Sweet Dreams, Irene

He turned to me and scowled, but didn’t say anything. I decided the best defense was a good offense, mainly because I was pissed. But I kept my voice calm and low.

“You know, John, I really don’t mind being paraded through the newsroom like an errant child – you’ve got a nasty reputation to protect, and as staff curmudgeon it’s almost your duty to throw a fit now and then. I’m happy to be of help. But usually, underneath it all, you’ve got some reason for getting angry. I can’t figure out what it is this time. Have I let you down somehow? Is there a problem with the way I’ve covered the election?”

He sat down. The flush of anger left his face and he started fooling around with a ballpoint pen, stabbing it into the blotter on his desk. He was actually silent. Something was wrong.

“What’s going on, John?”

“I don’t have any problems with your coverage of the election. As usual, you’ve done an ace job. You haven’t let me down in any way.”

“So what is it?”

“Wrigley is on my case all the time. He wants me to hand over some of your work to Stacee.”

I felt my fists clench. Winston Wrigley III was an ass-pinching SOB who had inherited a job as editor. The publications board could still outvote him, or the staff would have walked out a long time ago. In fact, two years before, I had quit the Express after a loud argument with him. He had wanted me to come back but I turned him down until O’Co

“My work to Stacee? Stacee who couldn’t find her way around City Hall with a map? Stacee who’s so adorable she spells her name in a cutesy kind of way? Stacee who has spent all of six months out of J school?”

“You’ve forgotten five months of grad school under Professor Wrigley’s private tutelage.”

“Goddamn that bastard! He questions my ethics – bans me from crime stories because of Frank-”

“Wait a minute, you know he’s entitled to do that under the circumstances.”

“Oh hell, John. I’ve heard it all before – if I’m going to bed with a cop, you’re not going to put me on a crime story. I might not be able to stay objective if the cops are due for some criticism. Never mind that you and half the reporters on this paper are drinking buddies with these same cops – sex somehow will ruin my brain for being a crime reporter. But you know what, John? It’s worse for Frank. Who do you suppose they’re going to go looking for the first time somebody in the department leaks some story to the paper?”

“Look, Irene, if you think I don’t trust you-”

“I hope it hasn’t come to that.”

“It hasn’t.”

I settled down a little. “I’ve never made a stink out of being forbidden to do stories that involve the cops. I can live with it. I knew that something like that might happen if Frank and I got involved-”

“Yeah, yeah, but you can’t help yourselves. Look, don’t make me sick, okay? I don’t like what Wrigley’s trying to pull with Stacee any more than you do. She’s not a bad kid, she just seems to be so used to getting her way by using that saucy little body that it hasn’t occurred to her yet to use her brains.”

“Yeah, well, anyone who lets Wrigley into her underpants can’t be the next Einstein.”

“Oh, so you’ve been wise all your life? Shall I talk about a couple of the losers I’ve seen you hook up with over the years?”

I flinched. “No thanks. Point taken. So what are you getting at, John?”

“Starting tomorrow, why don’t you try to let her help you out?”

“You have got to be kidding.”

“I’m not. You know it’s too much to cover on your own. You’ve been ru

There was some truth in this, I thought. In the past, O’Co

“So you think Stacee has talent – outside of the type Wrigley appreciates so much?”

John gri

“Hold on, John. This is not an unconditional surrender. I’m not signing up to be a mentor. I’ve worked hard to build up the trust and confidence of my sources in Las Piernas, and I’m not just going to hand it all to her on a silver platter. If she works with me, I choose what I’m going to let her cover. The paper has as much or more to lose than I do if she starts pissing people off.”

“You are getting very uppity in your old age.”

“I have a great role model.”

“Hmmph.”

He didn’t say anything for a while, but finally he agreed.

As I left his office, my eyes came to rest on a woman who looked like she was made to order should central casting call up and say, “We need a bimbo.” It was Stacee Martin. She looked up at me and smiled a 400-watt, totally phony smile.

What the hell had I gotten myself into now?

MEANING TO RETURN the smile, I believe I ended up grimacing, since she looked puzzled in response. I turned and made my way over to my desk, which had once been O’Co

Now, at the time when maybe I would have picked somebody out on my own, I was going to be stuck with double-e Stacee. Hell if I was going to take responsibility for thrusting her career forward.

But as I thought about it, a little smile began to form on my lips. There were lots of ways to pay dues. I was going to run her ass so ragged she wouldn’t have enough time or energy to warm Wrigley’s bed. God, what a great way to pay Wrigley back.

THAT DECIDED, I called the Montgomery campaign to see what I could learn. I asked for Brady Scott, Montgomery’s press manager.

“Irene! What a pleasant surprise!” An unsolicited call from the local press. He was gushing all over himself.

“How’s it going, Brady?”

“Very well, very well. Monty will make a great D.A.”

“Any special reason for all of this optimism?”

“Oh, just faith in the voters,” he said, and I could hear the note of caution creeping into his voice.

“Come on, Brady. Word on the street is that you’ve got a nasty hit pla

“Monty is ru

“Who’s saying he isn’t?”

“Look, you know how it is. As any campaign gets down to the wire, people pull out the stops. It’s already happening and you know it – our opposition is doing the same thing. We found out something we think the voters ought to know about, and we’re going to tell them.”

“If the voters ought to know about it, tell me. It’s practically your civic duty, Brady.”

“Well…”

As he hesitated, I heard the muffled voice of someone else in the room with him. I couldn’t make out who it was.

“Look, that just wouldn’t fit into our plans right now. I promise you that I will be available for you if you’ve got any other questions. Are you coming to the coalition meeting tonight?”