Alphas burden

5AVERY

Most of the cabins are quiet by the time I’m on the main road ru

It’s held at the fire pit on the commons, the central lawn in front of a semicircle made up of the alpha’s massive lodge and offices, the log-style community building where shifters gather for meetings or stay in the dormitories, the patrol cabin where all pack security matters are handled, and the dining hall and pavilion. Anyone assigned to a kitchen duty rotation is likely bustling tonight for the party.

I make my way to Nina’s cabin, grateful that she doesn’t live on the Blackburn compound. Caden’s uncle keeps his entire brood within the walled-off section of homes as if they’re their own pack within the main pack. He usually has his many sons, nephews, and grandsons posted at the entrances like his own private security.

My guess is, her mate has either disappointed Cormac or isn’t useful, so he’s cast out from living amongst the rest of his extended family despite being a member of Cormac’s shady guards. Caden mostly ignores his many cousins, though whenever you cross a Blackburn that isn’t Caden or his sister, Callie, they act as though they’re above everyone else for being related to the alpha, no matter how much space is spread between them on their family tree.

When I rap my knuckles lightly against Nina’s back screened door, she answers out of breath, glancing behind me when she yanks me inside.

“Did anyone see you?”

I tug free. “No. It’s deserted on your street. Everyone’s already out.”

She sags in relief. “Good.”

I follow her through the dimly lit house. My cottage might be smaller, yet her place is depressingly oppressive, the walls stinking of her mate’s aggression. I shudder, folding my arms. In the kitchen, her pup blows spit bubbles around a teething ring in his crib. She takes me through the pantry to her basement steps.

“No pack run for you tonight?”

Her head ducks. “No. Trent doesn’t like letting anyone else but his own family watch the baby, even my mother. He says it's how his family has always done things. So I stay home instead of using the nursery for bonfire nights.”

My nose wrinkles. I doubt he’s hanging around to help her out with their pup himself.

It’s not that this pack is one of those backwards ones I’ve heard of in the remote parts of the world that believe their females only serve one purpose, either. Our she-wolves work all the same job classes as the men, and some choose not to have pups at all. Yet injustices like this still exist here.

“Here.” Nina closes her huge freezer, shoving a chilled hunk of meat wrapped in paper and twine into my chest. “Your payment. Now you should go. I can’t have Trent smelling that anyone was here he didn’t approve of inviting in.”

She lifts her brows impatiently when I don’t immediately move. I want to tell her again that I have several poisons, most undetectable. No one would suspect a thing. There’s no risk she’d be detained in the holding cells in the security crew’s cabin.

Or I could convince her to take this to Caden’s offices and plead her case for his mediation in the matter. He might be a bastard, but as strict as he is, he wouldn’t overlook this if he knew how she’s being treated. The last time he found out about a male smacking around his mate, he gave him a beating on the central lawn and made the entire pack watch.

Nina gives me a shove with a warning rumble. “Go. I don’t want my baby around a Wolfless for too long. He needs to grow up big and strong like his father.”

She acts as though I’m diseased and contagious. If I had a wolf, I’d love to snap at her to put her in her place. She sounds like the narrow-minded elders who are traditionalists, believing the lack of a wolf is a sign of weakness.

I show my teeth and push into her space. A

I offer her a wan smile. “Until next time.”

Without waiting for her, I climb the stairs and head through the back door. I fantasize about all the ways to get retribution on Nina’s behalf against her terrible chosen mate.

I don’t realize I’ve walked to the bonfire on autopilot until I’m skirting the edge of the log benches circling the fire pit. A group of children race by shrieking with laughter. A pang echoes in my chest, filling me with the longing to be part of the pack the way I used to. It’s not right to feel so isolated.

The strange urge to join them tugs at me. I glance down the empty road while trying to talk myself out of it, then inch closer to the festivities.

They’re deep into the celebration now, the grills going with the savory aroma of succulent meat and fresh bread being passed around the long tables packed with food. Some are playing music on fiddles and singing folk songs for the moon goddess about her descent from the Heavens to be with the wolf she fell in love with. The elders sit around with cigars, some with wayward pups bouncing on their knees. I don’t spot anyone in the white linens we wear for a coming of age ceremony, so no one will be shifting for the first time.

I tip my face up to the moon. Even without a wolf, there are times I’m able to sense a distant co

Shift.

Something inside my chest flutters. I feel it sometimes. It’s merely a phantom sensation after a lifetime of living amongst shifters who talk nonstop about what their wolf feels like.

