Panic Attack

Sure enough, about a minute went by, and then Joh

“Did anybody ever tell you you look just like Joh

He smiled widely, letting her see his perfect white teeth, and looked right in her eyes like he was totally enamored with her. He knew humble was the way to go and said, acting totally blown away and flattered, “You really think so?”

“Yeah,” she said. “Haven’t you heard that before?”

“Never,” he said. “Wow, you really made my day.”

He maintained eye contact, letting her notice his light blue eyes, which women often complimented. In fact, just last night the woman he’d picked up in Brooklyn told him that he had the most beautiful blue eyes she’d ever seen. He wound up screwing her, but he’d gotten away with only about a hundred bucks and no jewelry. Hopefully this woman would be a bigger score.

“By the way, I’m Gregory,” Joh

Joh

He didn’t say a word about himself until she asked him; then he did his best to tell her what she wanted to hear. Since she’d mentioned she lived in Queens, he told her that he was born in Queens and still had a lot of family there. He was actually from Brooklyn and was an orphan, but he wanted to have a co

His other brilliant move- which practically sealed the deal- was playing the Catholic card. He noticed she was wearing a crucifix, so he casually mentioned that he had gone to church last Sunday. Her eyes brightened and she said, “Wow, I go to church all the time.” He gave her some crap about how important spirituality was in his life and how sad it was that “the country was getting away from all that.” Then a few minutes later she actually said, “God, it’s so great to meet a guy who goes to church,” as if she seriously believed she’d met her Catholic Prince Charming on a rainy night in an Irish bar around the corner from Pe

Joh

Then her friend, the blonde, came over and said she had to get home. This was the last hurdle, and it was a major one. If Theresa had driven her friend to the bar (unlikely, since she’d mentioned she’d gone out tonight right after work) or her friend was staying at Theresa’s place (also unlikely, because she would’ve brought this up already) then Joh

“Gregory, I’d like you to meet my friend Do

“Oh, thank you so much,” she said, blushing the way Theresa had. “Actually,

I got it at Daffy’s.”

“Really? Wow, I love it.”

That was perfect- complimenting the friend, getting her to like him, too. Predictably Do

“Hey, if you’d like to stay I’ll make sure you get home safely.” Maybe anyone else delivering this line would’ve come off as a sleazeball, a player, but not

Joh

“Wow, that’s so nice of you,” Theresa said.