An Unofficial rose

'Why did you love me, I wonder? I was never, particularly faun-like!

'Heaven knows. Perhaps I only really woke up to myself later. Perhaps Felix woke me. Yet I did love you; yes, you were the great thing. Wasn't I unlucky?

'Emma, said Hugh, 'let me look after you properly. I wouldn't bother you. You could have your Jocelyn. But please let me somehow take you over. I know I don't deserve it, but I do love you. Only I must have some sort of status and security. I can't go on like in these last weeks. Just say in principle yes and we'll find a way to be together. He leaned forward, touching her skirt.

'Ah, my dear, she said, 'wouldn't we be ridiculous, two old people shouting endearments at each other?

'Emma, let us be together, let us have some reality together at last.

'It is too late for reality, she said. 'It is better that you should dream about me. Why spoil your dream? Keep it intact till the end. I'm terribly ill-natured really and not to be lived with or even near. I gave poor Lindsay a bad time, words and blows. Yes, I used to beat her. Now she's beating Randall! Could I have some more tea, if it's not too cold?

'I don't understand. Do you — want me to remain as I am — in love? He still clawed her dress.

'Yes, if you can. I'd adore it! If we must ape something in the past let it not be the marriage you were too cowardly and I not clever enough to get. Let it be some i

'You cheat me, he said in a voice of anguish, 'you deny me.

'Hugh, stop believing in magic. You are just like poor Randall after all, who thinks he can conjure up pleasure domes and caves of ice just by boarding a plane and sending off a few letters.

'But — how will you manage?

'I shall manage. I shall be happy. I shall be beating Jocelyn.

'But at least, he said, 'you will talk to me more. We shall have real speech, you will tell me about yourself?

Emma' laughed. 'I doubt if such tales would be suitable for young Jocelyn's ears.

'You mean, he took it in, 'that you won't see, me alone?

'Well, young Jocelyn will be here, won't she? said Emma. 'I shall keep her a prisoner as did Lindsay. Only more so! She gently extricated the fabric of her dress and drew it down about her knees.

Hugh leaned forward and took her chin in one hand and turned her face towards him. With his other hand he grasped her shoulder. The gesture had an effect of violence.

She let him hold her so for a minute, and then shrugged him off.

'You see how much I need a chaperone!

'So I'm to take Randall's place?

'How prettily you put it. You're to take Randall's place.

He let out a long sigh and stood up. 'I wonder if I shall be able to stand it.

', If you can stand it, come. And if not, not.

'But you look so sad —’

'Ah, I'm not sad for now, my sweet, I'm sad for then.

Chapter Thirty-five

THE wind took one of the dust-bin lids and rolled it clattering across the yard. A

Miranda was away staying with a school friend. She seemed to have escaped the measles. Pe

The Swa

A

Looking back on her last interview with Felix, A

That much, before he came, had seemed, if not 'clear', at least irresistible. Yet A