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CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX
Relief and concern whirled together as I scooted to the edge of the bed. “That was not at all what I expected you to say.”
“And I didn’t expect you to feel that before me.” Pulling the pants up to his hips, he looked up and over at me. “Your senses are continuing to progress impressively.”
“I’m going to hold off on bragging about that until you tell me exactly what I felt that involves the Abyss.”
“I’m not sure.” He tugged a tunic over his head. “I can only feel the unrest radiating from there, though that is not entirely uncommon. Sometimes, it’s an escaped soul.”
I supposed that would explain why it felt like something was here that didn’t belong. “And when it’s not that?”
His gaze met mine. “Other times, when a soul makes it out, it stirs up the rest and becomes an uprising of sorts.”
I didn’t need any foresight to know that an uprising in the Abyss, where souls paid for every evil deed they committed while alive, wasn’t good.
I rose. “I just need to find something to wear.”
Ash grabbed the leather straps of his baldric. “That won’t be necessary.”
I turned my head toward him. Did he really expect me to stand back when he wasn’t? Oh, he knew better than that. “What do you mean it won’t be necessary? And don’t say it’s because I can’t enter the Abyss. I know I can,” I said, having had no knowledge of that before it came out of my mouth.
“Yes, you can.” Draping one of the straps over his shoulder, his fingers moved expertly over the baldric. “But that doesn’t mean you should.”
Crossing my arms, irritation flared to life. “Is it because the Abyss is your thing, and you’re, like, asserting boundaries or something?”
He paused, brows snapping together. “Seriously?”
I lifted a shoulder. “It’s a valid question. I mean, that is your arena.”
He stared at me for a moment, then curtly shook his head. “It has nothing to do with that. Especially since you’re the true Primal of Life, Sera. All the realm is your thing.”
My chest squeezed, and not because that was still overwhelming to hear. And it was. But it was how he looked at me. As if he couldn’t believe I would suggest such a thing. I hadn’t meant to offend him with my question, but perhaps I had. I shifted, uncomfortable. “Then why?”
“Would you like one reason or many?”
My eyes narrowed as my guilt over possibly upsetting him vanished. “Would you like me to give you one reason or many to explain the anger I’m sure I’m projecting all over you?”
I swore I saw him grin as he turned his head to the side. “You’re the Queen.”
“And you’re the King.”
“Yes, but you’re the Queen.” He buckled the harness, looking up. “The true Primal of Life.”
“Whose senses are progressing impressively, according to you,” I snapped. “And it’s not like I just Ascended yesterday, so it isn’t like I need to be resting and eating and feeding every five seconds.”
“That has nothing… Fuck.” Eather pulsed behind his pupils as his gaze swept over me. His lips parted, revealing a hint of fang as his citrus scent increased. “I’m not sure how I’m supposed to reason with you,” he said, his voice smoothening and deepening. “Not when you’re standing before me gloriously naked.”
Sultry heat hit my veins as my body happily responded to his arousal, but every other part of me was so not on board. “Well, you’d better figure it out.” I watched him cross the space between us. “I can help, Ash, and I refuse to sit back and do nothing while you put yourself in danger just because I’m the…whatever. That is not how this is going to play out.”
“I would never expect you to do that. I wouldn’t even want that.” He caught a strand of hair that had fallen against my cheek. “It thrills me that you have my back. You have to know that. But you are the Primal of Life.”
I stared up at him, my frustration rising. “I know. That’s been repeatedly established, Ash.”
“But you haven’t really thought about it.” He clasped the nape of my neck. “You would be entering the Abyss, Sera. Not just the outskirts, where the riders had you, but deep within the Abyss. Every soul there will sense you—will be drawn to you.”
I immediately thought about the Shades gathering at the edges of the Dying Woods.
“That alone will cause things to escalate,” he continued. “But it’s more than that. You’re already worried about not being able to stop yourself from bringing someone back. And remember what I said about my father struggling against his instinct to intervene when near the Pillars and how much it saddened him? Being there could be overwhelming for you.”
I clamped my jaw shut, causing my fangs to scrape the insides of my mouth. “Ouch,” I muttered, touching my lip. “These godsdamn fangs.”
“Careful with them. I like the way they feel.” Ash cupped my cheek, tilting my head back. “I need to go.”
The rational side of me knew he was right. My presence would make things worse, and my already tenuous restraint on my ability to restore life would be tested. Then again, I wasn’t sure I’d be all that inclined to bring those in the Abyss back to life.
