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CHAPTER FIVE
I WOKE TO A noise.
Sunlight blinded me from the glass roof of the conservatory, hinting it was early afternoon. Memories of the past few hours came back in pieces.
Sharing a meal with Kas and Jareth. The strained small talk between people who had far too much heaviness to speak about light. And the inevitable exhaustion that ensured we all slinked away to find somewhere to sleep once our stomachs were full.
Kas had waited until Jareth had left the room. Neither of us had asked where he’d sleep, and he hadn’t volunteered that information. I didn’t know how successful I’d be at relaxing with him in the house, but Kas had pulled me into a hug and held me, distracting me from everything else but his smell, his heat, his nearness.
A simple, wonderful hug that I didn’t think he’d ever be capable of.
He’d grunted as if shocked he’d done such a thing.
As if a hug was a different language he’d forgotten how to speak.
I melted into him.
All my worries and struggles—from every day since I’d found this valley—went up in smoke thanks to his incredible arms around me.
I’d been hugged before, but I’d never felt how I did in Kas’s arms.
I felt...treasured.
Wanted.
Worshiped.
I’d hugged him back, binding my arms around his waist, the chain belt he wore digging in my skin.
We’d stood like that forever.
Both of us swaying with tiredness.
I wanted to go to bed together. To sleep in his arms and wake up to his kisses. We needed to talk. Tonight felt different. It felt as if he was finally ready to face what he was dealing with, and I didn’t want to let that gift go.
But when he’d pulled away and kissed me gently, his eyes were black with pain and weariness. Whatever mental wounds he still had from his concussion had pushed him past conversation.
If he didn’t sleep, he’d black out. And if he blacked out, who knew if all this incredible progress would be deleted.
I wanted him too much to push him too hard.
I could be patient now that he’d given me a glimmer of hope.
I’d placed the remaining painkillers into his fist and tugged him toward my blankets in the conservatory. But he’d pulled against my invitation, giving me a heart-breaking smile. “I promise you, I’m ready to face what I’ve been ru
I’d opened my mouth to argue, but he merely pressed a finger to my lips. “I don’t want to hurt you. And after tonight...after Jareth’s return and everything else, I can’t guarantee your safety.” His eyes had been so gentle. The kindest I’d ever seen.
Whatever had switched inside him made faith blaze bright in my chest. It promised that all my struggles and trials where this man was concerned were justified. He wasn’t just begi
He was choosing me over death.
Choosing hope over loss.
Choosing happiness over misery.
So I did the only thing I could. I kissed him good night. I watched him head toward the staff stairs to the dorm, then snuggled into my makeshift bedroom in the conservatory and fell asleep.
How many hours had passed since then?
Was Kas still asleep or—
The noise came again.
The same noise that’d woken me. Heavy and violent. A bang or a thud.
Fear flew down my legs.
Kas.
Ripping off my blankets, I shot to my feet and headed into the foyer. The sun shone through the windows and skylights, but the air was cool, feeling more autumn than summer. My hoodie offered some protection, but I still hugged myself as I padded over cold marble, my ears pricking for another sound.
It came again, louder this time, closer.
I broke into a run.
What if Jareth was doing something he shouldn’t? What if Kas was in trouble?
Darting down the corridor toward the kitchen, I slammed to a stop as I found the back door wide open.
Kas never left it open.
Stepping outside, I peered into the bright sunshine.
There.
A figure in the distance, ru
Kas.
Where the hell is he going this time?
Panic flared. Watching him vanish into the woods reminded me too much of last night. Of him ru
Surely, after what he’d said before we went to bed, he wouldn’t do anything stupid. He had me now. He’d accepted he had me. He wouldn’t hurt himself or look for a permanent way out.
Would he?
“Kas!” My body chose the only option; I ran.
I flew out of the kitchen and gave chase.
My sore feet from ru
I kept ru
My skin prickled as he slowed up ahead.
I knew this place.
I recognized it and all the evil it represented.
Slowing, I sucked in a breath as Kas dropped to his knees on the dirt where he’d once marched to kill me. An area of forest where nothing grew, not even weeds.
He sank forward, digging at the ground. A snarl ripped up his throat. “You’re dead. You can’t have her. I won’t fucking let you.”
