Cold Truth

It had thrilled him every time he’d said her name aloud. He’d used it as frequently as possible.

He’d counted the days, Saturday to Saturday, lived for his hours working out there in the marsh, swatting mosquitoes and green-headed flies. He didn’t care. He was with her, hour after hour, every Saturday. And with every hour spent with her, his love grew until it was the most important thing in his life. Grew until he thought he’d die of it.

She wanted blinds built, he built blinds. Not one or two or three, but an entire series of them, strategically placed throughout the acres that made up the sanctuary. She’d hooked him up with a contractor who’d offered to help build the structures, and he gladly gave up his weekends to labor on something that pleased her so much.

“You’re amazing,” she’d said once, after having climbed the ladder to one of the blinds. “I can’t believe you did this. How many have you built now? Four? Five? Simply amazing. I can’t thank you enough.”

Sure you can, he remembered thinking at the time. I know how you can thank me. We both know how. And we both know you want to.

Love and lust had mixed inside him, a heady brew. She must have felt it, too. No one could feel that way about someone who didn’t feel the same about him. Of that he was certain. The feeling was way too big. It dominated everything in his life. She had to know. She had to feel exactly the same about him. It wouldn’t have been fair otherwise.

And wasn’t it meant to be? After all, the offense his father had wanted to punish him for, well, that hadn’t been much of anything, right? No one was hurt, right? No harm, no foul.

It wasn’t as if he’d actually touched that girl.

He stood beneath the blind and jumped up to grab the under-support beams, then hoisted himself up to the floored area. Leaning over the railing, he gazed out at the deepening shadows. It had been so many years since he’d stood in this spot, this very spot, where he’d listened to her talk about the bird counts they were doing down in Cape May.

“Thousands upon thousands of songbirds and seabirds, can you imagine what that looks like, thousands of birds feeding on the shore?” She’d shaken her head, and that black ponytail had swung seductively. “I’m thinking about taking a van of kids down next year. If you’re home from school, maybe you’d like to go.”

He’d nodded. Sure. Sure, I’ll go… I’ll go anywhere with you.

But of course, he hadn’t. Oh, he’d come home from school in May, but there was no trip to Cape May for Je

“You brought it on yourself, Je

He said the words aloud, certain she heard him.

His thoughts turned to Cass. She had ruined things for him once again. First with Je

He sighed deeply. She was going to have to be punished. Maybe if he wiped her out, it would be all right, like wiping a slate clean.

He found the image of wiping the slate clean with Je

Maybe then he could find the one he’d been searching for and they could be together for always. She wouldn’t try to run from him, and he wouldn’t have to hurt her.

Well, he was just going to have to take care of it, once and for all.

He reached up to a low-hanging tree branch and snapped it off.

Snap. Just like that.

22

“A

Halfway to her car, A

“When do you get to see that fiancé of yours?” He was smiling as he walked toward her.

She smiled back. “We manage. He’s a detective. We both know the routine.”

“Think you can build a life around schedules like the ones you two have?”

“We’re going to do our best.”

“When’s the wedding?”

“We haven’t set a date yet. I’m thinking maybe around the holidays. Neither of us wants to put it off too much longer.” She juggled her car keys, and they clanged softly against each other as she tossed the key ring from one hand to the other and back again.

“Sure hope I’m on the guest list.” He gri

She laughed. “You catch the bouquet, you gotta back it up, Cisco. Is there something I don’t know about? Last I heard, you hadn’t had a real date since Livy Bach slammed the door in your face one night after…”

“Ouch.” He winced at the reference to a relationship with a fellow agent, one that never got off the ground. “That’s cold, McCall. Really cold.”

“Your luck,” she said as she unlocked her car door. “Livy’s not your type.”

He frowned. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Livy is the quintessential party girl. You need a rock, my friend. Livy’s a doll and more fun than just about anyone I know, but she has heartbreak written all over her. Not only for you, for anyone who tries to get too close. There are walls there I’m afraid no one can climb.”

“Well, thanks for the analysis, Dr. McCall.”

“I call ’ em as I see ’em.” She slid behind the wheel of her car. “I love Livy dearly, but she has a lot of problems, Rick. A lot of baggage. She’s not what you need.”

“I am not going to bite, I swear I’m not.” He slammed her door for her, then stood back while she rolled the window down. “I’m not going to ask what you think is my type or what you think I need. The last thing I want right now is to have you-”

“Hey, Cass.” A

“A little tired, but I’m fine. Thank you.” Cass stopped next to Rick and leaned in the window slightly. “I don’t think I thanked you for… well, for working with me. It sounds silly to say thanks for hypnotizing me, but I’m so grateful to you for doing that.”

“You must feel a lot of conflict, though.” A

“In what way?” Cass stood up and took a step back from the car.

“All these years, you’ve thought you had closure, for your parents’ death and that of your sister. For the attack on you. Now that door is wide open again. It has to make you uneasy, at the very least.”

Cass nodded. “A little. I never thought about that aspect of it, you know? Wayne Fulmer was in prison, he’d never get out. Justice had been served. Though, truthfully, when you’re a child and you’ve lost everyone and everything, justice is merely a concept, one that has very little meaning.”

“I understand.” A

“Thank you. I might call you, if you’re sure…”

“I’m positive.” A

She glanced up at Rick as she put the car in reverse. “I’ll see you soon. We’ll call you later tonight if we feel we have something that might shed some light on your case.”

Rick nodded and slapped lightly at the fender as A

“She’s really nice,” Cass said as she waved good-bye.

He nodded. “A