And that part of me also knew I was wasting time. I exhaled roughly. “I hate the idea of you going out there and facing who knows what when I can’t be there with you.”
“I know.” He dipped his head and captured my lips with his. The kiss was fierce and hard, igniting a throbbing ache I probably should’ve been a little ashamed of but wasn’t. “Just as I hated it when you entered the mortal realm without me.”
“But I had Nektas with me.”
“And I will have Crolee and many guards.”
Closing my eyes, I grasped the front of his tunic. “Be careful.”
“Always.” His mouth found mine once more.
I forced myself to let go of his tunic. Sitting on the edge of the bed, I watched him step back. Wisps of shadows seeped from him, swirling around his legs.
Then he was gone, shadowstepping from the chamber.
I threw myself back until I was flat on my back. Prone, I stared at the glossy ceiling.
“Ash will be okay,” I reminded myself. Problems at the Pillars of Asphodel were common, and he said it was the same at the Abyss. There was no reason for me to be so anxious.
Knowing there was no way I would be able to go back to sleep, I rose again. Worry gnawed at me, coating my skin like thick oil. This wasn’t as bad as being stuck in the cage and unable to do anything, but the waiting and not knowing what was happening was just as stifling.
I plucked up the pale, silky nightgown from the floor and slipped it on. My gaze went to the balcony doors, and then I made my way over to the wardrobe. Two robes hung there, one the dark gray robe made of crushed velvet I’d already worn. The other was a shade of deep violet. A pattern of ivy had been stitched in black along the lower portion of the robe and the chest, framing the delicate pearl-capped buttons on both. The amount of time it must have taken for Erlina to create something like this on a piece of clothing one usually only wore in their bedchamber had to be staggering.
I reached for the pretty garment and then froze. Tiny bumps rose all over my body. Slowly, I turned to the balcony doors once more and held still. The palace was completely silent. Whatever was occurring in the Abyss had no effect here.
But…
I grabbed the dark gray robe and shoved my arms into the sleeves. As I buttoned it, I crossed the chamber. Pushing the drapes aside, I opened the doors and stepped out. My fingers tingled strangely as I looked up. The night sky was as black as shadowstone, but it was blanketed by brilliant stars that cast silvery light over the courtyard and the Rise. Breathing in the rich scent of soil and a faint trace of woodsmoke, I walked to the railing. I could make out the forms of a dozen or so guards patrolling the wall.
The feeling of u
But something was wrong.
Something was wrong here.
My skin continued to prickle as I looked at the sky once more. Stars winked in and out, momentarily obscured by…
Leaning forward, I squinted. More stars flickered. The sensation of wrongness coated my skin now, igniting the most primitive instincts. My lips parted as I stared, making out shapes in the sky. Fast-moving shapes with wings—
A shocking sound shattered the silence, a shriek so chilling I thought it would freeze the very air. I jerked back from the railing. Shrill, piercing screams followed in a macabre chorus as the guards along the Rise spun toward the road leading to the Pillars.
A jolt of surprise rippled through me. I’d heard those shrieks before. When I came out of the cavernous tu
I stiffened as one of the shapes flew closer, moving as fast as a draken. I caught a glimpse of a wingspan larger than Reaver’s. “What in the—?”
In the blink of an eye, something came at the guard closest to the road. There was a blur of talons, dark-feathered legs, long, straggly hair, and…a vaguely mortal-like body. The creature dug its talons into the man’s back. The guard let out a pained, wet sound as he was lifted into the air and flown out over the courtyard, thrashing and screaming the whole time.
The thing dropped the guard.
Out of reflex, I shot toward the railing and tracked the guard’s rapid descent. The heavy smack of a body hitting the ground turned my stomach. My heartbeat stuttered. The guard must have been a godling because heat flared against my palms when the all-too-familiar urge to intervene, to steal the guard’s life away from death, slammed into me.
My hands curled into fists as the thing flew up, letting out a grating, crackling noise. But I was locked to where I stood, staring at the guard on the ground as I reminded myself that I couldn’t intervene. I couldn’t. I started to force myself to look away, but something was happening.
A flicker of light seeped out from the guard, forming a small orb of softly glowing golden light. What was I seeing? The skin of my neck tickled as the small ball of light floated up several feet before fading. Instinct told me the light hadn’t really disappeared.
It had only moved to the Pillars, where it would take the shape of the man once more.
I’d never seen anything like that before, but I’d heard what it was called here and in every realm—even the ones beyond the Primal Veil. It was the spirit of an individual. Their i