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I’d been so full of old hate and wariness, letting it snare me, corrupt me to such a degree that I’d hurt the most honest woman to walk this earth. The woman who had chosen to come to me. Might have held affection for me. Inklings of love?
But that was before…
Before I’d condemned to carry mortal’s viciousness carved into her belly. Before I’d refused her my warmth, even though I knew the harrowing coldness of death. Before I’d given her a crown of children’s fingers. Before I’d lowered her into a damn grave.
“An immortal child…” Yarin mused as he ran his thumb across his bottom lip, staring at the tip of his boot where he’d crossed his legs at the end of the daybed. “It just occurred to me that I might have sired thousands of those, unknowingly leaving them behind in the rotting bellies of countless whores. Not even I can find anything to laugh about that. You know full well how much I love children… such pleasant thoughts in their heads.”
I pulled Ada’s limp body tighter against me, taking another searing inhale until the lick of shame scalded my core. “It ca
“Unless…” His nail tapped against the bottom row of his teeth a few times. “Unless you can convince our beloved brother to restore her. With her soul bound to her intact form, your woman is but a breath away from life.”
Eilam’s breath, for he was the god of life and its absence. Where most mortals spent their existence without ever crossing my or Yarin’s path, each one had met my brother at least once.
“Rebirth.” A capricious flutter came to my chest, rousing a hope that collapsed into despair but a moment later. “He will never agree.”
“Hmm… Yes… the drowning.”
And likely that one beheading six centuries back… “Among other things.”
“No, you are quite right, Enosh. He will refuse.” Yarin raked his fingers through his auburn strands, then propped his arm beneath his head. “Unless you leave him no choice but to agree. Nothing vexes him more than a good old sweep of a
My shoulders stiffened.
If memory served, my last act of rage had devastated the lands beyond the Soltren Gate to a degree it had still not recovered after two centuries. Oh, what a mess that had been. Should that cause me hesitation?
Drowned lands, devastated towns, the decimation of entire bloodlines mortals valued so dearly… What was it to me? The Pale Court would forever endure, sheltering my wife and child within.
Yet one problem remained.
“My wife has a kind heart, carrying so little of mortal’s corruption.” What had gained her my admiration now proved an issue. “I shall have the high priest’s head, this much I vow, and I will destroy this false god they pray to. She will understand. But the rest of the retched lot…”
… needed to die, too.
How many?
Only my brother knew.
Ah, I’d told Ada that her hate did not bother me, so as long as I had her. Perhaps I was a liar after all, for I wanted little more than for her to love me back. Yet the moments where I showed mercy to the wicked had softened her toward me.
Mercy would not return her breath.
Only devastation.
Yarin sighed. “They stabbed her in the belly. Surely your wife must now see their offense and carry a hint of hatred?”
“A hint will not do.”
“A hint is all I require for my whispers to go u
“Now I know you’re up to no good.” Eager to twist my wife’s head where I wanted our love to be true, and not tainted by illusions of any kind. “I do not want you anywhere near her thoughts. Unless she leaves me no choice.”
“Such jealousy is unbecoming of a god,” he tsked. “I presume you could try to… make her see sense.”
Make her see sense.
My heart burned, and for once, not at the feverish mercy of shame and guilt. No, it was the searing edge I would have to balance, whetted with the choices of saving our child or gain my wife’s love.
Could I achieve both?
Perhaps one with the other?
But something else burned inside me, too—a sudden realization that made me curl around Ada’s still body. Death was her eternal prison, tethering her to me if I ensured she remained in my presence. In life, she’d slipped me once, and she might slip again.
Yes, Eilam could give her life.
And life meant freedom.