I gave up hoping I would join them in that experience when mine never came by the time I turned eighteen, leaving me standing alone at the ceremony that month bearing the hard stares of everyone who didn’t want a Morgan there anyway while the others chased each other in their new forms. There are late bloomers who grow up with minimal signs of their beast, but by twenty I knew the silence within me would never be filled.

I don’t draw attention to myself as I weave around groups of people, giving a wide enough berth to not be noticed as someone not welcome for the bonfire.

Sticking to the shadows where the firelight doesn’t reach, I amuse myself watching Callie Blackburn get into trouble at the drinks table with her feisty best friend, Taryn Barnes.

“I’m not supposed to serve more than three drinks,” the bartender says.

“Who said that? My brother? I’m bringing this drink to him. You’re not going to refuse our alpha another whiskey, are you?” Callie prompts. “He specifically asked me to get it for him.”

She plays up the pack princess attitude people usually give her crap for behind her back, leaning across the bar to keep the attention on her as Taryn moves to the other end of it, eyeing the selection. I smirk, catching on to what they’re doing. I’m not the only one, either. Liam's narrowed gaze is on Taryn from several feet away, already moving to push past the group of women deep in their wine glasses.

Callie keeps the guys ma

“Can’t go one night without trouble, can you, Miss Barnes?” He pulls her into his chest and frisks her.

“Jeez, buy a girl a drink first before you try to take her out to the woods to rut her,” Taryn sasses with a laugh. “Didn’t your dam teach you any ma

“Didn’t yours teach you right from wrong?” he counters as he pulls the contraband free. “Yeah, guess you ditched that day of lessons. What a surprise.”

“Live a little. It’s good for you. Break one rule. Go on, I dare you.”

Liam growls, leaning over her shoulder. She snaps her teeth at him playfully, completely unthreatened and unrepentant.

Callie laughs and knocks back the drink she convinced the barkeep was for her brother. “Goddess save us all. You two should just mate already for how often you bicker. You’re worse than True Mates, always in each other's business.”

Taryn pretends to retch. “If the Goddess did me like that, I’d question why she turned her back on me.”

Liam clenches his jaw, tearing his scowl from Taryn. “Let’s go. Both of you.”

“Me?” Callie protests.

“Both of you,” Liam reiterates through his teeth, snagging her elbow while yanking Taryn close enough that her red hair snags on the dark brown scruff shadowing his jaw.

“Both at once?” Taryn fakes a gasp. “Liam, you dirty dog. I can’t wait to hear these rumors spread at breakfast tomorrow. Think it’ll reach the commissary by lunch? What will Alpha Caden say about his star lieutenant slipping off with his sister and her friend?”

The firelight is just bright enough to spot the vein throbbing above his brow. I roll my lips between my teeth and silently cheer Taryn on.

“That’s enough. You’re spending the night in the pen for stealing,” Liam says resolutely.

Callie digs her feet in and argues, “What about⁠—?”

“You can shift in the cells and sleep in a huddle to keep each other warm for all I care,” he snaps.

I turn around when the three of them head my way, not wanting Liam to decide I’m doing something wrong, too. My chin dips to my chest and I weather the old ache of missing their friendship. When Caden went from my friend to my enemy, I also lost my relationship with all three of them. Only Taryn will speak to me these days if our paths cross.

A deep, unpleasant laugh draws my attention. Nina’s mate cozies up with two females by the other end of the drinks table, standing far too close and admiring the view their low-cut tops grant him. He’s shameless, sniffing after them when he’s forced Nina to stay home.

My lip curls. I’m definitely adding something that causes hair loss to Nina’s next sedative order. It’s the least he deserves. I hope his wolf’s fur turns out patchy, too.

It’s not uncommon to find mates messing around with others. Some chosen matings turn out to be good matches that last the test of time. Others who aren’t happy to be mated will settle their bond just to avoid the heat sickness that comes from resisting a mating frenzy, then avoid each other as long as possible.

Only those with a True Mate bond granted by fate are unable to stray because their mate is their world.

My parents had a bond like that. Their love was clear for anyone to see, always pulled to each other anywhere they went, eyes lighting up whenever they saw each other even if they’d only gone to the other room. It’s impossible to say why Mom was able to walk away from it because it drove Dad crazy after she went missing, to the point he betrayed his closest friend when he wouldn’t listen by challenging him for the alpha title.