Myth-Gotten Gains

"Absolutely not," the library clerk said, as clerks shoveled Froome's collection back into his satchel of holding. "All books on our shelves become part of our permanent collection. They are accessible only to card holders! Take them out of here," he instructed the guards.

I had been given the bum's rush more than once while working for Calypsa, and I wasn't about to let it happen again. I shook off all the little hands and marched down the stairs with dignity ahead of the bookworms.

"You're making a mistake," I said. "We have permission to be here. We're making a documentary about this place. You've just earned a role as the designated villain. You've got one chance to make us change our minds."

"Shh!" the guards hissed in unison.

"You have to let me get that book!" Calypsa pleaded, as they hustled her out. They got us into the foyer. Long lines of bookworms were waiting at the desk to check out their choices.

"If you do not listen to me, I will dance until you do!" She threw up her arm.

I grabbed it. "Save it for outside!" I said. I tilted my head toward the door. Her eyes widened, but she nodded and relaxed.

They marched us out into the street, then left us, dusting their hands together. Froome stumbled into the gutter, clutching his bag to his chest. A vehicle shaped like a bowl on wheels with three Bookworms in it screeched to a halt and sounded a horn at him that sounded like an indignant canary. Froome scrambled back onto the pavement and headed for the entrance.

"I'm going back for Payge," he said. "I'll explain it's all a mistake. You can't stop me!"

"Says who?" I demanded, making a beeline for him. "I'm going back for it! I'll toss you over the next building!"

"In front of all of these people?" Froome said. "They'll jump you before you can hit me twice. This is a very law-abiding civilization. I'm going to take back my book!" He turned back to open the door. I dodged in front of him. He tried to get past me. I put a vise grip around his wrist.

"Shall we dance?" I asked. "Buirnie, hit it!"

A blast from the Flute caused everyone, including Froome, to turn and look. Klik, the spotlight, flew about twenty feet into the air and beamed its brightest light down on Calypsa. The drum swung into a sexy rhythm.

"Give it all you've got, girl!" I said.

Calypsa started whirling, waving her arms up and down to the music. In no time, her Dance of Fascination had captured the attention of passersby. Plump, round-faced Bookworms were crowding and shoving to get an unobstructed view of her. The bowl-shaped vehicles stopped where they were. The occupants slithered out to join the growing throng. Bookworms climbed walls and light posts to take a gander at Calypsa.

For her part, the Walt was making the best use of her audience. She flirted with the guys in the front row, tickling under

their chins with her feathered hands as she stepped and sashayed. She brought Ersatz into the act, spi

Suddenly, a finger hooked itself in the corner of my mouth and turned my head. I found myself looking into Tananda's eyes. She shook her head.

"Can't ignore a pretty girl, can you?" "Thanks," I said.

"Don't mention it. She's good, isn't she?"

The effect on Froome was just as good as I had hoped. The Pikinise wizard stopped trying to pull away from me. He stared at Calypsa with his jaw hanging open. I let go of him, and tipped her a wink, careful not to watch her movements too closely.

"Keep him there until I come back," I told Tananda. "I have an idea."

"You have an idea?" Asti said, as I pushed open the door. "That's worth a headline."

"Shut up," I said, with great pleasure. "We are entering a library."

I swaggered up to the desk. If the Tomburgian male behind it was surprised to have a Pervect addressing him, he hid it well. I gave him my most affable smile.

"Afternoon," I said, calmly. "I'd like to apply for a library card."

Applause and gasps of admiration came in through the open door from the street. The librarian behind the desk straightened his goggle-thick glasses on his big nose and peered over my shoulder. "What is going on out there?"

"Who knows?" I said. "May I have the application, please?"

In no time at all, I was the proud possessor of a card for the Main Library System of Tomburg. Two minutes later, I was on the landing where Froome had stowed the Book. It slid

off the shelf into my hands without a catch or a fuss. Two minutes after that I was standing in line at the desk. The same librarian who had given me my card stamped it out.

"You can keep it as long as you need it," he said. "If there's an interlibrary request for it, we can use our crystal ball to find you."

"You do that," I said, blithely. "Have a nice day."

I sauntered out into the street with the Book under my arm. I waved over the heads of the crowd to Calypsa and Tananda.

"Got it!" I called.

With one final spin, Calypsa sheathed the Sword and stopped dancing.

"Awwwww!" The crowd let out a wail of disappointment. Bookworms glanced sheepishly at one another, then scattered about their business. Within moments, the sidewalk was clear of all but a few passersby.

Froome blinked a few times, then came to himself. He saw the Book, and made a grab for it. I stiff-armed him. He was taller than I was, but as weak as a strip club martini.

"Sorry. He's coming with us, now."

"You'll never get away with it," he gasped.

"I just did."

"But, what will I do without him?" Froome said. "He gave me so many ideas!"

"Ideas?" It was my turn to blink. 'You're a magician. Use the force lines, like everybody else."

"Magician?" he said, puzzled. "I'm not a magician. I'm a storyteller."

'You're a what?" I asked, taken aback. "We thought you were using Payge as a grimoire. You're a member of the Magicians' Club."

"No, no!" Froome said. "I do sleight of hand. It makes my live performances more interesting. Payge taught me to dimension-hop. It's so easy anyone can do it."

"Not everyone," I growled.

Froome didn't seem to notice. "Payge is a great teacher. He is far more than a grimoire! He's full of amazing stories, dating back mille

"Shhh!" I growled, looking around at the foot traffic passing us on both sides. "Yes, they are. Don't make headlines out of it."

"Amazing." Froome simply looked fascinated. "I have always lived a very quiet life. All I do is sit in a small room and craft stories, which I sell to make my living. Nothing ever happens to me. One day, I went to a cave, to inspire myself to write a story about underground terrors, and found him there on a shelf, gleaming like a..."

"Like a beacon in the night?" I supplied.

"Yes! You should be a writer. Payge has been my best source material, better than any other book I've ever read. I've been so productive with him critiquing my writing. When I read in his archives that you were coming, I just panicked! I packed up everything I had and fled. He's more than a treasure, he's my friend, my mentor! Are you sure you won't just.. .give him back to me?"

"Sorry, kid. Win some, lose some."

Froome was forlorn. "How can I go to the Saylemanor Festival without him?"

"If leading us on a chase across the dimensions hasn't given you the material for a terrific epic," Tananda said, "then you can't be much of a storyteller."