Zen and the Art of Vampires

"I can't leave just yet," I said absently, wondering what had happened to Denise. She had nothing to do with my situation, so it was likely that if some accident had befallen her, it was entirely unrelated. The police, however, would not entertain that thought.

"You can't? Why?"

I explained to her the happenings since I'd last seen her, leaving out the part about having incredible sex with Kristoff.

"Good lord, you certainly have been busy," she said when I finished up. Alec's footstep was audible as he crossed the kitchen. She leaned close to me and whispered, "So do you think you're Alec's whatchamawhosit? Beloved?"

"No, I don't think so," I answered just as quietly. "Kristoff was hungry, so I let him… for lack of a better phrase, dine. He said if I was a Beloved, he wouldn't be able to do that."

"You know, this is really fascinating. And exciting. But what are you going to do about tonight?"

"The ritual, you mean?"

She nodded.

I glanced around the room. Several of the ghosts had drifted off to the kitchen to see what Alec was doing. Dagrun had thrown herself down on the couch opposite, and appeared to go to sleep. Agda demanded to see the inside privy, and the other women had gone with her to see what modern plumbing looked like. Other than Dagrun, we were alone. Quickly, I explained my reasoning regarding the two marriages.

"That makes sense, I guess," she said after mulling it over for a few seconds. "So if Mattias is your real husband, are you going to become Super Zorya?"

"I don't know. I don't want anyone to die, but I made an oath to A

She was silent for a moment, her fingers absently twisting the material of her linen walking shorts. "You know, I think I'd take what your husband said with a grain of salt."

I cast my mind back to anything that Kristoff might have said that could be in question.

"He said that once you had the power, you wouldn't be able to control it."

"Oh, Mattias? Yes, he did say that. It seems… counterintuitive, doesn't it?"

"Yup. You know what I think?" She tipped her head to the side as she considered me. "I think he was bullshitting you."

"You don't think they can bestow powers on me without me being there?"

"No, actually, I can see that. You've already got this stone that makes you Zorya, so that's the part you're responsible for. You accepted the job. I admit it's a bit odd having the power come through recognition of that by your fellow Brotherhoodians, but eh. People do weird things sometimes. No, it's that whole song and dance about once you have the power, you'll have to use it whether or not you want to. I don't buy that, I don't buy that at all."

Now that I had time to sit and think about it, it didn't seem right to me, either. "I'm very big on the idea of free will," I said, nodding. "No one can make me do something that's morally reprehensible, not even if I had all the power of the moon. A

"Exactly. Maybe someone who didn't have a lot of mental gumption couldn't control her powers, but you? Bah. You've got gumption coming out of your pores."

"Thank you," I said, smiling. I felt surprisingly better at that thought.

She eyed me curiously. "So does that mean you're going to go ahead and let them do the ceremony? Or are you going to give in to this Christian fellow and let the vamps bully you into giving up your oath?"

I glanced toward the door. Alec was visible in the kitchen, surrounded by Ulfur and Hallur and a couple other ghosts, all of whom were examining his clothing while Alec spoke to someone on his cell phone.

"I've never enjoyed being pushed around," I said softly. "Not by anyone. And I don't intend to be used, nor will I let anyone die because of me. If I'm in a position of power, I can get the ghosts to Ostri, and keep everyone safe—Brotherhood people and vampires alike."

"Atta girl," Magda said with approval, giving my arm another pat. "That's part of your oath to A

"I don't know," I said slowly. "I honestly don't believe Kristoff or Alec had anything to do with her murder. And Christian said none of his people did."

"You believe him," she said, making it a statement, not a question.

"As a matter of fact, I do."

"So, who did kill her? And why was she killed in your bathroom?"

"It's your bathroom just as much as it is mine," I protested weakly.

She gave me a look that made me ashamed. "You said yourself the door was locked on your side. Besides, I didn't know her, and you did. There must be some co

"If there is, I can't figure it out," I said, feeling helpless again. "I think it has something to do with the fact that I ran into A

"I still say it's that Ilargi person. You're sure one of the vamps isn't him?"

"I'm not sure, but I really don't think so. None of them feel"—I made a vague gesture—"evil. Dangerous, yes. Mysterious, and unmoving, and not at all the sort of person you want to meet in a dark alley—oh, hell yes! But soul sucking? No. Not that."

"Hrm." Magda looked pensive. "Well, I suppose finding her murderer isn't as pressing as dealing with this situation. I'm sure you'll work it out in the end. Now, what can I do to help?"

I glanced at the clock. Night had set in. "There's about two hours before the ritual is supposed to begin. I don't know how many other Brotherhood people are gathering for the ritual, although I don't think it's a whole lot. There's just not time to bring in people from outside of the area, and Mattias told me a few nights back that there are only like five total members who live in Iceland. So I think the first thing is for me to get out of town. You think you can get a car?"

"Done and doner," she said, saluting. "Then we'll go to the ruins?"

"I'll go. I don't think it's going to be safe for you at all," I said, quickly interrupting her protests. "I know you want to help, Magda, but really, the best thing you can do is stay away from the ruins. I don't want to have to worry about protecting you from anyone's ire just because you helped me, especially if that means I can't control whatever is going on at the time."

She opened her mouth to protest, closing it again with a muttered, "Damn. I hate it when you make sense."

"I promise I'll tell you everything that happens," I said, getting to my feet, one eye on Alec. He had his back to me, still talking on the phone. "Assuming I can, that is."

"Don't be such a negative Nelly," Magda said, heading for the front door. "I'll be back in a flash with a car. And I'm going to hold you to that promise, missy. If I have to sacrifice my curiosity, I want a full disclosure on the happenings."

I waved good-bye and sank back down onto the couch. I just hoped I'd be around to fulfill that promise.