teach them."
"Then I'd better take another name." He ruminated for a moment, then: "I'll call myself Raja Thomas."
"Excellent. Thomas for your doubts and Raja for your origins."
"Raja Thomas, communications expert - Ship's best friend. Here I come, ready or not."
"A game, yes. A game. An.... Raj?"
"What?"
"For an infinite being, Time produces boredom. Limits exist to how much Time I can tolerate."
"How much Time are You giving us to decide the way we'll WorShip?"
"At the proper moment you will be told. And one more thing -"
"Yes?"
"Do not be dismayed if I refer to you occasionally as My Devil."
He was a moment recovering his voice, then: "What can I do about it? You can call me whatever You like."
"I merely asked that you not be dismayed."
"Sure! And I'm King Canute telling the tides to stop!"
There was no response from Ship and Flattery wondered if he was to be left on his own to find his way down to this planet called Pandora. But presently, Ship spoke once more: "Now we will dress you in appropriate costume, Raj. There is a new Chaplain/Psychiatrist who rules the Shipmen. They call him Ceepee and, when he offends them, they call him The Boss. You can expect that The Boss will order you to attend him soon."
***
Perhaps the immobility of the things that surround us is forced upon them by our conviction that they are themselves and not anything else, and by the immobility of our conceptions of them.
OAKES STUDIED his own image reflected in the com-console at his elbow. The curved screen, he knew, was what made the reflection diminutive.
Reduced.
He felt jumpy. No telling what the ship might do to him next.
Oakes swallowed in a dry throat.
He did not know how long he had sat there hypnotized by that reflection. It was still nightside. An unfinished glass of Pandoran wine sat on a low brown table in front of him. He glanced up and around. His opulent cubby remained a place of shadows and low illumination, but something had changed. He could feel the change. Somethin.... someone watchin....
The ship might refuse to talk to him, deny him elixir, but he was getting messages - many messages.
Change.
That unspoken question which hovered in his mind had changed something in the air. His skin tingled and there was a throbbing at his temples.
What if the ship's program is ru
His reflection in the blank screen gave no answer. It showed only his own features and he began to feel pride in what he saw there. Not just fat, no. Here was a mature man in his middle years. The Boss. The silver at his temples spoke of dignity and importance. And although he wa.... plump, his skin remained soft and clear, testimony to the care he took preserving the appearance of youth.
Women liked that.
What if the ship is Shi.... is truly God?
The air felt dirty in his lungs and he realized he was breathing much too rapidly.
Doubts.
The damned ship was not going to respond to his doubts. Never had. Wouldn't talk to him; wouldn't feed him. He had to feed himself from the ship's limited hydroponics gardens. How long could he continue to trust them? Not enough food for everyone. The very thought increased his appetite.
He stared at the unfinished glass of wine - dark amber, oily on the i
I'm the Ceepee.
The Ceepee was supposed to believe in Ship. In his own cynical way, old Kingston had insisted on this.
I don't believe.
Was that why a new Ceepee was being sent groundside?
Oakes ground his teeth together.
I'll kill the bastard!
He spoke it aloud, intensely aware of how the words echoed in his cubby.
"Hear that, Ship? I'll kill the bastard!"
Oakes half expected a response to this blasphemy. He knew this because he caught himself holding his breath, listening hard to the shadows at the edges of his cubby.
How did you test for godhood?
How do you separate a powerful mechanical phenomenology, a trick of technological mirrors, fro.... . from a miracle?
If God did not play dice, as the Ceepees were always told, what might God play? Perhaps dice was not challenge enough for a god. What was risk enough to tempt a god out of silence or reveri.... out of a god's lair?
It was a stupefying question - to challenge God at God's own game?
Oakes nodded to himself.
In the game, perhaps, is the miracle. Miracle of Consciousness? It was no trick to make a machine self-programming, self-perpetuating. Complex, true, and unimaginably costl....