Tanner’s Tiger

“Not quite.”

“But sometimes I do hear voices.”

“Oh? What do they say?”

She took me in hand, so to speak. “They say, ‘Do it again, do it again!’”

When such voices speak, one obeys.

Chapter 8

I had breakfast ready when Arlette awoke the next morning. I scrambled eggs, buttered toast, browned spicy sausages, and perked coffee. All but the last of these efforts turned out to be superfluous as far as the Unmaid of Orleans was concerned. She grunted unintelligibly, poured herself a cup of coffee, tasted it, made a face, laced it liberally with cognac, and sulked over it in a corner.

Few persons are at their best in the morning. I ca

If I had to pick one reason above all others for treasuring my permanent insomnia, it would be simply this – I never have to get up.

Arlette did, though, and poorly. I tried to pay as little attention to her as possible for the half hour during which she came gradually to life. This was not only simple courtesy but a matter of personal taste. She was less than charming. Her ragged mop of hair, so charming a few hours earlier, now looked like the coiffure of a small-time Medusa, a nest of lifeless earthworms. Her complexion bordered on jaundice. Her eyes were puffy. And her entire demeanor was the sort only to be viewed in those horror movies in which corpses walk.

Rebirth took half an hour. It was like a death scene – the last act of “Camille,” say – filmed via time-lapse photography and then shown backward. The eyes un-puffed, the mouth ungrimaced, the body firmed up, the whole person came back to the land of the living. At last she was sufficiently in control of herself to find her way to the bathroom, from which she emerged as the Arlette I had known and loved (and loved, and loved) just a little while earlier.

“Evan, my heart,” she said. “What a beautiful morning!”

It was all of that, bright and warm and clear. “And you are beautiful, Arlette.”

“I am horrid in the mornings. Such beautiful food you created, and I could eat none of it.”

“I ate your share myself.”

“Commendable. But how could you eat with such an apparition as myself in the room?”

“You are always beautiful in my eyes, Arlette.”

“And you tell magnificent lies. Did you sleep well, Evan?”

“I have not slept better in years.”

“And why should we not be tired, eh?” She chuckled, then turned serious. “But your little girl,” she said. “We must act, is it not so?”

I had told her of Mi

“I meant to get the newspapers,” I said.

“You should not leave the apartment. I will go.”

“All right.”

Once again she purchased all the papers, the English-language ones as well as the French, and once again I worked my way through all of them. There was some marvelous copy about me that Arlette insisted upon clipping. I was presently the object of the greatest manhunt in Montreal ’s history since Francois Somebody butchered seven young boys with a straight razor in 1911. I was somewhat relieved to learn, however, that I had not butchered anyone. A dozen persons had been treated for injuries in the auto wrecks Prince Hal had caused, but all but two had been sent home immediately, and those two would live.

So would Sergeant William Rowland, RCMP, although it would be a while before he was back on a horse. He had landed on his head, all right, but I guess his Smoky The Bear hat served a purpose, because he came out of it alive. He had a fractured skull, but it takes more than that to impair a Mountie.

Prince Hal had not turned up by presstime. I found this pleasing news, too, and only hoped the little boy was taking good care of him.

And I, I was thoroughly castigated by every newspaper around. It no longer looked as though my capture would result in prompt extradition to the States. The Canadian authorities had a score of their own to settle with me, and charges would be brought against me for everything from subversive conspiracy, malicious mischief, resisting an officer, assault with a deadly weapon (a horse?), and unlawful flight to ru

It looked as though it would not be a good idea to let them catch me.

It also looked as though the police did not have Mi

I put the last paper aside and looked up at Arlette, who had been waiting more or less patiently.

“Well?”

“They don’t have her.”

“Who does?”

I stood up, performed my caged-lion imitation, then turned to face her again. “I keep coming back to those damned Cubans,” I said. “I can’t think what motive they might have had-”

“Nor could I. After all, she is not the Queen of England!”

She was the someday Queen of Lithuania, but I had not brought this fact to Arlette’s attention. She was also my little friend and ostensible daughter, but I had similarly failed to tell Arlette that I was an American agent, much as I had failed to tell the Chief that I wasn’t. I had to agree, though, that she was not the Queen of England.

“Let’s forget motive,” I said. “I have a hunch something fu

“It is impossible, Evan. You would be recognized.”

“I could disguise myself-”

“Your photograph is everywhere. Even if you covered your head with a paper sack, you would be recognized. I will go.”

“You?”

“Of course. Am I wanted by the police? Am I one to arouse their suspicions? Am I even one who has been within the pavilion? No, no, no. And so why should I not go?”

“You wouldn’t know what to look for.”

“What would you look for?”

“Well, uh-”

“You see?” She spread her little hands in triumph. “Even you do not know what it is that you wish to find. And so I will go. It is settled.”

“You really ought to be careful.”

“Of what?”

“Don’t do anything, well, unusual.”

She smiled reminiscently. “Sometimes I am fond of doing unusual things, cabbage.”