Dead Wrong

Joa

Ernie took a long sip of beer. “No,” he said, lowering the bottle. “It’s me.”

“What about you?”

“It’s not something that’s easy to talk about,” he answered. “I mean, you being a woman and all…”

“Ernie,” she urged. “Tell me.”

He took another sip of beer. “You may have noticed I’ve missed some shifts lately.”

“Yes,” she said. “Frank and I had noticed.”

“Well,” Ernie said, “it’s because I’ve been seeing a doctor- up in Tucson. Rosie told me I needed to tell you about it, so you’d know what’s been going on.”

“What is going on?”

He sighed. “When I went in for my a

“PSA?” Joa

“Prostate-specific antigen,” Ernie explained. “It means I’ve got prostate cancer.”

For a moment, Joa

He nodded. “Me, too. Believe me. I got the news a couple of weeks ago. For a while I just couldn’t process it. Couldn’t think how it was possible for me to have cancer. I’ve always been healthy as a horse. And then, just like that, you’re sitting there in the doctor’s office, he says the magic words and wham-o, all of a sudden you’re a cancer patient. It’s like falling off a cliff.”

Joa

“What’s the prognosis?” she asked.

Ernie shrugged. “You know how doctors are. They think they caught it early and all that happy baloney^ but who knows? Since nobody ever had me do a PSA test before, they’re not really sure how long it’s been around.”

“What about treatment?” she asked.

“That’s the thing. We’ve been trying to find out what all the options are. Surgery, radiation, whatever. Rosie and I have been meeting with people-doctors and patients both-trying to figure out what’s the best thing to do. Supposedly I’m a good candidate for seeds…”

“Seeds?”

“Radiation seeds. Then there’s some hotshot new treatment called cryo-something, where they freeze things, but my oncologist says that’s still out there in the experimental stages. He thinks if the tumor has spread at all, the radioactive seeding is probably the best course of treatment. So that’s the way we’re going to go-with the seeds. I’ll probably end up being some glow-in-the-dark freak. Maybe my dick will end up qualifying as an alternate light source.”

Dark humor at crime scenes was part of how homicide cops coped. Joa

“How long does the seed treatment take?” she asked.

“They say it’s not that big a deal. Supposedly it’s a minor procedure. If there aren’t any complications, I’ll most likely be back at work after just a couple of days. My recovery would be a lot longer if we opted for the surgery.”

“Whatever course of treatment you choose,” Joa

“Thanks, boss,” he said.

“And thank you for telling me,” Joa

Ernie shook his head. “Haven’t,” he said. “Not even Jaime, and I should have. And I need to tell Frank-or you can- because he should know. But beyond that I’d like to keep a low profile because I don’t want to make a big thing of it. People are fu

“Don’t worry, Ernie,” she said. “We’ll manage. The important thing is for you to do whatever you need to do in order to get better. How’s Rose?”

Ernie Carpenter used the back of one meaty paw to swipe at something in the corner of his eye. “She’s a brick,” he said, his voice breaking. “I mean, she’s always been there for me, but now-” He broke off, shaking his head, and took another sip of the beer.

“Anyway,” he continued after a short pause, “all this sort of got my attention. Made me realize that I’m not go

“Some,” Joa

Expecting him to tick off a couple of the male deputies, Joa

“She’d have to pass the exam,” Joa

“That won’t be a problem,” Ernie said. “She’s been studying. I’ve actually been giving her some coaching on the side.”

Joa

The smallest hint of a smile tweaked the turned-down corners of Ernie Carpenter’s mouth. “Well,” he said, “after all, you turned out all right, didn’t you?”

“You think she can pass?”

“Absolutely. And not just barely, either. She’ll ace the damned thing.”

“When are you pla

“As soon as they can get me scheduled, probably sometime late next week.”

“And you’re thinking we should bring Debbie in on a provisional basis to help out with what we have going right now?”

Ernie nodded.

“Anyone else you think we should look at?” Joa

“My next choice would have been Dave Hollicker, but you already tapped him for crime scene investigation, so he’s on the team anyway. Beyond Debbie, though, with so many of the experienced deputies off in the reserves, pickings around the department are a little thin.”

Joa

“I’ll take it under advisement,” Joa

“Right,” Ernie said. “I won’t breathe a word.”

He stood up. “I’d better be going,” he said. “It’s getting late. I’ve taken up enough of your time.”

At the door, Joa