Self-Defence

"Sit down!"

Lucy stared.

"Sit down!"

Lucy smiled. And waved. " 'Bye, Daddy. It's been educational."

She threw the door open.

Green filled the doorway and sunlight shocked the room.

Lowell squinted as Lucy looked out at the green tide; then he sprang forward, groping for a hold on nothingness. His lower body was leaden, and it anchored him to the bed.

He cursed Lucy, God, the Devil.

"Nice property you've got, Daddy. There's someone I need to look for out there."

A terrible comprehension took hold of Lowell, a preliminary death. He pitched harder, fell forward, flopping face down on the mattress.

Lying there, face pressed against the sheets, he labored to breathe as he watched Lucy disappear.

His eyes met mine.

His were bottomless and terrified.

I glanced at the black phone and considered ripping it out of the wall. But there had to be other extensions in the house- why remind him of the instrument?

As I left, I heard him howling, like a child, for Nova.

43

At first I thought Lucy had slipped into the forest. Then I heard footsteps along the side of the house.

Returning to her car. Good.

When I caught up with her, she didn't acknowledge me. How many sessions would it take to unravel what she'd just been through?

We reached the Colt. But instead of opening the driver's door, she went to the back and opened the trunk.

Personal justice.

Finally pushed too far?

I ran over just as she pulled a shovel out of the trunk and put it over her shoulder.

Brand new, the price tag still looped to the handle. Bearing it like a rifle, she headed back toward the house.

I blocked her.

She passed around me. I blocked her again.

"Come on, Lucy."

She walked away. Once more, I caught up.

I felt like screaming, This is nuts!

What I said was, "Don't let him get to you, Lucy."

"Nothing. Maybe so, we'll see."

We were hurrying alongside the house now.

"He'll call his friends. They'll come after you."

She ignored me. I took hold of her arm. She shook me off.

"Listen to me, Lucy-"

"He won't do anything. He doesn't do anything, he just talks- that's his game, talk, talk, talk."

"He's still dangerous."

"He's nothing." Furious smile. "Nothing."

We came to the dirt patch behind the building. Women's lingerie flapping on the line. The back door was closed. Nova had heeded Lowell's cries.

Nodding as if in response to a suggestion, Lucy forged forward, into the green.

Low shrubs and tender shoots, shadowed by the tree canopy, gave way quickly to dense ferns, creeping vines, brambles, and broad-leafed things that looked to be some kind of giant lily.

Lucy used her hands to clear the way, and when that didn't work she began hacking with the shovel. The tool proved a poor machete, and soon she was breathing hard and grunting with anger.

"Why don't you give me that?"

"This isn't your problem," she said, chopping. "If you really think there's danger, don't put yourself in it."

"I don't want you in it either."

"I understand what I'm getting into."

She touched my hand briefly, then resumed poking through the brush.

My choices were: Drive back to PCH and try to reach Milo, carry her out bodily, or stick with her and try to get her out as quickly as possible.

Physical coercion would probably destroy our therapeutic relationship, but I could stand that if it meant saving her life. But if she resisted it might prove difficult, even ugly.

Maybe the best thing was to stay with her. Even if she found the gravesite, she'd learn soon that exhumation with one shovel was beyond her physical capabilities. And the thought of her out here, alone, scared the hell out of me.

Maybe I was overestimating the danger. Lowell was a monster, but in his own sick way he'd been reaching out to her. Would he sentence her to death?

She'd gone only a few yards but the vegetation had closed over her like a trapdoor and I could barely make out her plaid shirt. I looked over my shoulder. The house was obscured, too. No visible pathway, but as I followed Lucy's footsteps, a troughlike depression in the earth became evident.

Long-buried trail.

She was moving as surely and quickly as the brush would allow.

Knowing where she was going.

Guided by a dream.

I clawed my way through the vegetation and got right behind her. The plants were taller, the treetops thicker, and soon there was more green than blue in the sky. Things slithered and scampered all around us, but other than a suddenly vibrating leaf or tendril, I saw nothing move. From time to time, I heard the broom-sweep of wings flapping in panic, but the birds stayed out of sight, too.

The growth became jungle-thick. Lucy swung the shovel like an ax, sweat ru

We came to the first of the small cabins, a fallen-down roofless thing, nearly hidden by emerald clouds. Lucy barely looked at it. Tears were diluting the sweat tracks, and her blouse was sodden. I wanted to say something comforting but she'd just been raped by words.

A second cabin appeared a few minutes later, just a loose pile of logs managing to support a tar roof. Shiny, black, wasplike things buzzed through holes in the tarpaper, swooping in, then jetting out like tiny dive bombers.

Lucy stopped, stared, shook her head.

We kept going.

Our silent trudge took us past three more cabins.

Gnats and chiggers were having fun with our faces. The sudden takeoff of a huge brown bird nearly stopped my heart. I managed to catch a glimpse of the creature as it forged up through the treetops. Big square head and five-foot wingspread. Horned owl. The silence that followed was unsettling.

Lucy didn't seem to notice. Pinpoints of blood pocked her face where the bugs had gotten her, and her palms were raw from wrestling with vines.

"Give your hands a rest."

She said, "No," but she complied.

Getting through wasn't easy even with my pushup-tightened arms. Hers had to be numb. I ripped and sliced, wondering how much grace time we had. Knowing we were leaving an obvious trail for anyone who followed.

"Even if you find her," I said, huffing, "after all this time, she won't look like a person. There may be nothing left at all. Animals carry off bones."

"I know. I learned that at the trial."

The trough deepened and I had to fight for balance. Lucy was looking up at the trees.

Something lacy? Trees of all kinds were everywhere, an untidy colo

It was two-forty. The sun had peaked and was falling behind us, dancing through holes in the overgrowth, a tiny, brilliant mirror.

A new sound: more of the groundwater, a trickle that recalled the one I'd heard driving up.

The kind of moisture that hastens decomposition.

"Even if you find her, what will you do?"

"Take something back with me. They can do tests and prove it's her. That'll be evidence. Something."

I heard something snap behind me and stopped. Lucy had heard it, too, and she peered at the forest behind us.

Silence.

She shrugged and wiped her face with her sleeve. It was hard to gauge how far we were from the lodge house. I tasted my own sweat and felt it sting my eyes.

We started walking again, coming upon a knotted mass of thick, ivylike vines with coils as hard as glass. It refused to yield to the shovel. Lucy threw herself at it, yanking and tearing, her hands wet with blood. I pulled her away and inspected the plant. Despite its monstrous head, its root base was relatively small, petrified, a two-foot clump of burl.