The Diceman

Dr. E squinted at her briefly and then replied `How long you felt this way?'

'Please,' Marie begged. `I need your love. I want you to love me, to need me. Please.'

A tear glistened at the corner of one.

'Who do I remind you of?' Dr. E asked.'

'Of only yourself. I have needed your love all my life.'

`But I'm a psychiatrist.'

'Please don't be a psychiatrist anymore. For one minute, no, for ten seconds, for only ten seconds, I beg of you, give

me love. I need so much, to feel your strong arms around me, to feel your love ..'

Marie was close to Dr. E, her beautifully formed bosom heaving with her passionate need to be loved, tears now

wetting both her cheeks . .. .

`Ten seconds?' Dr. Ecstein asked.

`Seven seconds. Five. Three seconds, just three seconds please oh please give me your love.'

Dr. Ecstein stood squat and tense and his facial muscles moiled and twitched. His face began to get red. Then,

gradually, the moiling stopped and, white-faced, he said:- 'Can't do it, Honesty, Trust. Don't know what love is.'

'Love me, please love me, please I'm-'

'The teacher pulled Marie away, and informed: her that there was a request for her presence in one of the love rooms

and she skipped off, leaving Dr.. E still unloving.

Since self-pity is the hardest emotion of all for emotionless people to feel, the teacher made no further efforts with the

basic emotions and took Dr: E to the marriage playroom.

`You, have been unfaithful to your-wife-' the teacher said.

`What for?' he asked.

`I was only suggesting options. Let us say then you have been faithful to her, but-'

The teacher was interrupted by a short, slightly-fat, middle-aged woman coming in and marching up to Dr. Ecstein

and screaming is his face 'You viper! You swine! You beast! You betrayed me!'

'- wait a minute,' Dr. E stammered. '

`You and that trollop! How could you?'

She hit Dr. E a vicious blow on the side of the faces, almost breaking his glasses.

`Are you sure?' he said, backing away. `Why are you so upset?'

'Upset? The wholetown talking about you and that cesspool behind my back.'

`But how can anyone know what never-'

`If I know about it, the whole world knows about it.' She hit Dr. E again less strenuously and collapsed on the couch in

tears.

`It's nothing to cry about,' Dr. E said, coming over to comfort her. `Infidelity is a minor matter, really nothing -'

`Ahhhhhggg!!!!' she erupted from the couch, plowed her head into Dr. E's stomach and sent him crashing over an easy

chair onto a telephone table and wastebasket.

'I'm sorry !' Dr. E. screamed. The woman on top of him was scratching at his face and he rolled desperately away.'

'You bastard!' the woman shouted. `Cold-hearted killer. You've never loved me.'

'Of course not,' Dr. E said, scrambling to his feet. `So -what's all the fuss about?' 'Ahhhhgggg!!' she screamed - and came at-

Later the teacher tried to suggest other possible option to Dr. E. `Your wife has been unfaithful, your best friend

betrayed you, your-'

'So what else is new?' Dr. Ecstein asked.

`Well, let's say your money has all been lost in foolish investment.'

`Never.'

`Never what?'

`I'd never lose all my money in any way.'

`Try to use your imagination, Jim. The-'

`The name is Jake Ecstein. Why use my imagination? If I'm in touch with reality, why leave it?'

`How, do you know it's reality?'

'How do you know it's not?' Dr. E asked.

`But if there's any doubt, then you should experiment with other realities.'

`No doubt in my mind.'

`I see.'

`Look, buddy, I'm here as an observer. I like Luke Rhinehart and want to look over his plant.'

'You can't understand CETRE without living it'

`Okay, I'm trying, but don't expect me to use my imagination.'

Later Dr. Ecstein was taken to the love rooms.

`What kind of love experiences would you like to have?'

`Huh? ?'

`What kind of sex experience would you like to have?'

`Oh,' Dr. Ecstein said. `Okay.'

`Okay, what?'

'Okay, I'll have a sex experience.'

`But what kinds interest you?'

`Any. Doesn't make any difference.'

The teacher handed Dr. E the basic list of thirty-six possible love roles.

`Are there any that particularly appeal to you or any that you would prefer not to have as possible options of the Die?'

he asked.

Dr. E looked over the list: 'You wish to be loved slavishly by a . `You-wish to love slavishly a ' `You wish to be courted sweetly by a . . : 'You wish to court sweetly…' `'You wish to be raped by a . . : 'You wish to rape a : . : 'You wish to watch pornographic films,' 'You wish to watch

other people's sexual activities,' 'You wish to striptease,' `To watch a striptease,' 'You wish to be someone's mistress, a

prostitute, a stud, a call girl, a male prostitute, happily married to Most of the options gave the choice of alternatives

for performing the sexual role with: a young woman, an older woman, a young man, an older man, a man and a

woman, two men or two women.

`What's all this?' Dr. Ecstein asked.

`Simply choose those you are willing to play, make a list and let the dice choose one for you to play.'

`Better scratch the "rape" and the "be raped." Had enough of those in the marriage room.'

`All right. Any others, Phil?'

`Stop calling me names.'

`Sorry, Roger.'

`Better throw out the homosexual stuff. Might hurt my reputation outside.'

`But no one in here knows who you are or ever will know.'

`I'm Jake Ecstein, damn it! I've said that six times.'

`I know that, Elijah, but there are five other Jake Ecsteins in here this week as well, so I don't see what difference it

makes.

'Five others!' `Certainly. Would you like to meet some before you try your first random sex experience?'

`You're Goddam-right.'

The teacher took Dr. E into a room named Cocktail Party where a crowd milled and drinks were served. The teacher

took a portly gentleman by the elbow and said to him `Jake, I'd like you to meet Roger. Roger, Jake Ecstein.'

'Goddam it,' Dr. Ecstein said, `I'm Jake Ecstein!'

`Oh are you really?' the portly gentleman said. `I am too. How nice. I'm very pleased to meet you, Jake.'

Dr. E permitted himself to shake hands.

`Have you met the tall thin Jake Ecstein yet?' the portly one asked. `Awfully pleasant chap.'

`No, I haven't. And I don't want to.'

`Well, he is a bit dull, but not a young-man-with-the-muscles Jake. Him you must meet, Jake.'

`Yeah, maybe. But I'm the real Jake Ecstein.'

`How extraordinary. I am too.'

`I mean in the outside world.'

`But that's what I mean too. And so does the tall thin Jake and the young muscled Jake and the lovely young girl Jakie

Ecstein. All of them.'

'But I'm really the real Jake Ecstein.'

`How extraordinary! I too am really…'

Jake passed up a love experience and got rid of his teacher and decided he needed to have a good di

the center's Game Rules and knew as he ate in the cafeteria that the waiters might not be real waiters, that the guy

slinging hash behind the counter might be a bank president, that the cashier might be a famous actress, that the woman

sitting opposite him might be a writer of children's stories although she was apparently pretending, despite weighing

close to two hundred founds, to be Marlene Dietrich.

`You bore me, dahling,' she was saying, her chubby mouth manhandling a cigarette.

`You're not exactly dynamite yourself, baby,' he replied eating rapidly.

`Where are all the men in this place,' she drawled. `I seem to meet only fruits.'