I halted on the graveyard, breathing hard.
Kas continued to dig, his hands scooping and nails clawing at the earth. “I buried you. You can’t touch her.”
My heart thundered.
What did he see that I couldn’t?
What nightmare was he stuck in this time?
“Kas?” I stepped forward carefully. “Are you—?”
“Gem.” He growled my name, adding more speed, more mania to his bare-fingered digging. “Fuck, Gem!”
He didn’t see me—not in the same world as me.
Whatever he was thinking broke him apart. He wiped his cheek with the back of his hand, smearing blood and dirt.
Blood?
Had he hurt himself?
Unable to stand there while he dreamed whatever he dreamed, I stepped into the clearing. Memories of Kas marching me out here with a spade at my back came thick and fast. We’d tumbled in that very spot. We’d become enslaved to the raw co
That day, I’d left him alone to perish or survive, choosing myself over him.
Today, I choose him.
With fear lodged in my throat and my heart racing, I closed the distance between us. Kas continued to attack the ground, throwing dirt left and right.
A small hole had formed, giving way under his onslaught, digging into the grave where he’d thrown the monsters of this place.
Why was he trying to dig them up? What sort of horrors did he see?
“Kas?” I touched his shoulder, making him flinch. “Kas, please...it’s me.”
He didn’t respond.
Fury glowed on his face, etching into his skin as he glowered at the graves. “Gem—”
The way he said my name broke my love-sick heart.
I knew I should keep my distance. I knew it wasn’t safe to be near him when he was so entrenched in a nightmare, but I couldn’t let him stay there. I couldn’t leave him trapped.
Dropping to my knees beside him, I reached forward and cupped his hands with mine, stilling his digging. “Stop. It’s okay. Everything is alright.”
His head snapped up. His black, dilated gaze caught mine. I sucked in a breath, hoping against hope that he recognized me and didn’t see someone else.
My hopes went unanswered as he bared his teeth and narrowed his eyes to slits. “You.” He rose on his knees, towering over me. “So you want a piece of her too?”
Who? Who did he think I was?
“It’s me, Kas. No one else. Gemma. Wake up. Please, please wake up.”
He threw himself at me, his speed inhuman in the shadows. Pi
“Don’t!” Terror shot through my blood as he wedged his hips into mine, grinding me into the earth.
“You’ve taken them all. You’ve taken me, but you’ll never have her. I’ll kill you all over again if I have to.” He nuzzled his nose against mine, full of threats and warnings. “I’ll kill all of you.”
I bucked up with my hips, making him rock above me. “Stop!”
But it wasn’t any use.
His hands latched tighter around my neck, his thumbs wedging against my voice box. “There’s no way out of this. No way you don’t die tonight for trying to hurt her. You. Can’t. Have. Her.”
I fought.
I kicked and scratched.
I tried to speak, but his hands cut off my oxygen.
Black spots appeared in my vision.
Blinding panic drenched me.
I fought harder.
I gasped.
I thrashed.
My lungs burned for air.
Kas, please!
I was choking.
Dying.
All his promises about not hurting me again. All the newness of togetherness and hope.
It meant nothing.
We were back to repeating the past.
A shape collided into Kas, knocking him sideways, unlocking his hands from around my throat.
I rolled onto my side, gulping forest-thick air.
A grunt sounded beside me as the two men grappled. Two furious blurs pouring toxic pain and lethal hatred into the grave they fought upon.
With black spots still dancing in my vision, I scooted backward until I sat on the edge where grass dared to grow. An obvious ring around the monsters Kas had buried here. I gulped and rubbed my bruised neck, never looking away from the savage fight.
The second one in a few short hours.
A fight where Jareth seemed to be wi
I cried out as his fist swung true, striking Kas’s temple with a sickening crunch.
“No!” I fell forward onto my hands and knees, doing my best to command heavy limbs to crawl to them. “His c-concussion—” I coughed around the swelling Kas had given me. “Don’t hit h-his...head!”
Too late.
Jareth struck again and sprang to his feet, acting as if the beating Kas had given him had miraculously healed. Backing away, he flexed his hands, looking down at Kas who didn’t get up.